Sarah Jane's Diary of No Sound

When silence is loud it rings in your ears. It yells even dares you to make noise. It warns you to keep quiet no sudden sounds. It will whisper in your ear causing some to grow awkward and others to become impatient. Silence is fragile do you truly wish to break it. It is soothing before it is shattered. Silence is as loud as it is quiet. It can save a soul and damn one too.

That is how I grew up in the cold stone house I will never call home aloud. Pondering whether or not I should break the silence. In the end it wasn't me who broke the silence. The screams of my mother shattered it and continues to do so even though her noise has long since lost its voice.

My father keeps his silence well. Only I know what he's done. And if I ever get a chance to break my silence I don't know if I would. It will be deafening whatever my decision. The problem is in the end will it be me or him that goes deaf from the ringing in our ears.

The blood stains in our carpet are now an echo of the past. My father has brought a few women home in hopes of moving on I suppose. It never ends well they always break theirs.

He has punched me a few times but I know the drill. Keep it I live. Drop it and well you know what happens it shatters. Everything shatters.

He's made a move forcefully a few times and I quietly let him take what he wants. It appears that the silence is ringing. Is it in my head or his?

I'm drowning in it I think I will be the first one to go deaf. Before or after he decides to silence me I do not know.

It's pounding it pounding. It won't stop pounding. I wish it will stop.

It's keeping me up. It used to help me fall asleep.

Their screams still echo. It's funny how you still hear things when there is nothing making the noise.

If I could scream will it become an echo? I'm sure no one would hear it. I'm screaming now. On the inside.

I saved a woman the other day. She silently left before he came back into the room. The winterstorm hide her tracks as if she was never there. He was quietly fuming. He took it out on me.

I'm sore. When did silence start hurting?

My father's home today. It's quiet. He's just sitting on the couch staring at the stain. I wonder if he hears the whispers as I do.