5 Professor Black

In a magical castle in a far-off land several boys and girls entered a classroom, the castle they are attending for their education is a place for young men and women to learn to control their powers in a semi-safe environment so they can further progress into the dangerous working world.

The students entered and were slightly confused by the layout of the room, normally they attend in a lecture hall type structure not a line off desks. They shrugged and sat in their usual groups as they awaited their professor to arrive and start their lessons.

"Hey, I wonder what we're going to be learning in this class. It just has a room location and a teachers name on the timetable". Asked an astoundingly beautiful blonde-haired woman.

Her compatriots sitting next to her shrugged and murmured their shared confusion which was mirrored by the rest of the class. Suddenly with a bam! The door of the room exploded making the students jolt and reach for their tools. From the smoking smithereens of the door flame emerged a young man dressed casually in black jeans and a stylish grey jacket.

He walked to the front of the room under the slack jawed gaze off the students.

"Good morning, everyone I am Professor Black, and I have been bribed to teach you survival skills that would save your lives in the event of an apocalypse." The man said with a cheery smile.

While some were shocked by his calm demeanour and outlandish speech other twitched at the mention of survival skills. A large brown-haired boy boldly claimed, "I've already been taught survival skills by the best of the best, I'm here to learn how to kill monsters!".

This was met by nods and cheers of agreement from the class as the professor placed a bad down on his desk. He reached in and said loudly "I see! Well then survive this". Before pulling a gun off all things and shooting the brown-haired boy in the head.

The class jumped back in shock but none more so than the brown-haired boy sporting a red paint splatter in the centre off his forehead. The professor then made a buzzing noise with his mouth before announcing "you failed. Don't worry we'll go over what you did wrong in class."

The students were flabbergasted so chose to sit down whilst the brown-haired boy stood there frozen. Suddenly he shouted "you—YOU SHOT ME!?!?!"

"Indeed I did Mr….. Windbag?"

"It's Winchester!!! What the hell is wrong with you?!?!?"

"You said you had already learned survival skills, so I tested the most basic skill. You failed dodging."

Professor Black continued speaking in a calm and orderly tone whilst the young Winchester got angry, he reached for his side and pulled out a mace only for five bursting noises to echo out. His wrist, chin, shoulder, and forehead sported more red blotches. The Professor made another buzzing noise signifying failure. Rather than verbally admonish the boy he reached for his tablet and pulled up the roster.

"Jaune Arc?" "YES?!?" The slightly scared boy squealed in response making the professor stare blankly at him. "Normally you would reply with present sir! Not panicked questioning. Tut tut tut, it appears I must completely overhaul your whole education at this rate. Blake Belladonna?"

"Present sir" murmured out a smooth feminine voice. The Professor nodded and continued down the list of names and the class slowly calmed down and response to their names.

"Finally, Yang Xiao Long?" "Present sir~" answered the beautiful blonde girl in a relaxed member.

Rather than acknowledge her he stood up "excellent full attendance, that means a full pay check for this class. Anyway, as I mentioned I am here to teach you survival tips, my name is Mercury Black and I have been contracted to ensure you all don't die easily against the forces of Grimm and regular scumbags that you will inevitably deal with as hunters!"

Did you think this was Hogwarts? That I was Sirius Black or some original family member of his here to take over DADA for the year? Hah not a chance! I was inserted into Mercury when he turned 12 and his father gave him a nasty birthday beating. So, for four months I trained in secret, unlocked my aura and semblance then killed my dad in his sleep. Raided the black family of its wealth and supplies before disappearing and starting my career as a contract killer.

Got a degree in weapons engineering from Atlas OA and put my skills to work designing kick ass weapons which I used to kill various people. I sent in a nice little gift to Jacque Gele/Schnee and he unfortunately died within a short time frame. Next thing I know the ace ops bust in my door and I'm beating up some rooster speedster bitch. Things evolved from there to a race through Atlesian skies and a smooth (crash) landing in mantle.

So, I slip away into the alleys of Mantle and escape to Anima, kill some reputable bandits for their bounties and them I'm tracked down by some douche bag called Qrow, couldn't even spell his name right. Now I had no idea what world I was in, just that it was apocalyptic. I recognised that it may be a famous series off something when I fought a bitch who turned out to be some form of Avatar and killed her.

Next thing I know the greatest huntsman in Vale shows up with the ability to turn into a bird, that's not on his bio as a semblance off the forums. He was a main character of some degree and abused his plot armour to defeat me. At least that's my excuse for him barely managing to beat me, I get gassed and dragged to Vale where I met the old bastard Ozpin. He black mailed me into his services otherwise id be tossed to Atlas who want me for the alleged murders of several councilmen and unethical scientists. At least the pay is good, and the coffee is top shelf. My colleagues are also fun to be around for the most part, Glynda and Qrow are buzzkills.

