Wudi_Tianxia

Te digo desde ya que eso no va a pasar.

Solo te puedo responder con un meme viejo: "eres un buen soñador, Max"

The main problem with your story is the same with the other fics of ATG. MC that dosen't struggle in the world and are flat in personality, unlike Yun Che, and if the authors want to make the story interesting, need to add harem. Which I don't mind, if it is well written, which in most cases, it's not. Like I said, the way you developed the relationship with Chu Yuechan is really good, and I was hoping that you would do the same with Qingyue and the rest. Unfortunately, it dosen't happen like that. Forget about the women not acting like they should do, the problem is the MC, he dosen't struggle, he wants a harem(which is a bit cringe) and be on the top of the world (Which I don't remember him saying that), but after that? He dosen't want anything else, his personality is flat and he is not interesting to me. And if you add the women falling for him with ease, well... I don't need to explain furthermore.

I have to make a proper review after seeing the shit reviews of the people, reviewing this stroy as a 5 strarts or 4. I am going to mention the main problems. First problem: the most important, and it is that this story has a huge plot hole, a HUGE ONE. Let's say that the author stated one thing in the story, and after some hundred chapters occours events that could not be possible because of the thing that the author stated before. It affects enourmously the story a lot and in my case I couldn't stop thinking about it while I read. Second problem: The MC it too powerful, this maked the author to cause the huge plot hole. From chapter 500 the MC was too powerful and this caused the story to develop in a way that caused the plot hole, specifically, it forms after chapter 900 if I remember. Third: The romance is shit, before chapter 800 the romance was really good, the best I've read, but after that, woman start falling in love with the MC because Why not?. It dosen't explain why, well, it does but the reasons are pretty bad and there is not development of the romance. Fourth problem: After chapter 900, in where the huge plot hole presents, the story is just bad, It's like the author didn't know where to head the story. Fifth: The author is not writing the story anymore.

Like always, you cooked. I hope you recover yo give your max!

He is not the author of the story, is the translator.

It has one of the greatest starts in a ATG fanfic that I ever read. But after chapter 33 it becomes the same shit of always in this kind of fics. Women that falls in love for no reason or for a demostration of power from part of the MC and the same thropes of this kind of fics. In the first 30 chaptes I thought that was going to be a really good romance with deveopment, because of the way it develops the relationship of Chu Yuechan but after that, the women characters like Qinyue and Cang Yue act out of character, falling in love with the MC for whatever reason that it dosen't explain. I have to say It has some original things and the comedy is really good, but besides that, it is not good for me.

I don't write bad reviews about things that I don't like, much less I insult the work of others. But, let me give you a review about what I think about the beggining of the story, it could help you. Look, when I read chapter 1 and saw that all the paragraphs were in indent, my expectations lowered a lot, but I keep reading until chapter 2 and I couldn't continue. The first chapter was bad, in the way that you don't give any information about the MC, only that he was a smart businessman with fortune, you present two characters and then the MC goes to the awakening ceremony. When you write a first chapter, you have to hook the reader to keep continue reading the story, usually in these types of story is about the MC, you should give me reasons to follow his path, but you don't, I don't even know about the personality of the MC or have a slight idea of it. In your place, I would have started the chapter like this, the three first paragraphs are good I would use them, then I would wirte about the thoughts of the MC, about his past life, how he died, about the world, if he knows it (I don't know if he knows it), and his ambitions. After that, I present the two maids, I would write a little about them, the past, how they met with the MC or you can give a general idea. Finally, at the end, they have a conversation with him and go to the awakening ceremony. Like I said, is an advice about the first chapter, I didn't even finished to read chapter 2 and I don't plan to, this story is not for me, that's all. Good luck with the fic!

Happy birthday Ana!! Your brother is cooking!!

Me, after remembering that gojo is dead: