Barely Breathing

I thought it would be easier. I can't believe I thought it would be easier to know that my first love died, I died. Everyone risked their lives for me. I took people from their families. The torment of my everyday life.

I just decide to try and carry on with life. Go back to normal, be myself. It's easier said than done. I walk into my school with all the torturing memories visible, playing out as if it were only yesterday. Bombs, messages and saving my brother's butt. It is torture to see it replay. To remember I didn't only lose myself, but that car crash destroyed everything. My innocence, my conscience, my life, my family, other people's family. If only I died than none of this would've happened.