Kept

Chapter 39. Kept

GUSTONG sabihin ni Jave na wala na siyang pakialam sa mga nangyari noon at yakapin na lang nang mahigpit si Nicolea. He wanted to tell her to forget about everything but he knew that she could never do that. Hahayaan na lang niyang hilumin ng panahon ang mga sugat sa kanilang puso. Though he was certain that he was already healed, he knew she was not yet.

That's why from now on, Jave would be with Nicolea, he'd woo her and save her shattered heart the way she saved his.

His heart sank when he noticed she was about to cry.

He knew Nicolea. She would never use tears as her weapons. Kaya kung umiiyak ito, totoong nasasaktan ito. At iyon ang gusto niyang alisin dito—ang patuloy nitong sisihin ang sarili sa mga nangyari sa kanya... sa kanila.

He only wanted to comfort her and tell her to stop blaming herself because it's hurting him, too. He already got the reason why everything happened, but he didn't know all. His cousin was about to tell him everything but he interrupted him. Nicolea did not want him to know. Kaya nga ba kahit ano'ng hanap niya rito noon, ay hindi niya mahanap, dahil sinadyang itago ang identity nito.

He had been trying to talk to her about those things but he noticed she didn't want yet. Kaya nga niyaya na niya itong bumalik sa loob ng villa. But then she slowly spoke... so he'd listen to everything she was about to say now. Pakikinggan lang niya, pero hindi na niyon mababago ang desisyon niyang ligawan ulit si Nicolea. Kung siya ang papipiliin ay mas pabor sa kaniya kung sa simbahan na sila didiretso. Pero kung gusto naman nito na huwag muna, ay tatanggapin niya. Ang hindi niya tatanggapin ay kung sakaling tatanggihan siya ito.

She should not say no. He felt that she still loved her the way he did. Kahit hindi nito sabihin ang mga kataga ay ayos lang sa kanya. Ramdam na ramdam naman niya ang damdamin nito. Pero siyempre, iba pa rin kapag narinig niya. Napalunok siya at nag-focus.

He kept still and quiet while critically staring at his beloved.

"Are you listening to me? I said I lied to you, even back in College," ulit nito. "Tayo pa noon, Jave." Parang pinagpipilitan nitong nagkasala na ito noon pa man.

He wanted to smile and only adore her beautiful face. She may grew a lot but he was still seeing his young and sweet Nicolea. But then he noticed her nose was now reddish, he licked his lips as he listened to her. Napansin kasi niyang namumula iyon dahil sa pagpipigil nitong maiyak, kaya binigyang-pansin niya lalo ang mga sasabihin nito.

"Nag-aaral pa ako nang mag-training ako para mahasa sa pag-iimbestiga, pero hindi ko sinabi sa iyo."

"You had your reasons."

"Kahit na bawal! I should have told you because I trust you."

"But you didn't. And honestly, I don't give a damn about those things anymore." Shit, man! Listen to her first.

She pouted. "But I lied. Kahit na pagiging private investigator lang ang hinahasa ko noon, nagsinungaling pa rin ako." Nahalata niyang nagpipigil ito ng ngiti, kinilig yata sa sinabi niya.

Just like that, baby. Do not cry.

"Hindi ka galit? I am telling you that I lied."

A ghost of smile formed on his lips. Kahit sabihin yata nitong totoong may nangyari sa condo unit noon, ay wala na siyang pakialam. Mas ginago niya si Nicolea sa ginawa niya sa harapan nito mismo kahit hindi naman na kailangan iyon.

He sighed.

What's important was she was there beside him now. At gagawin niya ang lahat para hindi na sila malayo sa isa't isa.

"Jave! Hindi ka naman nakikinig!" Naiinis na bulalas ni Nicolea.

Ngumisi na siya. "It's alright. I didn't tell you some things back in college, too."

Suminghap ito at hindi iyon inaasahan. Napuno nang kalituhan at galit ang emosyong nasa magandang pares na mata nito. He always loved her hooded brown eyes. Lalo na sa tuwing namumungay ang mga iyon noon habang humahalinghing at paulit-ulit na tinatawag ang pangalan niya kapag malapit na itong labasan. Ngumisi siya nang maalala ang mga iyon. He loved how her grips tightened on his forearms as he kept on thrusting... And how she pulled his hair whenever he's filling his her in as he claimed her mouth.

"I did not tell you that I jerked off. Sometimes, when I talk to you over the phone."

Kumunot ang noo nito. He stared at her even more. As if he's memorizing every details of her face. Kahit hindi na kailangan iyon dahil kabisado naman niya. He smiled thinking that he could stare at her all day and all night.

"I also didn't tell you that I used to have your laminated photo, and I always made myself feel good under the shower as I stared at that alluring photograph of yours, uttering your name..." his baritone was husky.

