M_Mariegold

Lv1

A young low-key Author, writer and Poet. I write for my readers to read. "My passion and hobby became my occupation"

2020-07-02 BergabungGlobal

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M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
hi long time no read... I want to say that. you forgot to put '?' at the end of the word. since he's asking question. therefore you should put question mark.
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King’s Karma
Fantasi · Palosians
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Diterbitkan
I really like the works and Grammar that you used. I really like the writing style except for abuse that are used. When I first read I felt like I'll get bored soon. But you book is like a glue. I learned many thing from this book and I really really enjoyed it.
The Order Of Chaos
Fantasi · Lord_Damocles
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
There is a mistake in this parah 'uou'
"Yes,I'm alright but why're you holding that?"I ask him then he answered which did frightened me a bit."For killing you in case you're an imposter...because you laughing weirdly while meditating.So I thought the dark energy had consume you.....". That was his answer,seriously I should be careful around him next time."It's me alright calm yourself and put the knife down or else uou may accidentally killed me",I told him to put the knife down and he did it.He also give me a warning that I should not laugh when I am meditating because it look scary.The expression looks cute because he's a small bird after all.
THE ORDER OF THE ELEMENTS
Fantasi · Zane_Earth
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
make sure to put space after every new sentences, after full stop.
On the next morning,I woke up and clean myself while the bird/useless noisy master still sleeping in a posture of a dead bird.I cleaned up the old hut while practicing to absorb the nature's elements (the green particles). Through absorbing the particle(not dust) my breathing capacity increase and my body became light.I managed to clean the hut within 1 hour and I don't even feel tired at all.Then I sit and start my meditation for another hour.As I meditate,I could see the green particle.I was surprised as my eyes was closed but I wondered why the green particles looks small which was around three millimeters.
THE ORDER OF THE ELEMENTS
Fantasi · Zane_Earth
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Balas shifuufufuuud
I meant the dialogue. haha
If someone hears this whisper, they may say he is definitely crazy. But the fact is, this little guy is really telling the truth. How come I know ( Because I'm the author.) because I'm the little guy you're reading about.
Legend of the Spirit Continent
Fantasi · Commoner_Prince
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
My mouth is filled with water, after reading this paragraph. @_@
I read the book and it explains lots of thing about the training I had to do.'You know as a human you need this five senses to survive and what will happen if you don't have one of this senses?You will lost your way.For example for sense of taste.You may think you could taste anything with your taste bud but have you try tasting your food without smelling or looking at the food.If looked at your food such as fried chicken,you would remembered the taste same as well for smelling.You will remembered the smell and not to forget when you eating your food you could hear the crunching sound you make as you devour the fried chicken.And finally as you touch your food, you're actually touching its texture which will triggered your brain to remember the texture.'
THE ORDER OF THE ELEMENTS
Fantasi · Zane_Earth
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
I think you missed a word 'started looking at me...'
Adrian started at me with wide eyes "who are you, who do you work for?" Adrian shouted and without warning charged with his sword towards me a smile came across my face, my reflexes were better, I was stronger and faster than him.
When You Arrived
Fantasi · Rida908
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
superman....
I laser eyed them to dust, and I started flying like superman sending a shockwave killing all of them at once. Not a signal one of them was left. I landed on the ground with a bang I had no cuts and bruises. I looked around at what just happened "what the hell did I do.... what is wrong with me?" I said in a shaking voice.
When You Arrived
Fantasi · Rida908
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
I think there is a mistake 'Good, now'
I nod my head "good know wear this" he hands me a pair of trousers and a shirt.
When You Arrived
Fantasi · Rida908
M_Mariegold4 years ago
Berkomentar
Hi there... there is a mistake in first line, Use 'Placed' instead of 'places'.
I woke up to the sound of horses hooves, a knife was places under my chin, I was welcomed by an old man with trembling hands and he says "III don't know ooo you are but I don't wan any trouble missy" "my names Rachel I'm Ahhhhhhhh" l looked at my hand and saw my hand is covered in blood a deep wound is on the side of my hip my eyelids starts to close, I can hear people around me in slow motion I lose conscious...
When You Arrived
Fantasi · Rida908