14. I Just Called To Say I love You.

I switched to America myself and went to a Pennsylvania mansion for a change, didn't go to any missions, and didn't actually do any flea work other than the obligatory trip to Lake Lanier and wrote everyone's names down again. My new plaque was very pretty and my eyes were wet with tears as I carved those names. This was the hardest time ever to carve those names, to say a little prayer for them, and ask their forgiveness, even though I knew I hadn't deserved it.

I had been too nice not to order everyone to gear up properly, even though the gear would have been uncomfortable and cumbersome. It might save lives. But I do not know to know it, as those bullets had been experimental and even Murdock had not heard about them, so he could not say if even Magnum's new gear would have been enough. My mind was still full of self-blame and bitterness, but the loss of Jake was still deep within and I would not handle it, not at all. That feeling would be too much, even for me. 

It was better not to feel. This was one culmination point of my life. It made harder, distant at times and not wanting to share. I kept my feelings to myself, not anyone else. Of course I had now love in my love again, but loss as well and hard feelings were those that I suppressed, not dealt them.

I ordered flowers, gift baskets and I went to visit their families, and Jake's son was six at the time and didn't understand why daddy didn't come home anymore. Their little daughter would never hear her father's voice or be with him, just because I robbed him of them.

What was most striking was Jake's wife. She was no taller than I, slender, blonde and we could have been sisters, almost. She told me straight away that she didn't blame me; it is what it is, and this was the way that Jake wanted to go, on the mission. She told me she knew how much I meant to Jake, yet she still loved him and was married to him. Even her husband loved someone else even more than his children.

Then she gave me a few boxes Jake had ordered for me to be given. His journals and there was a letter addressed to me, too. I did not open it. It was hard enough for me to receive these. She had never read these, or she wanted even. She had loved Jake; she loved their children, and she was not bitter at all.

She told me that sometimes when Jake had to deal with me all the time, the same thing was going into the house and Jake would order her to eat too, and sleep too. She had to remind him she was not supernatural and that with her metabolism, she would gain quite a bit of weight. She told me how she noticed that sometimes Jake brought work to home but then again, when we had had our victories, a really good gig, Jake had been so happy, and for a long time too. 

I visited each of the fallen families, talked with them, giving those baskets to them. Drinking coffee and reminiscing about these guys. No one blamed me. I didn't tell them how they had died, not exactly, only that Sark was the blame and it ignited so many of them to seek revenge or some kind of justice. I could not offer any assurance that justice would prevail, as I knew how nasty the enemy Sark was.

All I could tell then was that I would remember those names, those people always and forever as I was immortal, and with my memory, it was just my burden to bear. I told them I have a secret place where I have memorial plagues of those who are lost in action, and the names of their loved ones are in those plaques. 

After my long and hard trip, the trip had shattered my heart, almost; I tried to remember to start to live. Even though I lost Jake, and Damon divorced from me, I had gained Adam and Charles and for those boys; I needed to live, to perk up and start to see sunshine again in this dreadful, dark place that was called a world. I permitted myself to be happy, to smile, and not to blame myself all the time, as it would not help anyone or anything at all. 

After I got back to Pennsylvania, I started to learn how to live again. Now I wanted to do something new, nice and find new stuff, buy stuff, and have fun with Mimosa and Mirella, too. I looked at my flowers. I had a huge greenhouse in there, my orchids and other pretty ones, too. 

I started shopping and buying clothes and stuff. Then I found the fairs again. I started looking for different fairs I could always go to, and then I went with Mimosa to the aquarium fair. We stayed there the whole day. The result was 2000 liter tanks in most of our houses, lots of fish, plants, and everything; apparently, I was going to go aquarium shopping.

I didn't mind because Mimosa was happy, and she was angry with Damon and swore revenge on him occasionally. Damon was history, what it came to me. I had moved on, ready to be in love and have one Charles Cornick in my life, and properly so.

Mimosa had her problems with Damon. She knew we had a long hard time before the divorce and she just felt that Damon betrayed us utterly. I didn't care, and when I told her what we did in the sauna with Adam and Charles and our week together too, Mimosa's voice changed quite a lot on the bell. Now she was curious and wanted to taste those men herself.

A few days later, I received a call from Charles, who had now gotten Adam's permission to look at my finances. He was quite strict with them and asked a lot of questions and there came a lot of demands that had to be met. It was just a good thing that Charles took care of my money, and I had to give all the stocks, jewels, and valuables to the master.

