Singularity Briefing

"So er... learning from our mistakes last time, Chaldea's higher command has elected t-"

"Isn't that just you and Olga though?" Nicholas held up a hand, leaning back in his reclining chair.

Last he'd checked, mos-... no wait, ALL of Chaldea's higher authority had been blasted to kingdom come by Lev bin Laden... wait what?

No.

Lev Lainur, yeah, that was the one.

It was the whole reason he had a vendetta against the 72 Demon Faggots, most of whom probably looked like Disney rejects, and their twink King.

"That's the point." Romani wiped his forehead with a napkin, "But somehow, I feel even more threatened with just the Masters here?"

It was at this point that Nicholas decided to have another look around the central command room.

Olga stood a bit to Romani's side with crossed arms, scrutinising all of them with golden eyes while the Doctor himself fumbled around with stacks of documents, trying to find something. Da Vinci was tinkering with the big screen behind them.

Nicholas himself was sitting on the reclining chair he'd carried over from his 'living' room, Yu was leaning against the wall all edgy and stuff, eyes fixed on the book in her hand... And Gudako... well he didn't know what happened to Gudako.

She was just staring at Romani.

That was probably what was making the guy so nervous now that he thought about it.

Those big orange eyes... they were, they were so hollow and empty...

"What happened, Doctor? Tell us about the singularity." She spoke to Romani calmly, but in a tone that deeply unsettled even Nicholas and he wasn't scared of nobody, she reminded him of the vague memories he had of the time he was roofied, "Come on, tell us."

"Y...Yes, of course."

Yeah, he kinda understood why Romani was so nervous out of nowhere.

The good doctor cleared his throat to orient himself before nodding firmly, "We'd identified the next singularity early on, it was somewhere during the rule of Emperor Nero bu-"

"Is Nero a hot chick to-?" Nicholas was cut off by Yu flinging her book right at the back of his head.

"Are women all you think about?!"

"Chill bitch, I was just fucking around." He narrowed his gaze in a way that promised vengeance, "Besides, I already know Nero a chick. She the OG umu gal."

"...Does anybody understand what he's even saying half the time?" Gudako mechanically turned to look at the two A-Team Masters like she crawled out of the Exorcist, making them both jerk and then recoil in sync.

Of course as someone whose two brain cells each only corresponded to his right and left fists, Nicholas was threatened for the first time in his life and immediately got defensive.

"You wanna throw down? I... I ain't afraid to square up."

"What's wrong with you?" The red haired girl tilted her head in genuine confusion, "I just asked a question."

"...Am I losing my marbles?"

"No." Yu walked over and put a hand on his shoulder, "I... I felt that too... not as Hinako."

If a who knows how many millennia old Immortal felt threatened then there really was something wrong.

Fortunately or unfortunately, Olga interrupted by loudly clearing her throat, "You can decide who's more insecure later, Romani, go ahead with the briefing."

"You know, I'm just starting to realise that these kids are... well they're more dangerous than anything we could manage." Romani commented meekly, "Anyway, we only had the general gist like last time but when Nicholas attacked SHEBA, it started working and gave us much more."

"Huh? It worked?" Yu asked curiously.

"Yeah it did." Da Vinci gave her a defeated smile, "Unfortunately, that just made the 21st century's greatest genius conclude it only worked because it was a ploy by the Demon Gods."

Nicholas chortled, "Damn right it was. You really expect me to believe something made by Lev wasn't gonna blow back in our faces? And besides, don't you think it's a huge coincidence that it works the second we choose to wreck it?"

Yes, Nicholas had attacked the SHEBA system with Artoria's sword, wrecked it once and by some 'miracle' the feed it provided of the past cleared up completely... That definitely wasn't because it had sentience and worked as a spy or some shit for Lev... right?

Yeah.

It just didn't line up right.

So of course, he did the only sane thing to do and destroyed it completely, wrecking the damned thing beyond recognition.

"I mean... it's not exactly implausible but..." Da Vinci admitted slowly, "You could have at least let me try to reverse engineer the technology."

Nicholas chortled again, answering her sarcastically, "Yeah, sure. Go back to fiddling with dolls and walking around naked, fucking pervert."

