TempoLane
Need some time off
ライティング
読書の
78
本を読む
バッジ
5瞬間
50
TempoLane1yrに返信 DungeYup, it would take him a lot of lifespan to just stay afloat five meters above the ground for ten minutes if he didn't use incantation
Thankfully, the infrastructure quality and accomodations were more than top notch. There were a lot of one way magi-tech travelator platform that elevate people and goods to afloat in the air as they could swiftly flew maneuver and flew in decent speed. In Illanoir's opinion, it might be one of the best feeling that he had.- TempoLane1yrに返信 Mr_Babbles
Thank you for the review! You're pretty much pointing all of the issues that I have with this book lol. Ngl, this just a fun writing submission but the early part of the story irritated me in the same way. While I can rewrite most of it, my work took the majority of my focus and I'm kinda lazy to fix something that I didn't focus as much anymore. The deceptively awful grammar issue is one of the core reason. Mostly because it has been a long time since I wrote anything in English, meanings and sentence structure is kinda butchered throughout the way. The fact that I only have two hours to write per day doesn't help. The book's quality will stay as it is, but I take the pointer as a resources for my next project. Thank you for giving this book a chance! I'm surprised that you didn't set the rating lower.
- TempoLane1yrに返信 TempoLane
On a second thought, maybe it is better to add the whole thing directly into this section to make it easier for adding more scene. It won't take more than 4 paragraph approximately.
"I see, so it took me 900 years of lifespan to destroy this desk." Illanoir analyzed his hand that had been overclocked to contain a magic with an affinity that was less than 2%. "Could have been worse." - TempoLane1yrに返信 GiovanniG
It's been a while since he use any Destruction magic, he wanted to test out the efficiency. As for how he dared to do it, it will be revealed later although it has been hinted that it had something to do with how he is able to live for 25,000 years to begin with. He is conscious of that, of course. With this comment, I can see the action may raise some doubt, so I'll add more details to makes less misunderstanding. Thank you for pointing it out ( ^ ^)/
"I see, so it took me 900 years of lifespan to destroy this desk." Illanoir analyzed his hand that had been overclocked to contain a magic with an affinity that was less than 2%. "Could have been worse." - TempoLane1yrコメントCh 100 Divination from the Bad Fable
- TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_MCh 1 Easygoing Egoist
- TempoLane1yrに返信 JuaniBL18
Somehow, it change the whole personality
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 JuaniBL18
Ahahah, I swear that I already checked all the paragraph.
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
it has been updated now. If there is anything left missing, do point it out :)
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 JuaniBL18
thank you for pointing it out!
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
Yeah ahaha. I might either keep it as it is or change it if I have the time.
I didn't plan to meet with others just yet, so I tried to use my Break Tidal as a movement technique by layering the barrier akin to a floating stepping platform. Thanks to it, I managed to get on top of one of the four towering white monoliths, nearing the height of the Hive from the world above. - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
I think I was too sleepy writing it back then but I checked source where Faust discovered it and it is Break Tidal? Dunno, even I'm confused in this lol
I didn't plan to meet with others just yet, so I tried to use my Break Tidal as a movement technique by layering the barrier akin to a floating stepping platform. Thanks to it, I managed to get on top of one of the four towering white monoliths, nearing the height of the Hive from the world above. - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
thank you for the pointer!
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_MCh 86 The Eye on the Other Side
- TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
Fixed, thank you for the pointing 👍
この段落は削除されました。 - TempoLane1yrに返信 Rune_M
Ah! Thank you for pointing it out!
この段落は削除されました。