Zackary_Zhangcheng

This review is of the first three chapters. The quality of the work is excellent. Though there are a few tense inconsistencies here and there, I can say for certain that the author is a seasoned one. The storyline itself is also intriguing. I won't spoil too much here. For now, I look forward to more updates to come :)

I am a fan of Oda's humility.

Does he know for sure that he died? It seems like his old body just went unconscious.

Hmm. The tense is inconsistent here. Try using "burst" instead of "bursts".

I like this bit of world building. It's both subtle and effective.

Alright, not to go on a string of critiques, but I'd also recommend lengthening the time in which the speaker processes his surroundings. This conclusion, though obvious to readers, shouldn't be as much so to the character placed in the situation.

This dialogue seems a little unnatural. Perhaps try reading it out loud to see if it sounds the way you intend.

The story, at least from what I've read this far, is one the most well written I've seen on this platform. The grammar, descriptions, and character development are all there. My only issue is how admittedly slow the pace is. But a good story requires patience, am I right? I look forward to seeing what else our heroes of cultivation have to offer.

I really hope to see these powers shown to us readers. I'll admit, while the writing style is near perfect, the pace is a little slow. But at least you're establishing the relationships between characters.

It's kind of interesting to see such a dynamic character who's only five years old. I do hope he doesn't pull off any unrealistically ***** feats out of nowhere though. We need character development 😤