My first criticism is the grammar. It's definitely among the most poorly edited stories on webnovel. As a general criticism, I would like to state that the story as a whole is very bland. Our MC is just this emotionless blob. The plot is rather similar. I dropped this nine or so chapters in, and the MC has yet to face even a minor setback. As a whole, it's not a bad story, but it definitely needs work.

my fanfic so five stars for me ..................................................................................😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎

I spoiled the novel in many ways 1 you didn't focus on the MC character making him totally superficial 2 The whole story is a narration and that makes her with no feelings 3 characters seem empty 4 You each chapter time skip he makes all the Training it talks about unrealistic

Bad grammar, 2-3 chapters were just a repeat of each other by giving POV of other people which were basically entirely same to each other. Doesn't really feel like the story is alive.

haha idiot. since when did uzumaki become the best clan than senju? than hyuuga? and kaguya clan which is the embodiment of otsusuki kaguya?🤣🤣 aside from good chakra source? and those useless sealing techniques which even a sidekick like orochimaru has broken their most strongest sealing technique the reaper death seal?? hyuuga clan had byakugan that if they are lucky, could evolve into tenseigan. kaguya clan have shikotsumyaku from kaguya otsutsuki while senju aside from being a clan with the highest chakra had a person that could use mokuton with the slight power of divine tree. so tell me? what highlights does uzumaki had to be on par with uchiha? troll.

so far, all I've read was gibberish. nothing worth noting. It somehow feels like I've read MTL. If I wanted to I could've just went to ComradeMao and found a decent MTL there. Overall the editing and writing needs more work. If I have any advice, use grammarly man, it works wonders.

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I wonder if anyone has even noticed how annoying the grammar is. From time to time the sentences doesn't make any sense because of the grammar. It's simply horrendous and annoying.

this fanfics is really good and i was just wondering if you were gonna give him the Rinnegan bcs its said that when someone has the blood of both indra and ashura they get the rinnegan and uzumakies are descendants of ashura and uchiha are a decendent of indra so the mc should get rinnegan