KonoSuba: Crimson Eyed Devils

"The fuck are you doing?"

I asked, not really in the mood for any shenanigans.

"Fuck you, that's what."

I sucked in a breath, flipping the page of the book I was reading, which lacked any sort of imagination, or drama, the action was subpar and the romance was so down in the dumps that the author used "Undescribable feeling that attracted me to him" every time a new female was introduced.

Sighing in annoyance, I glanced at the dumbass that was sitting on the floor next to my bed, his black mop of hair visible over the edge. The sound on what I recognized as notes was periodically ringing out in the room and distracting me from the boring, yet required task that I was completing.

Closing the book, I whacked the bastard over the head. He didn't react but the notes stopped for a moment.

"Do that somewhere else, I'm reading this offense to romance everywhere called a story."

He signed and dropped his head on the bed, his red eyes, much like my own, staring at me with nothing but exhaustion.

"Why are we even here? What's stopping us from leaving?"

I looked at him for a moment in silence and went back to reading.

"We are seven, six more years, we can fuck off then."

I shrugged and ignored the groan that was my brother's response.

To think that seven years ago, we were nineteen and twenty respectively and then we died, apparently messing up our "Death timer" and that dumbass goddess sent us here by accident.

"Hey, remind me again, what's your magic power stat?"

I blinked, frowned, and dug into my pocket to pull out a card.

"It's sixty-eight right now."

I informed him, throwing the card on the bed and forgetting about it for the time being.

"How much more do you need for the gravity magic?"

I pressed the icon of a man with a mage hat on top of his head and the available skills opened up to me.

The admittedly lame name of "Force Pressure" showed an 11-point requirement and I looked at the available points I could spend.

"I don't need anymore, I got thirty-four right now and the simplest one needs eleven. I'll try to learn it naturally and I can branch out from there."

Getting a grunt in response, I dropped the card and went back to reading to raise my magical power, which was basically intelligence with a different name.

Right now, I have nine spells, three of them learned from the card, while the others I developed on my own.

Gravity magic, which was named "Force" in this world, was my next target. When I asked, it was named like that because it looked like an invisible force was weighing down a target.

What was this? Star Wars crossover?

There was silence for the next few minutes, with the occasional flipping of paper when the door to our room burst open, and a man with dark hair and a mustache, wearing a coat with fingerless gloves and a neck choker barged inside, taking a pose.

"My name is Hiropon! I am-"

I threw my book at him, which he grabbed mid-air.

"We know who you are, Dad, stop doing that inside the house."

The middle-aged man slumped in disappointment but perked up again a second later.

"Come, my Sons, cause's of my immense pride and joy! It's time to celebrate the birthday of Yunyun!"

I blinked and let the words sink in for a moment. Getting off the bed, I tapped my brother on the head absently and walked over to the desk that was in the room. Picking up two boxes, I threw one at my lookalike and walked over to him.

He caught it and extended his other hand to me, which I grabbed and pulled him up.

"Big Bro!"

A squeaky voice shouted as we walked down the stairs, followed by a series of pit-pats as a small figure ran to me. I crouched down and raised my arms, letting the little girl tackle-hug me.

"Happy birthday, Yunyun."

I patted the little girl on the head.

"What am I? Chopped liver?"

I dutifully ignored my brother, but nonetheless let the little one go so she could hug him too.

"Other big bro!"

Letting out an indignant squawk, the asshole patted our little sister's head.

"Here, brat, for you."

He held out the box and Yunyun took it eagerly, opening it on the spot, only to reveal a book. She turned curious eyes to my twin, so he had to explain.

"It's an elemental defensive magic theory, I added some hints to the spells that I developed too."

Our little sister's eyes lit up in excitement and the bastard was hugged again. Offering up the box, in exchange for a set of hugs for myself, I waited patiently for her to be done with showing her appreciation.

When she finally turned to me, I offered her my version of the elemental offensive magic theory that I managed to write up. To be honest, the defensive one was made by me too, but this year it was my turn to prepare the gifts for both of us.

"Thank you, big bro!"

Ah, hugs.

I sent a smug look to my brother who just rolled his eyes. I was the favorite here, suck on that, bitch!

////

My P-atre-on p-atreon-.com/user?u-=79594910.

If it does not work my name there is ItsaMeMario, the first three chapters will be free.

Originally, I just proposed the idea to my bro and then started to write it, like three weeks ago and we liked how it turned out.

Right now I have eight chapters ready so there will most likely not be a delay for a while.