Now I must teach the hunter hopefuls how to not die, Ozpin didn't care how I did that as long as its effective and he gets footage. I'm trying to determine the main character of this world and I think I just found her. Ruby Rose of team RWBY, you don't get a team named after yourself unless you're important to someone up top and they don't want to waste time setting up a macro to bring up their files on you.

Admitted earlier than everyone else, has a heavily modded weapon beyond the specs off the rest of the class, unique eye colour making my Naruto senses tingle, bodacious onee-san constantly smothering her with hugs, on the team with the rich bitch and an ex bad guy. Oh yeah, it's all coming together. Ozpin only has me teaching this year group and she is probably gonna get those avatar powers later. I refuse to call them maidens!

"Now then class, today I'm going to teach you the most valuable lesson any hunter in the world should know!"

The class leaned forward in anticipation "EVERYTHING CAN MECHA SHIFT" was written across the board making them all slump. The main character squealed into her hands and began Deku mumbling about an additional weapons class.

The white-haired girl I noted to be a Schnee raised her hand at me. "Yes Miss Schnee?"

"What do you mean everything van mechashift, how does this help us?" she asked haughtily. Others looked at me with dismissive gases or curious ones.

"Well Miss Schnee lets start with a hunters bread and butter! The weapons" I raised the paint ball gun and pushed a button turning it into a knife that was dripping paint from the tip. I hurled it at the celebrity of the class who caught it on instinct. Didn't save herself from paint splashing across her face. I made the buzzing noise "if that was a poison, acid, or a liquid dust combo you'd be dead. Always dodge don't grab Nikos".

I turned back to the Schnee and began listing examples "So weapons can mechashift obviously, next on the list is vehicles. Some can change their interior, some change their wheels to suit terrain, some can mechashift into submarines and I've even seen a car mechashift into an anti-air turret before."

Some in the class nodded at that and began taking down notes and listing their own examples from memory.

"Next is people mechashifting" I said regaining their attention before I raised my leg and pulled the sleeves down. Yeah, I'm an amputee but I'm also armed to the teeth and don't give a fuck, try and discriminate I dare you!

"Several off you may know some older huntsmen, some would have prosthetics capable of mechashift. Some criminals willingly become cyborgs for the extra fire power, and I know some rich assholes who have had organs replaced with more mechanical and efficient ones that can change."

Weiss mumbled about her mother's liver under her breath whilst I continued "further building on that is animals mechashifting! If a human\Faunus can be upgraded why can't their pets. You ever seen a cat spit out acid hair balls? Not fun I can tell you." That earned some grimaces from the class. Anyone ever seen Kingsman, the second one had a bad guy with mech dogs. I had to see some shit like that in Atlas.

"Everyday household items can mechashift, always be on guard. Allow me to provide an example!" I said before pulling out a lazy boy recliner chair and plopping myself on it. The chair sprouted to gatling guns from the arm rests that pointed at the class earning more shocked looks. I laughed and announced it wasn't loaded…. Yet.

"Lastly Miss Schnee even the terrain can mechashift"

Cardin Winchester scoffed "those were all extreme examples that aren't likely to happen to us. Outside the Vytal festival when is the room gonna change like that? Also, the chair is probably a one of a kind thing." His teammates laughed alongside him while I just stared silently.

I smirked "You know, I think this is another opportunity for me to test your survival skills Mr Winchester and an excellent opportunity to showcase a changing terrain." I then walked over to a corner and revealed a lever and pulled it down harshly.

The transformers changing sound effect echoed out as the seat the students sat on slammed together. Yelps echoed out as the classroom began changing into a bus and my desk became the driver's seat.

"Welcome to the battle bus ladies and gents, today I'm going to see how you handle being dropped in the middle of the emerald forest. Strap in for the bumpy ride!" and without waiting for anyone's opinions I drove my new battle bus through the wall of the castle and straight off the cliff into the forest.

The class was screaming except for Miss Valkyrie who was manically cackling, and Mr lie who was grasping his seat for dear life. Miss Rose has shining eyes as the bus entered a free fall into the Grimm infested forest.

Up in the clock tower the other teachers had gathered to watch Mr Black's first lesson. Glynda looked like she was going to have a heart attack, Peter Port announced that he refused to be outdone and shall make his next class into an equally as exciting hunt, Dr Oobleck ranted about the mechanics behind changing a classroom into the bus and he pondered aloud how I had the time to do it. The headmaster just slurped on his coffee enjoying the screams of his students. He mentally patted himself on the back for finding another excellent staff member.