Devil 21: Do I have to Cry for you

Jack's Pov

"Gawin mo kung ano ang gusto mo. Ligawan mo ako kung gusto mo, parusahan mo ako kung gusto mo, pero wag na wag mong pakikialaman ang relasyon ko kay Heart. Dahil kahit may nangyari na satin hindi parin magbabago ang nararamdaman ko kay Heart."

"Will you spare her from your stupid deal?"

"I'm sorry Jack, pero hilingin mo na ang lahat wag lang ang layuan si Heart."

Paulit ulit na umeeco sa utak ko ang mga katagang binitiwan ni Natsu noon.

Pinangarap kong makaramdam ulit ako pero hindi ko alam na ang sakit pala kapag nasasaktan ang tumitibok na puso.

Akala ko nung una ay unti unti nang nagigising ang wargon sa loob ko kaya kung ano anong sakit na ang nararamdaman ko but James told me that it was normal for a normal human to feel that way when they feel hurt by someone they love.

And yes. I think I love Natsu that much that's why I felt that kind of pain in my heart.

At dahil sa nangyari samin ni Natsu, my whole body heated up and it's dangerous for me and for all the people near me coz I almost wake the wargon inside my body.

Kaya naman, muli akong pumasok sa tube glass to freeze my body and my organs for a month at hindi na dapat maulit pa ang nangyari samin ni Natsu dahil napakadelikado.

Maaring hindi ko sila nagising ngayon pero paano sa susunod?

At sa loob ng isang buwang iyon ay hindi ko pa nakita si Natsu. I only collect info to Andy kapag pumapasok sya.

Hindi ko na rin naririnig ang mga iniisip nya. Something change in my power when I gave myself to him. I can't hear him and I can't feel him anymore. Even I had his necklace.

I wonder if he already figure it out na nawawala ang necklace nya.

It sounds like, my power increase to others but it has differenf effect on him.

Alam kong una palang ay hindi na talaga sya nasasagap ng radar ko pero nang makakuha ako ng bagay na galing sa kanya ay saka ko sya naramdaman.

Pero nang may maganap samin ay biglang bumalik sa dati ang radar ko. I can't reach him anymore.

I can't predict him and I can't even know if he's near or far from me.

And there's one more thing I can't understand after we made love...

He can remember what we did even I already erased his memories of that night.

And now I feel like I'm missing him. I want to see him so bad. But I need to distance myself from him. Dahil may iba akong nararamdaman kapag nasa malapit lang sya.

Umiinit ang katawan ko at baka matunaw na naman ako at tuluyan nang magising ang wargon sa loob ko.

I need to stay away from him. But before that, I want to do something for him that will gonna wake him up from trusting that girl.

That girl he said he loves dearly.

That girl he chosed to be with than me.

Napatiim bagang ako nang mamataan ang taong sinusundan ko na lumabas ng kanyang condo.

Magkasabay silang naglakad ng kanyang kasama sa parking lot saka sumakay ng kotse nito. They kissed and savour each others desire bago umalis ng building.

Napabuntong hininga ako saka napasandal sa headboard ng sasakyan.

I'm thinking about Natsu. I know he will get hurt if he knew about this.

The fact that the girl he loves the most will never be his coz she is already committed to someone else.

--

I drove home and headed to the lab. I saw James at his monitor and lab equipment trying to test something.

"Jack you're here." Bati niya.

Tiningnan ko lang sya saka hinubad ang aking jacket.

"I need to see them." I commanded him.

Sandali siyang natigilan saka ako nilingon.

"Now?"

"Yes."

Napabuntong hininga siya saka inalis ang makapal na salamin sa mata at nagtungo sa isang steel door.

Sinundan ko naman sya at hinintay na buksan ang pinto.

"They're not fully fixed coz I still have something to plant in their brain to make them work properly but I think they can recognize you now." Aniya.

Nang bumukas ang pinto ay agad akong pumasok at sumunod naman sya.

Naglakad ako palapit sa malaking glass room at pinanood ang dalawang lalaki na waring seryosong nag uusap.