Adam took all the guns. He knew also about my safety deposit boxes and that I had more or less quite a wonderful selection of firearms in the house. Most of my houses anyway, but as they had been my guns, my armories, no other good get in there. Adam wanted to change that, too. He arranged for a gun safe in every house, and I had been going through the safe deposit boxes now and then, so I had a few stashes here and there, and I didn't remember to give everything away.

Cars would be one item to be checked out too and Adam wanted to have a decent armory in every house, so I had to be ready to supply those guns, Charles had his own preferences when it came to guns and I was almost directing these guys to Murdock or Magnum to get guns they wanted, almost but I had what they needed too. 

When the men had originally returned two weeks later with Samuel and Bran, Charles and Samuel were furious, and Bran was so fucking pleased. Bran had once again, gotten himself pushed in some way in the lives of his boys, and not with excellent results.

Bran said to me. "I've given Charles and Samuel a marrok order not to fuck with you, little girl, then try to develop a relationship. I still know my son well enough that the feeling will soon wear off when you don't get any pussy." 

I looked at Bran and said, "Well, let's just see about it. You don't really know your son, or you don't love him. You love just your power over him and push him far enough, and then one day you see he is much stronger than you think. I hate you, I really do and I hope that from this day on, every heat I have, will be like that, so you can't take part in it, Samuel here can say and tell you a lot of my willpower so don't be upset when you notice that this will be true. "

My voice was venomous, and no one stopped me. Bran looked at me for a while, just to think can I really make my heat like it, then he just scoffed to show me he didn't take me seriously.

I said to him, "Well, no penetration. You mean but being with someone, means so much more than just raw sex, but feeling, true feelings are something you don't have in your soul at all. Do you Bran? By the way, feel this."

I put little more oomph our mating bond with Charles, so Bran felt it. His expression was pretty furious as it had been pretty pure love that i had sent to Charles. Love is strongest force in universe. I remembered what Wulfe had once told me, more or less told me love whoever I wanted. 

He walked away. Charles came to me, kissed me widely, and said, "No one, honey, no one had ever dared to talk to Bran like that. I do love you. No matter what he says and just like you said, this gives me so excellent motivation to push against his power, to break that order. I love you too, my love."

I kissed him back. We were so much more than just plain sex. He sent me to his love for me and then i had to sent my love to Adam, got his transmission as well. Charles wasn't discouraged. Just because we didn't fuck didn't stop us from being creative. We kissed, we did the job with our mouths, or we both did the job and kissed while we did it. We'd been together for three months since I woke up. And then Mimosa got in heat, and I had to go into exile.

In all these years that Charles has been in my life, it has always been different with him than what it is with Damon. Damon seduced me, right off the bat, from the start, but Charles saved me. He and Adam were my pillars of support after that world-saving tour, after losing Jake, and they have been ever since. Neither of them is perfect. They have made their mistakes too, not always being fair to me, but I have learned over my many centuries that my relationships with these will be always unique just because our start differed from Mine and Damon's. And this is one thing that Damon struggles the most. He wants to be my everything, but he is not. He is, though, Mariella's everything. 

I returned to our house in Calgary and remembered how horny Damon and I had been, but he now has a vampire wife who understands all things vampire, which gave me the idea. Fine, I need to start being more of a vampire. Mirella gave me some kind of power training, but somehow, she didn't tell me everything. So fine, I decided to take the boys to a party. I asked a lot of vampire books from fleas and those gave me a complete library of them.

Same with Reddington and I had many lovely lunches with him. He had his sense of humor, but we had some interesting theories. If Damien is truly no part of Damon, what he will do to Maggie? As she is not likely so a good victim and if Damon wants to be a vampire, maybe Damien is being suppressed all the time. But when I told Reddington, how Damien told me about making a living doll out of a vampire woman, I could not help to think that could he do it to Maggie too. 

I told Reddington about some new things in my life too. I did not tell him about the Group rape that I went through at the hands of Bran or a detailed version of how I lost Jake and others; I mentioned I was in a coma for three months just because I had driven myself in a too terrible state, so I am not always very wise what it came to my health. I told him about my feline side too, and he promised to look into it and he was for me like a father, almost. There was something very protective of his behavior over me, and I accepted it. I seemed to collect men in my life to protect me and care for me. 

