That was the first time a man settled a dinner with me. I mean, sobrang espesyal iyon at napaka-effort ni John para maghanda ng ganoong dinner pero wala nang gumawa noon maliban sa kan'ya.
Yes, Louis, hadn't even think of it. I mean, yes, nag date kami pero doon lang sa restaurant at hindi pa n'ya ako nadadala sa kahit saan.
He's a very busy man. He has a lot of meetings, interviews, and shoots. I couldn't even seek his attention to me. He just called me when he had a free time. It was getting harder for me when I realized that my feelings for him was just infatuation. I couldn't accept the fact that I could feel this way. I thought all along that I loved him with all my heart because he cared for me, he even helped me to get over John. I thought he is now my only one beloved, my special, my future husband, the future father of my sons and daughters. I thought he will be the man who will stand in front of the altar waiting for me to walk in the aisle.
Oh, and by the way, John was right, Louis is already my ex, not my boyfriend anymore.
I broke up with him three days after my dinner date with John, exactly this day, when I found out that he was cheating on me. Matagal na s'yang may karelasyon sa katrabaho n'ya sa kanilang movie series, ang leading lady na si Kristina Henderson.
I was really devastated. I cried so hard. He cheated on me. Four months na silang may relasyon and he had been keeping it to me. He said he didn't want to hurt me because I was still in the process of healing the pain inside my heart. He should've told me earlier. I would understand, but the thought of him, having sex with that bitch inside his condo, that was a total slap on my face. I saw them, naked, pushing at each other's sex. Seeking their own ecstasy.
They disrespected me, they insulted me for who I am. Para akong isang bagay na hindi pinahalagahan, hindi man lang inisip kung anong mararamdaman ko. He said he loved me but he loved Kristina more the moment he laid an eye on her. Sabi n'ya, kaibigan lang dapat kami, dahil ang pagtingin lamang n'ya sa'kin ay isang kapatid, his little sister. He was just concerned of me. He was just showing his sympathy to me.
Yes, may mga pagkakamali akong nagawa. I cheated on him as well pero nagawa ko pa ring pigilan ang sarili ko. I shouldn't have trusted him, hindi ko dapat s'ya pinagkakatiwalaan, hindi dapat ako nagtiwala sa mga payo n'ya. He's totally a jerk, an asshole.
I just learned that all of them, men, don't deserve my love. They are all pricks. And now, I will be bitter. I will not fall for their tricks. Anymore.