Nang mapansin nila na may nanonood sa kanila ay mabilis silang napalingon sakin at waring nagulat na makita ako.

Agad silang napatayo at bahagyang yumukod sa harap ko.

"Master." Pagbati nila na para bang nagbibigay pugay sa kanilang D'yos.

They are the two guys from Natsu's enemy that night. They were dead as I took their body at the field but now they looked like a normal person like they were used to be.

James frozed their body and planted the brain of the two shadow hunter in their head. And now, they are nothing but my minions who will praise and follow all my command.

"Are you ready for your first mission?" Tanong ko sa kanila.

"Yes master!"

****

"Jack?" Tawag ni Andy at bahagyang kumatok sa pinto ko.

Hindi ko sya nilingon bagkus ay nagfocus lang ako sa wall monitor at pinanood ang gagawin ng dalawa kong tauhan.

I order them to stalk and collect pictures of that girl with her partner. I want it to be slow. Much as I want to kill them but it would bring shocked to Natsu if I do that. So, I'm planning to busted them in front of Natsu's eyes for him to see what he has missing out.

Andy walked towards me and sit beside me.

"What?" I asked.

"Have you injected your vitamins?" She asked too.

"Yes."

"Can you double it?"

I look at her with frowning face.

"I just wanna make sure." She said while can't look straight to me.

I can sense something in her. But I guess it's not that bad.

"Why do I have to do that? I'm perfectly fine." I said and look back to monitor.

"No, I insist Jack. Coz you have to do something tonight."

Muli akong napalingon sa kanya.

"What is it?" I stare at her.

Pero sa halip na sumagot ay tumayo siya at nagtungo sa cabinet kung saan naroon ang mga wargon blood na syang vitamins ko.

Kumuha sya ng isang tube at nilagay sa syringe.

Wala syang imik na bumalik at sumenyas na tuturukan ako.

Bahagya akong naglean to expose my neck to her. I know she knows what to do. Siguro may importante syang ipapagawa na ako lang ang pwedeng gumawa.

Matapos niya akong turukan ay napabuntong hininga muna sya at inayos ang syringe na ginamit sakin.

"Tell me now. What do I have to do?"

"Something came up. Zero needs you at-!"

"What?!" Bulalas ko.

Ramdam kong bigla akong nataranta sa sinabi nya.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner? Where is he?" Singhal ko sa kanya at mabilis na nagbihis.

"Ahmm, ano..kasi.."

"For God's sake Andy!" I scolded her.

"Nasa school sya. Sa gym at-!"

I didn't finished her as I stormed out my room at mabilis na tinawag si Raygun.

Agad kong pinaharurot ang motor ko papunta sa school.

Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit, pero bigla kong naramdaman na umiinit ang pisngi ko.

I'm wearing my stunt suit at wala na akong pakialam kung hindi na normal ang tibok ng puso ko ang mahalaga ay mapuntahan ko kaagad si Natsu.

If something happens to him. I swear I will never forgive myself.

Pagdating sa school ay halos kukunti nalang ang mga estudyante. Mostly are those student that has a position in the school.

Tapos na rin ang practice ng mga game. Isang linggo nalang ay interhigh na. I didn't pick any sport to play with coz I'm gonna be unfair to any of them.

I hurriedly headed to the gym and look for Natsu.

Ngunit malayo pa lang ako sa gym ay naririnig ko na ang usapan ng ilang naroon.

They're nervous for something I don't know.

Hindi ko nalang sila pinansin bagkus ay iginala ko ang aking paningin sa paligid.

I can't sense Natsu's presence pero alam kong narito lang sya.

"Nandyan na sya!"

"Okay, magready na kayo."

"Boss, nandito na hinihintay natin!"

Sari saring boses ang naririnig ko ngunit hindi ko marinig ang taong hinahanap ko at nang makarating ako sa gate ng gym ay pabalya ko itong sinipa at tuloy tuloy na pumasok sa loob ngunit napahinto ako at natigilan sa nakita.