I told him what Wulfe had told me, and how it had actually helped me. And what was most weird, was his little smile. Like he would had knew something or suspect something but did not tell me. I told him how I like to hiss sometimes, or purr, or climb up in safety if I am sick. He assured me that if he would ever have to encounter me as sick, there would be army of nurses to keep me in bed, no climbing what so ever.

Reddington told me I was very important to him and it was very rare for him to get emotional. But he also told me he has his ways of hearing things, certain rumors, and knowledge about Marrok too and I could see that he was not happy, but he almost waited for me to permit him to go after Bran. Well, maybe sometime. He was doing a lot of stuff ready to damage Bran, but I told him about a lot of stuff. It was good to share, too.

I also told him about the recent change that Adam and Charles had gone through almost right before Mimosa heat had started. I was not sure how it had happened. I mean, with Ruby it had been a whole different story, but with these, well, I had turned both of them in some way into vampires. 

They'd both been my blood banks for the whole three months and one morning, I woke up to Charles looking at me funny, and then he attacked me and sank his fangs into my neck. He'd become a vampire, and before I knew it, Adam had his fangs on the other side of me. They drank me dry, several times, and they were very excited to be vampires.

Oh, double vampires, this is going to be interesting. Mirella was nervous when the men became vampires. They were hybrids like me. Samuel watched my feline hormones closely, but they stayed in check. We did not fuck, not really, so it was not so stimulating for me.

Samuel said, "Salvatore is the key word there, so if you see another shapeshifter, they can go up, but they should go down because the stimulus is not full time."

So I left the vampire boys to fiddle with my wolf and went to plan our first public appearance. We need something that's just ours and that I'm sure no one else has. Mimosa's heat would be very interesting as he had now two fresh vampires with a healthy bloodlust and sex drive to go with it. Yet another thing that breaks those two from under Bran even more. There was nothing he could do. Nothing at all. 

I had a few vampiric ideas. Firstly, I had dresses. I was trying them on one day, and I had this gorgeous bright red leather dress with a decorative chain belt, but because I was so slim, and this belt had to be tight, making the ends hang down. It looked just sloppy if I let it hang on my hips and if I put it tight enough; it looked like a dog leash wrapped around me. Hmm---leash? An idea started to form. I remembered Magnum's little leash that he had put in me. Let's turn that into fashion. Not collar and leash, but belt and chain. Perfect.

I moved the belt so that the ends of the chains were on either side of me and lifted them in the air. Hmm, the idea started to take shape even more. I'm sure no one else has a system like this, as long as I can just get it done. This little bitch will be under control and everyone sees I am truly a little bitch. I remembered the club, my leash, and my collar, but this time, we would make a fashion statement out of this. 

I called a couple of friends who could do metalwork, took a couple of dresses with me, and bought more chain belts. When I told them my idea, they would get them made. That would be perfect. I wandered around the shops. Finding all of my accessories, to Mirella and Mimosa too. We would make an impact as a pack, pack of hybrids.

And quite quickly, too. Mimosa's frenzy, that's when we'd run out, we'd start going through parties, vampire, werewolf, shapeshifter, all of them. This would make a fantastic show. We certainly wouldn't be forgotten for long. We would make statements throughout vampire circles, werewolf, and shifter circles, too. 

I bought lots of belts, and for the men, leather pants and satin shirts, silk shirts, I didn't make them wear them, but I could imagine how great-looking men I would have. I had never bought much of clothes for Damon, first, because of a few little in-house sessions, and little teachings that should not brag my money and buy his clothes for him and second, he had his clothes usually with him, not sure where he got them from, but he got them. Being a divorce comes with its perks. It was lovely to be free of certain things, like long red hair.

Now, I had bright blue hair, not short but straight; I changed my hair color as Mirella taught me long ago. Mirella and I made food. She was not part of the heat now, and she was a little hesitant about my plan, but decided to go along with it when I said she and Mimosa would be at the party, too. I had studied a lot of vampire fashion and whatnot, so I knew what was in and what was out. 

I had made clips for the men to put the end of my belt on. I would be attached to both men, or they would be attached to me. Mimosa had a collar with a similar system so that she would be attached to Mirella. We would be new generation of vampires. As Damon had taken vampire divorce from me, I was no longer Lady salvatore but Little Bitch, Wildcat, whoever I wanted to be.