Fire & Silk

The warm sun rays bounce on my skin and I watch it glow from the corner of my eye. I let out a sigh as awful thoughts swirl in my mind. I'm confident that I'll be able to get out of here one day. I will be free like a soaring bird in the sky free from this loneliness and dread that has consumed me. I draw my gaze to the rags and cracks in my quiet and lonely home, the tattered wallpaper and outdated furniture give my humble home a retro feel, and the sound of droplets splashing in an already formed puddle adds to the effect of how miserable I am.

I stay rooted in my spot as my mind wanders to my past.

I watched my mom die right in front of my eyes when I was 10 and since then I have travelled this journey alone. She sacrificed herself to save the Luna during war but her efforts were washed away when the Luna was killed shortly after however, that is something only I know because I watched the entire scene a few feet away, screaming at the top of my lungs.

As punishment, Alpha Ragnar, ruler of the Fire Bird pack and where I belong, banished me from the pack. I have to live far away from my pack but in the territory. He believed my mother killed the Luna when my mother's dead wolf was on top of her. But that was not the case, even in my mother's death she was protecting her.

Most people are unaware of my existence while others chose to ignore my presence. Why would anyone want to be in the presence of someone who's mother failed to save their Luna. Luna Emeralda was a sweet lady and a mother to the pack. Everyone loved and respected her. However, my mother, who was a warrior in the pack was far more important to me. She was all I had when my dad left us. I wonder how she continued to smile even when her mate left her. I never got to meet him but from her stories I visualized him over and over again in my mind adding new features to how she described him but over time, even his face slowly faded away.

Throughout my nine years of living out here anger has been deep rooted in my being. The betrayal of my pack, being taken away from people I've known as friends and most importantly the sense and ability to talk to anyone and carry out a normal life was robbed from me. I have lived in agony and pain. loneliness is all I know. I have no desire to live but one little scorching thought swirls in my mind: I'm going to leave here. I have to.

I live in the forest with a little hut for shelter. Mother nature provides me my daily meals. I clean up my house as much as I can and stroll down to the small lake next to my house that provides fresh water which my body really requires right now. No one comes around here, so I can undress without fear of being seen. I suppose there are some perks to living here.

I neatly fold my clothing beside me and walk towards the cool water. I go by the name Aiyana. I am 5'5 and have what people call an hourglass physique all thanks to being malnourished. I know some girls are yearning for the perfect body shape, but here I am with what they want but no decent meal, Oh, the irony. My olive skin complements my black long wavy hair cascading down to my hips. I turn my gaze to the sunset and I'm pretty sure if you looked into my eyes you'd see a rich brown spectrum. I completely submerge myself in the water, allowing the cool water to flow through every part of me. I spend some time swimming and cleaning myself and then I peak my head out of the water watching the sky take a deep shade of purple and tiny lights scattered on the sky.

I wonder what would my life have been like if I had been born into royalty.

After a decent amount of time in the water, I walk towards the land and walk towards my home making sure to bring my clothing with me. Today is a special day. It is Alpha Ragnar's son Jaxon's engagement declaration and the entire pack is expected to attend the ceremony. The name of Jaxon brings a smile to my face and so does a pang of hurt. I place my palm on my chest and rub on it. I've known him since I was a child and we used to be best friends, however, time and distance has drifted us apart. I am curious to see how much he had grown. If he had been eating well, keeping himself happy, and remaining the sweet youngster I once knew.

It's almost seven p.m. and the event starts in an hour. I make sure to wipe myself thoroughly. including my hair. Then I rummage through my closet looking for an acceptable outfit until my fingertips dangled upon on a white silk gown. A smile spreads across my lips as I take it out and hold it Infront of me. A vivid image of Lucy's face displaying in my mind, the nanny who looked after me. She was a kind woman who looked after me until I had to come here. She gave me a bunch of her stuff including this dress in case I needed it. Today, I suppose, would be a good occasion to wear it.

After putting on the silk dress I let my hair down, put some gloss and mascara on. If only there was someone here to look at me and tell me I look beautiful, I let out a long sigh. No one would want me, a tear streams down my cheek as I smile and take one last glance at myself.

Not after what happened that day and the look on everyone's eyes that drew a scar in my soul.