There's a purple carpet at puno ng balloons ang paligid. Purple and peach balloons. Iba iba rin ang hugis nito. There's a circle, heart shape, and there's also shape like animals. Dog, birds and etc.

In every corner of the gym was full of flowers.

White and red flowers.

There's also a petals on the carpet and it looks like someone prepared it for somebody's special.

I see no one on the stage but I can feel the presence of everyone in every corner of the gym. They're hiding and talking each other on how they will going to unhide theirselves.

What's happening here? Where's Natsu?

Hindi ko nalang sana papansinin ang mga decorations at akmang aalis na sana ako sa gitna ng carpeted floor when someone played guitar in the corner of the stage.

Kunot noong napatingin ako rito para lang magulat sa nakita.

Natsu was strumming his guitar while looking at me.

Napaawang ang labi ko at di makapaniwala sa ginagawa nya.

I get confused dahil baka inihanda nya ito para sa babaeng mahal nya.

At sa isiping iyon ay parang may kung anong bagay ang tumarak sa dibdib ko.

Napakurap ako saka akmang aalis na nang marinig ko syang magsalita.

"Salamander..."

Natigilan ako.

He called me right? He's the only one who calls me that name. And I'm the only one he's calling by that name.

Dahan dahan akong napalingon sa kanya. Meron na syang mga kasama sa stage at nagsisimula na ring tumugtog at sumabay sa gitara nya.

"...sabi mo sakin noon. Na gusto mong kantahan kita para lang marinig ko sayo na namimis mo ako. Tsh." Aniyang bahagyang natawa.

"H'wag ka munang umalis. Gusto kong marinig mo ang kakantahin ko. Minsan ko lang gagawin 'to kaya magpasalamat ka at ikaw ang unang babaeng kakantahan ko with effort like this."

Napataas ang kilay ko sa sinabi nya.

What the hell is he doing? Is he going to serenade me? Tss.

Natsu, Natsu, Natsu...

Hindi ko alam kung anong tawag sa nararamdaman ko pero pakiramdam ko kinikiliti ang puso ko.

"This song is just for you, sana magustuhan mo." Medyo nahihiyang sabi nya pa saka napakagat labi.

Muli siyang nag strum ng guitar at sinabayan naman sya ng ilan nyang kasama.

(Do I have to Cry for you - by Nick Carter)

Don't wanna close the door..

Don't wannna give up on it...

Don't wanna fight no more..

We'll find a way around it..

Where's the love we had

We can make it last..

He's a good singer. I already heard that song, and it was like he's the original singer or should I say he's far more than that.

Tell me what I gotta be,

Tell me what you wanna do

Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you

Do I have to cry for you?

He looked at me like he was literally asking me that question.

Does he need to cry? For what? I want him to be happy not to cry just for my apology.

So tell me what it's for.

If there's no winner in it?

Nobody's keeping score

Let's start from the beginning

He step down from the stage and headed my way while continue singing and strumming his guitar.

Can we make it last

Where's the love we had

Tell me what I gotta be,

Tell me what you wanna do

Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you

Do I have to cry for you?

Now he's standing in front of me na para bang kinakausap ako.

And I am attempted to touch him and kiss him.

He became more beautiful to me as he strum hard on his guitar and sang the high notes.

Do I gotta stand in the cold dark night

Till the morning light, yeah

Do I have to say?

I won't let you get away

He looked at me as if he's asking me those question in the song.

What do I gotta be,

Tell me what you wanna do

Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you

Yeah..

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah

Oh no

He's smiling while eyes closed as he sang those notes like he wants to feel the song he was singing about. And when he opened his eyes it was directly looking at me.

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you..?

He stopped strumming his guitar and let it hanging on his body.

He move closer to me and held my face.

Awang ang mga labi kong nakatingin lang sa kanya.

Do I have to cry for you...?

Pagtatapos nya ng kanta habang titig na titig sakin.

Tapos na syang kumanta ngunit nanatili parin kaming nakatayo lang sa gitna at nakatitig sa isa't isa.

I want to kiss him, hug him and feel him.

At bigla ko nalang naramdam ang pag iinit ng katawan ko.

My body is started to melt again.