""...""

The genius inventor hailed as omnipotent in all fields shrunk under the sudden scrutiny of everyone in the room, "W-What? Is it so wrong to be proud of my work?!

"Wait no, if you a genius. Why ain't you figured out how to fix up the rest of the team? The damage was minimal right?"

"...I... I'm trying but I have to do maintenance and everything... we're understaffed. Maybe if you summoned a doctor or something?" Da Vinci offered quietly, racking all the different gears in her brain, "Or maybe someone like Nikola Tesla? Or Thomas Edison? We could whip up something..."

Nicholas paused for a bit, considering the request, "Sure, I'll try."

He definitely wasn't going to just spam and hit the FATE system till it gave him the guys he wanted.

"Oh oh, for Tesla, use an electrical cord or something as a catalyst. I'll give you one."

"Alrig-"

"EHEM! Can we please return to the topic at hand?! As in... THE EXISTENTIAL THREAT TO HUMANITY?!" Olga had to interrupt them again, visibly annoyed by the lackadaisical attitudes of what was essentially humanity's last hope.

"...Chill."

"Director, you're gonna pop a vein or something at this rate."

"And besides, we should focus on resuscitating the rest of A-Team too. It would raise the chances of success."

"...Shut up and listen to the briefing." Olga shut them all down strictly, "Anybody else speaks out, I'm docking Nicholas' pay."

"Wut? This sum corporate abuse type shit."

"Do something about it." Olga smirked at him with crossed arms.

"But eh... seeing you tryna be all serious is cute in it's own way."

"J-Just shut up!"

Needless to say, everyone shut up after that.

Mostly because they knew Nicholas would punch whoever came between him and his green.

"Right, so, another empi-"

"Don't spoil my adventure man, not cool."

Nicholas spoke up anyway, sending a faint smirk Olga's way before standing up.

"Brief the others, I'll just wing it. I ain't listening to nerds rambling."

"...Nerd. I'm not a nerd... this is my job."

"You hypnotised yourself into forgetting the truth about your streamer idol or something, you're not just a nerd. You one of those sweaty nerds that breath heavy."

With those words, Chaldea's strongest Master sauntered out of the briefing.

"I'll just tell him what's necessary as it comes up." Yu cut Olga off as soon as the woman opened her mouth, "Him leaving lets people who were actually gonna listen, listen."

"But it's no-"

"Be real, if you make him stay... He's just gonna tune everything out and then be petty enough to tune us out when we try to tell him something." Yu explained again, putting her understanding of the Neanderthal mind on full display, "Even if he does, somehow, listen... He's probably going to ignore the plan and run around doing what he likes anyway."

-

"Oh hey, what you up to Marie?"

The French Monarch looked up to meet his gaze before looking around to see if there was anyone else in the corridor. She gestured for him to lean down and Nicholas did, curious about what she wanted, "Do you want me to knight you?"

"Where'd that come from?" Nicholas tilted his head confused.

"For protecting my people and my nation? And er... so I can order you to take a break as your Queen? I heard you lost your friends too... It's not very healthy to distract yourself by running around all the time, Nick."

The pale haired teenager stared at the girl in silence for a few moments before a faint smile formed on his face, "Thanks for worrying but I'm good... I'm gonna get my due sooner or later."

"Alright then, how about spending today like a noble? It would be a change... And I think you'd enjoy it."

Nicholas paused again.

It sounded fun to go around like a Brit noble.

"...Sure, I'm in."

"Hm hm, nice!" Marie smiled happily and held out a hand, "Well then, let us go, 'Lord' Nicholas Martel. You shall be my escort for the day."

"Aight."

"No... You say, 'If it would please you, my lady.' Because I'm the Queen. And then you gently take my hand."

"...Get yo ass outta here bi-" Nicholas forcibly shut his mouth with a hand. Marie was too pure for that, as he'd come to see, "I-...If it would please you, my lady."

...It seemed fun but he got the faint feeling he was going to regret it for some reason.

Oh wait, no, nevermind, that was the spicy tacos Martha made for him.

-

Hope you enjoyed the chapter.

A bit iffy in my head, last one too... I think it's the MTL CNs I was reading.