Tuluyang nalaglag ang panga nito dahil hindi makapaniwalang sinasabi niya ang mga iyon.

"So don't blame yourself for keeping those secrets from me anymore, okay?"

Napalunok ito. "Ang m-manyak mo naman!"

Doon na siya humagalpak ng tawa. "How do you think did I survive those years without having sex?"

"Malay ko ba!" sigaw nito.

Mas lumakas ang tawa niya nang makita ang pagkataranta rito. Pulang-pula na rin ang mukha ni Nicolea, mukhang nai-imagine nitong ginagawa niya ang mga bagay na sinabi.

"W-Well, I also touched m-myself, thinking about how you gently m-made love to me before." Nicolea bit her lower lip as she uttered those words.

Damn, her voice was so sultry and it's turning him on.

"I also l-liked what you did back in the club."

He gasped hearing her confessed. Isa pa iyon sa inaalala niya nitong mga nakaraan, na paano kung nasaktan niya si Nicolea habang tila hayok siya nang gabing iyon?

"Ah, really?"

Gago! Ano'ng klaseng sagot iyan?

She nodded sheepishly. Then she gulped before saying, "I was hurt when you did that in front of me, too."

Nawala ang ngiti sa labi niya.

"But that's fine! I know that's your job..."

Bumuntong-hininga siya at umamin dito. "Sinadya kong ipakita iyon sa iyo para makaganti kahit paano."

She nipped her lower lip.

"That was the same night when reality hit me hard."

"Have you really investigated everything about me?" maliit ang tinig na tanong nito.

"I did. But I never got any information aside from you're still with that fake doctor."

"He's not fake anymore. Tinatapos na niya ang pagdo-doktor."

Parang nainis siya na pinagtanggol ni Nic ang lalaking iyon.

"And you're right, I needed to get rid of you... kahit labag sa loob ko."

Sandaling katahimikan ang namayani bago ito nagpatuloy sa paglahad ng mga pangyayari. Siya nama'y tahimik na nakinig sa lahat, at tama nga ang hinala niyang kahit ano pa'y wala nang makapagbabago sa desisyon niya. He would really come back to her life.

"Jave... Can we stop the hate towards each other?" pagsusumamo nito.

He should be the one begging for that.

"Sabi mo, mahal mo pa rin ako."

Napadako ang tingin niya sa kamay nito. Napangiti siya nang makitang suot pa rin nito ang singsing. "Oo, mahal na mahal."

"Nakakalokang magbiro ang tadhana, 'no? Tayo pa rin naman pala hanggang sa huli, bakit pa natin kinailangang mawalay nang paulit-ulit?" pagpapagaan nito sa usapan. She also chuckled to lighten up the situation. "Siguro, mga pagsubok ang lahat ng iyon para patatagin pa tayo lalo... At kunsabagay, ang lahat naman ng bagay ay pinaghihirapan," she added.

"And you are my brave Nicolea, baby."

This time, she smiled sweetly to him. "Ikaw rin naman."

"I needed to. Kung hindi ako naging matatag, baka nasa mental na ako't nagjajakol habang nakatitig sa picture mo nang walang pakialam kung sino ang mga nakakakita."

Minura siya nito ng malakas. "I can't imagine you, being an exhibitionist!" She was pertaining to that psychological disorder wherein those exhibitionists expose their genitals, usually to unsuspecting strangers, and become sexually excited when doing so.

Tumawa lang din siya.

Tumayo ito at bahagyang tumukod sa mesa para matapik ng malakas ang braso niya.

"That'll hurt, baby. Matigas ang muscles ko."

"Bwisit ka!" Natatawa nang bulalas nito.

"Pumasok na tayo sa loob."

Tumatawa na ito nang tumango at bumalik na sila sa loob ng villa.

They stayed and guarded Nicolea's friend until they went back in Manila. Sila nama'y nanatili sa isla.

"Hindi pa ba tayo aalis? Wala na tayong binabantayan, o."

Kumakain sila sa hapag kinabukasan matapos umalis nina JM at Yvonne.

"Nag-s-space out ka na naman, 'uy!"

He blinked twice. "Ayaw mo iyon? Solo na natin ang villa. You can scream all the way you want." He winked at her.

"Nakakahiya ka!" kunwaring singhal nito't agad na pinamulahan ng mukha.

He smirked remembering those sleepless nights he sneaked in her room and made love with her gently. Napailing siya nang mag-request ito na ulitin niya iyong paraan ng pag-angkin niya rito noon sa club.

But he wasn't complaining at all. It's turning him even more whenever she's begging for him to do her hardly. She was so sensual.

"Let's stay here for few more days. I like it here, we can spend a lot of time for the both of us."

"Sabagay," she agreed.

He sighed in relief. At least she was not doubtful that she's being kept in the island to be safe as well.

Nicolea would be hurt. But he'd make sure he would stay by her side. No matter what.