haven - jjk

Rita is of spanish origin and means pearl

___

Today was too good to be true. She should've known that it would go downhill. It's like there is something in the world getting in the way of her happiness. From the moment she woke up until two minutes ago she couldn't believe how smooth and peaceful her day has been. Until a phone call shattered the softness of the day.

A phone call she was sure she wouldn't get until at least the end of the year.

"I don't have anything to give you", Rita whispers into the phone. She clenches her teeth as she listens to the caller scream and demand more.

"I gave you all my salary a week ago, I don't have any money on me", Rita's voice shakes with anger.

Why was it always her? How come everyone around her gets to have loving parents that give them emotional and financial support? Why is it always her who has to sacrifice and give while everyone receives?

A sigh escapes her lips as she walks around the park, drowning in he thoughts.

"Rita?"

Rita snaps of her trance and turns around. A smile spreads on her tired face as she sees the only source of happiness walk towards her.

Jungkook, her boyfriend.

Whenever she is with him the cold and gloomy world she knew disappeared and is replaced by a warmer and safer one.

As soon as he approaches her he wraps his arms around her and suddenly all her worries were put aside for a while.

"How was your day?", he whispers as he sways them from side to side.

"It was bearable, how was yours", she answers. Jungjook's eyes twinkle as he starts telling her about his day.

These simple moments with Jungkook were her happiest times. Just sitting there listening to him to about his day. The way his eyes speak louder than his voice, his hands following the story. She never wants this to end.

The more she looks at him the more she wishes to be like him. Effortlessly happy, maybe not effortlessly but still happy. She knows he doesn't have the best life but still she wants to be someone who makes everyone smile as soon as they enter the room. Whose glow doesn't fade no matter how hard life is.

"Are you even listening?", Jungkook pokes her cheek with a smile. That smile on his face made her heart flutter. The one where his eyebrows rise and his eyes twinkle, where all of his teeth can be seen and the little mole under his mouth disappears. Yes, that one.

"I'm listening", she nods and urges him to continue.

Jungkook continues talking about his day. From the minute he woke up, to his manager blaming him for something he didn't do until he came here. Rita loved every second of it.

Until today she didn't understand why and how he fell in love with her. How he kept on appearing in front of her with that silly smile of his no matter how many times she ignored his advances, how many times she screamed and fought with him. He somehow always came back. She was always scared of her bad luck rubbing off on him. Her past affecting him.

Whenever she saw him approaching her she'd hear her mother's voice in her head.

You don't deserve to be loved, you ruined my life from the moment you entered it.

No that's not true. It wasn't her fault that her mother lived miserably. It wasn't her fault that her father left. Her mom didn't love her so she always believed she was unworthy of love. She was wrong. If she was unworthy of love how come Jungkook loves her so effortlessly? How come he always asks her about her well-being even if they weren't on good terms? How come it's so easy for Jungkook, who she met two years ago, to love her without expecting anything but her love and time? How come a stranger could but her mother couldn't?

It finally dawns on her. It wasn't her fault.

"Rita?", Jungkook gently shakes her.

"It's not my fault", she says chokes out.

"What isn't your fault?", his eyes filled with concern.

Rita turns to him, tears spilling down her face. "It isn't my fault!", her voice comes out hoarse but louder than before.

"Of course it isn't your fault. How can a pure hearted and kind angel cause trouble?", he cups her cheeks and leans closer to her. His nose softly rubbing against hers.

Rita leans into his warm hands. Finally being able to enjoy the feeling of being loved without her mother's voice haunting her.

Finally, she could enjoy the silence without her father's voice screaming at her for being worthless. She loved this silence.

"So what do you think of arson?", he suggests.

"Arson?" Rita wipes the tears off her face and looks up at Jungkook.

"You know to burn the person that blamed you", he says it as if it was the most obvious thing.

Rita burst into laughter. The laughter coming out of her like an endless waterfall. The joke shouldn't be so funny but it was hilarious to Rita. The longer she laughed the freer she felt.

Jungkook suddenly stood up and said, "Drop their address, don't be shy."

Which started another fit of giggles.

It wasn't her fault nor is it anyone's fault. The fact that she was still alive should be enough for her to be loved and cherished. If no one does it for her then she'll do that for herself.