Review Detail of mirxkewl in Phosphene

I like the overall concept of the story! If there's any feedback that I have, I'd say that the stuttering can get a bit over for the woman that's introduced in Chapter 3. The world building is interesting and I like the character that's introduced to us in Chapter 1, although the transition to the mysterious woman can get confusion. Chapter 1's definitely my favourite because of the contrast, though, the way the situation is portrayed to be normal when it really isn't to the audience's eye. I think using quotations to differentiate between the narrator's voice and character's voice could also help. Overall, great novel and it has a lot of potential. Woo, keep going, author! :D