I can't be with him.

This is not good. Being near him is not good.

Natsu..

"Jack.. I... I'm sorry for being a jerk. I know I hurt you when I said those words to you after what happened to us. And I'm sorry if I avoided you after that day."

He's being sorry for what he did?

Oh Natsu.. Please stop it.. I might lose control if you continue this...this sweet treatment and soft apology..

I already forgive you.

I want to tell him that but I can't find my voice as if I was muted just because he's in front of me.

"I hope we can be friends after this moment. I don't want to fight with you anymore. I.. I...please consider me as your friend coz I.. I want to know you more."

He bit his lips as he looked at me hoping for my positive answer.

I want to give him that coz I want him to be happy.

I opened my mouth to say something when I heard my shadow hunter talk to my earphone.

"Master, that girl is under the slavery of a sadist tycoon Jillian together with her lover."

"What?!"

****

Zero's Pov

"I hope we can be friends after this moment. I don't want to fight you anymore. I.. I...please consider me as your friend coz I.. I want to know you more."

T*angina ang lakas na ng kaba ko ah. Sana lang talaga hindi ako tanggihan ni Jack.

Dahil tiyak na pagtatawanan ako ng mga hinayupak kong tauhan kapag pinahiya nya ako.

Napakagat labi pa ako at hinintay syang sumagot.

Please Jack, sorry na..let's not fight anymore. I want to be your friend now.

Bumuka ang bibig nya na kanina ko pa gustong halikan at parang may gustong sabihin ngunit bigla siyang natigilan.

"What?!" Galit na bulalas niya na sya namang kinagulat ko.

Shit! Muntik na akong atakihin dun ah! Pero teka, galit ba sya? Pero bakit..?

"J-jack...w-why..? May nasabi ba akong masama? H-hindi mo ba nagustuhan ang ginawa ko? I thought you want me to sing a song for you." Tarantang sabi ko dahil bigla na namang umitim ang mga mata nya. Ibig sabihin nagagalit na naman sya. Dahil kaya sa ginawa ko?

Tiningnan nya lang ako na para bang may gusto syang sabihin ngunit hindi nalang sya umimik at bigla nalang syang ngumisi na katulad nung sinipa nya ako sa dibdib.

"You're not a good singer Ezequil Zeroin. And what you did to me was unforgivable. Don't ever dare to get close to me again coz if you do that.."

She lean to me and whisper.

"...I'm gonna kill you."

Para akong sasabog dahil sa narinig ko.

Tulala akong napatingin lang sa kanya at sinundan ang paglabas nya ng gym.

Napaawang ang mga labi ko at napakurap kurap ako.

Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig.

Hindi lang nya nagustuhan ang ginawa ko bagkus nilait nya pa ang boses ko.

Ang sama nya talaga!

Hindi nya ba naiintindihan na sa lahat ng babaeng nagkakandarapa sakin ay sya lang ang nag-iisang babaeng kinantahan ko ng ganito? Kahit kay Heart ay hindi ko pa 'to nagagawa kaya napakaswerte nya..tapos...yun pa ang sasabihin nya?

T*anginang yan!

Pakiramdam ko ay natapakan nya ang pride ko big time! Hindi lang tinapakan, dinurog nya pa.

Napakuyom ako ng palad habang matalim na nakatingin sa pintong nilabasan ni Jack.

Nagpakumbaba ako sayo Jack. Pero ito lang ang iginanti mo.

Pwes, magdusa ka!

I will never obey you again.

Lalapit parin ako sayo pero hindi para makipagbati kundi para hamunin ka sa isang laban na tiyak kong ikaw lang ang mahihirapan..!

I gritted my teeth and clenched my jaw.

"Boss, okay ka lang ba?" Rinig kong tanong ni Renz.

"Ligpitin nyo na lahat ng kalat. The show's over." Malamig kong sabi saka lumabas narin ng gym.

Narinig ko pa ang pagtawag nina Drew at Cody ngunit hindi ko na sila pinansin pa.

Humanda ka Jack, coz from now on, I will make your life a living hell..!

--