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Review Detail of Joao_Pires in Rebirth of Milf Empress

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Joao_Pires
Joao_PiresLv49mthJoao_Pires

Good story, the first chapter really hooked me in and made me add the book immediately but, I think the author should change the way he introduces characters and their backstory. As there are still little chapters, and the author presents the characters by doings POVs about their whole life it looks like the MC is not present or unimportant to the story.

Rebirth of Milf Empress

Ekatra

Disukai oleh 1 orang

SUKA

Balasan3

Joao_Pires
Joao_PiresLv4Joao_Pires

I think you should present the characters backstory along the story and not all of it in a single chapter. For example, about the siblings, you could have the MC catching them in the act and by doing this introducing their relation and also involving the MC.

9mth
1
Joao_Pires
Joao_PiresLv4Joao_Pires

Also, when she talks with the system, there are a lot of times where she asks questions that already been said (I marked them in the chapters) (Ex.: "By doing missions you can get points that can be used to purchase things from the shop." and then she asks "What are the points for?", this is just an example I don't remember if it was this exact sentence) and also makes really dumb questions like "What is a novice gift pack?",wich is obvius just for the name, and to prove this, the response she got was "It is a gift pack that we give to novices."

9mth
2
Ekatra
EkatraPenulisEkatra

Thanx for the suggestions. I will consider these things in upcoming chapters.

9mth
2
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