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Review Detail of zaif123 in Not a Mob: Psycho

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zaif123
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Fifst off its well written like all of Ein’s stuff. Also the plot starts out great. MC has powers that are OP but not stupidly so. He doesnt have a goal beyond having a relaxed life but there are hints off that changing as he gets caught up in the plot. It seems like he is going to have character growth to determine a worthy goal. Also his relationship with yoruichi is developed well and they seem to have a good chemistry that was slowly and well built. Then suddenly he almost randomly chooses to get with rukia. Out of almost nowhere he sleeps with her and decides that she is a less risky option than getting entangled with yoruichi. It seemed odd but honestly if thats the direction ein wants to go thats fine its his story. As long as there is no harem which devolves into either weird introspection or stilted middle school philosophy about self worth which some of eins stuff drowns in. The story is good and mc is really cool and likeable. But after the rukia rescue arc mc ends up getting coerced by rukia to sleep with at least fifteen girls. Commence the bombardment of lemons and lemons and more lemons. MC now seems to just reluctantly bang every female character who falls for him just because he is so handsome and strong. Then bankai can be achieved by mc banging the zanpakto spirit of his women. Though he has at this point five women he claims its not a harem since he bangs them reluctantly for rukia. Then it devolves into the same harem nonsense where every chap is about him and his girls only interrupted by brief plot progression or action. Honestly it started off so well if ein can get back to the actual story and not focus so much on lemons it would be a home run story. Im not saying no lemons but lemons to this frequency leave me just skimming them until it gets back to the plot. Its at the point wheee the story itself is hard to find among the lemons. I was really excited to see ein back on his A game in the first 40-50 chaps. SO yeah everything five stars and story at 1 for now since it really went off the rails. But in my opinion it has the foundation with a likeable mc and good powers couples with some reasonable limits that if in the future the lemons decrease it would be 3-4 on the story.

Not a Mob: Psycho

Einlion

Disukai oleh 11 orang

SUKA

Balasan2

Einlion
EinlionPenulisEinlion

The great wall O_O...

RENSHU
RENSHULv4RENSHU

Author a question. Apologies if you find this question annoying, but will you be trying to write an adventure-action-centric fanfic? One which romance will be less of a focus? Don't get me wrong I do like reading a good harem fic but one that I think is not hindered(?) by too much skirt chasing and lemons. I have deep respect for your writing and a fan of yours since the something 100th chapter of EPIC. I just want to know if you would one day try something that is less romance-focused.

Einlion:The great wall O_O...