webnovel
Ergelina
ErgelinaLv13yr
2021-10-02 04:28

I like the plot, and what you've come up with. Just one thing, you could make it more fluid? No need to write it out it's happening in front of the building, make us read it... give her the action. Keep it up!

Where it all went wrong?

DaoistFlevoi
4.9
13 Chs

Liked by 2 people

LIKE
Replies1
DaoistFlevoi
DaoistFlevoiAuthor

Thank you for your review. I'll try to do better from the next chapter onwards.

3yr
1
Other Reviews
Evertruth727_
Evertruth727_Lv10

From the first chapter: Simply amazing I must say. I had never really invested myself into the horror genre books. But this one surely did piqued my interest. The sense of mystery at the end of the first chapter. 10/10

3yr

Rin_Arizu
Rin_ArizuLv1

The plot is nice and good, the mysteries are intriguing too. There's a point where I was confused but nonetheless it's a very good novel with solid plot.

3yr
Scarlet_Wolf96
Scarlet_Wolf96Lv2

interesting and caugh my attention. I understand this storyline. the atmosphere is also starting to feel. I can only give 1 suggestion. usually "calm before thunderstorm". Just reading a few chapters made me happy. don't forget to add spices that can make your readers' hearts beat fast and are typical of horror. but this alone is good. I like it... 😊👍❤

3yr
leorichard2021
leorichard2021Lv1

Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact leorichard2021*@*outlook.com (please ignore both * when sending email). A brief introduction, some sample chapters or links will be appreciated when reaching out.

3yr
Darine_ALRAMMAH
Darine_ALRAMMAHLv1

I really love this novel because of the story line and characters. The writing quality is also great and the plot is, like, AMAZING. Definitely recommend it. I could also see how much you love horror just by your choice of words and scenes. You're a gifted author, I hope you realize that and keep on posting. PS: Added to library!

3yr
D_C_5510
D_C_5510Lv1

The characters here seems well written and have good potential. Up to chapter 4 the suspense is kept well. I'm looking forward to read future chapters and learn what made this characters act how they are acting.

3yr
Reo_
Reo_Lv1

I can see that you your self like horror by the way you write. The story is something amazing so far, what really stood out to me where the characters and their decisions. So far so good! The story has potential keep it up!

3yr
Lancee
LanceeLv1

A good read. The story itself has potential to be something trully amazing, the plot seems promising through out the 2 chapters and the character's are life like which is good at the reader's interpretation. Overall i liked the story.

3yr
Ash_Stay
Ash_StayLv1

Loved the story. The plot is amazing and the first chapter hooked me. The emotions of the characters are delivered well. Good job author. I will keep on reading the story.

3yr
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