ライティング
読書の
2053
本を読む
enjoying your story so far, but it seems to be a bit too fast paced. some of the connections and progression in the story seem way too fast, especially since he has only been in the world for not even a month, yet he is drawing attention from a magical academy. how does he know about the alabaster academy and that it's knows for it's scholars? there isn't any connection between what's happened so far and where the story is. i get you're trying to add different layers into the story but it feels a bit forced.
dratini not dragonite
but how come he knows her? apart from the encounter in the poke centre they haven't had any interaction.
what happened to the auction?
yeah but just remember that his previous works weren't hugely popular and spread out. people liked it but he didn't have a lot of exposure. i get what you're saying and if with the next update for stats we don't see an exponential increase in views/visits then i totally agree that his scale isn't quite right, for the first 12 hrs though that would be quite realistic for something going viral compared to a population in the quadrillions
Glory to the cult
didn't you just say before it was 1500 gold?
always been with him??? hasn't he had Drakor for only a few hours? or at most a day?
it kind of feels like Dumbledore rolled over a bit too easy tbh, the train of argument was good and all, but it just resolved itself too quickly. i think you might need to flesh out the argument between moody and Albus a bit more. it seems like you've gone the manipulating Dumbledore path, and it seemed a bit lack luster. didn't get me wrong, I'm looking the way the story it going, nice take on a HP fanfic
i thought that this was 2 years before the meteor shower???