Review Detail of Daoist_Urimiku in Deleted1

Writing Quality: 2/5. Overall, good basics. Lots of grammatical errors that can be easily fixed. Lots of misuse of past and present tense in the same sentence/paragraph, but can be easily fixed. Many spelling errors present, but can be easily fixed. Hence why I didn't give this a 1/5, because they are easy-to-fix mistakes. Stability of Updates: 5/5 only because it's new. Story Development: 4/5 It's a good idea, the execution of the story could have been better.... Character Design: 1/5 After one chapter, we still don't know if the protagonist is male or female. I mean, sure, the synopsis does refer to the MC as a "he" but since the story is in first-person narrative, it would be nice if "he" is introduced as such. The character isn't a smart character, and there is absolutely no development in the first chapter. Design-wise... there is no proper detail or description of the character. All we know is that the character is an idiot with money. The type of character who doesn't know how to spend money. He takes out a 2million loan with a 50% interest per annum, which would mean he owes the loan sharks 83k per month worth of interest on top of the 2million loan he owes, so he actually owes 3million in 1 year... but he spends half of his loan on real estate, and the rest of his loan on living expenses, and then invests everything into the online game. Everything meaning nothing since he already spent 1mil on shelter, and set aside the rest for other expenses. Most characters would save some money for the game. Not our MC here. He's at zero money again, and after 1 month he owes 83k to loan sharks. World background: 5/5 Reason: It's a harsh world the MC lives in, kind of resembles what our real world would look like in about 50-100 years from now. So it's obviously a futuristic version of our world, especially since VR gaming is still new right now but is a major platform for this novel's world. There isn't much detail about the world, but we know there is inflation, and 5 part time jobs isn't enough to pay rent and bills, 2million loan with 50% interest is easily given out to people with no credit, a guy with no money is still somehow able to buy a burger at a shopping district, and has the luck to win the main prize at a lottery. Generic and cliched? Yes. But this is the reality of Systems-Novels.