AntCafe

that's a cool little addition, thanks for the explanation!

mate don't stress, you've written this better than I ever could lol, I'm very much looking forward to seeing how the story progresses so keep up the good work, apologies if my comments have been sounding judgemental as well i don't mean for it to come off like that

lampooning mentioned, Klein would be proud

how did he see the spirit yet alone communicate with it? he's not a beyonder and doesn't have spirit vision, unless that prayer to evernight worked?

potentially describe how they are exploring the ship, are they cautiously peering around corners hence how they see the guards, are they watching around corners on a reflective object?, also describing what the guards are doing helps, like with what you did with the last guard how he was fighting off drowsiness, are these two chattering amongst eachother keeping a low vigil, or are they watching like a hawk.

writing scenes like this with a bit more uncertainty might help, such as instead of saying their was a gun and a knife on his waist, you could say that by the light of the torch (or whatever else is being used as light, considering from my knowledge they are in the bottom of the ship, a pretty dark place) caster could make out vague outlines of what seemed to be a gun and knife, you could then use this to trick the reader by revealing it wasn't a gun but something else or somesuch if you wished, and in my opinion fleshes out the environment a bit more, like is the room dim so he can only make out shadows, or is it bright so he can see mostly everything. (apologies for the paragraph, I suck at cutting stuff like this down)

unless this was meant as sarcasm on his part, I wouldn't say inspired to be reasonable response, more coercion, a damned if I do damned if I don't situation but the prior might just save them. granted I might have read the prior speech wrong

I didn't even realise this story was the authors first novel on this site so I'd like to apologise if I was a bit harsh

Author you ok?

Author are you still intending to get back to this story in the future?