Chapter 10

Now there were the hours and hours I spent just with Kerry and especially our “date,” which I felt our dinner on Saturday amounted to. I realized that any attraction I felt towards Eileen was attraction I felt for Kerry.

I knew I was gay. I knew when I was in high school. Not that I ever acted on it. I just enjoyed the way girls, and especially not the tall, sleek distances runners with whom I spent so much time, looked. I saw nothing of interest in the boys in my classes. And my regular porn habits—severely restricted while home—always tended to the lesbian. If I ever viewed straight porn it was once or twice to see what it was about and it was never repeated.