Don't raid Area 51

"We need to get moving!"

"All of the staff to the guard towers! Kill all intruders!"

"What the hell is going? Why is every guard in this god forsaken facility on such high alert?" Said the 21 year old looking man named Specs

"Farsight, what is going on? Why are the guards so understaffed? Normally there are 5-10 guards assigned to each cell, but now there are barely 1 for 5?" Said the 3 meter tall fat guy named blob. He weights approximately 1.7 tons and is 3.27 meters tall.

"There are over 5 million people running towards the facility with their hands behind their backs in... a flapping motion? It kinda looks like this." Farsighted got into the weird running form which is known as the naruto run.

"That is a highly ineffective running posture. Your hands will pick up extra air resistance, your body weight will be shifted so the heavy run will damage your body, the acceleration will be harder to handle plus not having the hands in a swinging motion will reduce the actual speed by about 38.97% while the maximum speed will be cut approximately 57.3-ouch!"

"Shut up you idiot! We all know how ineffective it is! We don't need numbers we need a plan!" Said the 1.83 meter tall, 19 year old, bulky and scary looking man known as J.A.C.K to the little, 1.2 meter tall, 13 year old looking Girl known as Luis, after he smacked the back of her head.

"The guards are all busy killing those idiots. This is the prime opportunity to escape and gather unknown artifacts. Even farsight doesn't know what type of shit is kept in this hellhole of a facility."

"Doesn't matter what you guys want, no one is touching my gauntlet, understood!" Said the 6th person in the cell. He has red skin, big nightshade purple eyes, four big and bulky arms and a chest that screamed pure muscle. This is the man known as Tetras

"Nobody wants your gauntlet, idiot! Only members of your race can use it. I can alter my body shape, but I can't alter my DNA." Said Specs

"Enough of this! How de we escape? Our bodies are being suppressed by these damn collars. We can't leave this cell without them completely vaporizing your necks and putting a hole through mine." Said Jack

"I can disable the collars in a few minutes, but I don't have any tools. Maybe one of you can find something that matches my tool so I can utilize it."

"I'm a shapeshifter. Farsight, check her brain and relay those tool into my mind. Can't turn into something I don't understand."

Farsight scanned the brain of Luis and transferred all the images of the tools she spoke of directly into Specs's mind. Specs received information about the images and function of the tools. Specs turned into the ones Luis told him to and they managed to take off Blob's collar in 2 minutes. The panicked guards didn't even notice this activity. The next one was Farsight, then Tetras, then Jack and now it was their turn.

Jack picked up Specs and repeated all the steps Luis took to remove the collar on her. This was quite the amazing feat, but the 5 prisoners treated it like it was as normal as it could get. Now the only one left was Specs.

"Jack, could you hand over Specs to me. I think I know how to remove his collar."

Jack listened to what Tetras said and handed Specs over to him. Tetras slammed Specs's tool form onto the floor with enough might to create a lot of small cracks on the reinforced concrete/titanium floor. Specs turned back into his human form and felt intense pain.

"What the hell you jackass! Couldn't you have done that without breaking my neck!"

"You don't have a neck. You're basically dough, but almost as intelligent as the idiots doing that weird run outside. And the jackass is this guy." Tetras pointed towards Jack.

"Name is jack and the reason I am here is because I got caught stealing something from this facility. You might think I'm a thief, but my main occupation is still a hitman and I have 100% success rate. Better hope I don't "accidentally" put you on my list, Tetras!" Said the former hitman. A light smirk could be seen on his face.

"No time for this stupid stuff you two. We need to get out. Jack, you are the only one who knows this place inside out. how do we leave?"

"Okey. Tetras, carry Luis on one of your arms or on your back. Blob, try to keep up and stay next to me. Farsight, you are to remain behind Blob and inform me of any approaching humans or other prisoners. Specs, I need you to turn into a 98.7 cm long, 17.3% steel, 12.4% iron, 30% tungsten, 7.7% copper, 20% crystallite and 12.6% pig iron claymore. The total weight should be about 49.7 kilograms. Farsight, keep scanning my brain and inform Specs of ANY changes I make to the claymore, in my head, so Specs can adapt them as fast as possible. This might make the biggest difference in combat."

Everyone nodded to Jack's plan and got ready to escape. Jack picked up the now transformed Specs and told Blod to charge the wall behind them. The bars were reinforced with vibranium, so blowing them up, cutting or bending wasn't even an option.

Blob stood up and started running at a speed inconceivable for someone of his weight. He started running faster than the fastest Olympic runner and smashed straight through the wall.

The guards heard the crash and came looking. Five guards saw the empty cell and sent a notice to command center of their escape.

"This is STF captain Dan to command center. Command center, do you hear me?"

"Command center can hear you. What's the emergency?"

"The six people, designated as 37, 768, 666, 27, 88 and 4857, from cell K, containment site 2, have escaped. Initiate lockdown immediately! Don't let any one of those escape and quickly kill off those idiotic naruto runners/Kyles/Karens/furries/whatever the hell those idiots are called and recontain the prisoners."

"Command center has heard you and will execute the orders immediately!"

"This is the 13th breach this day. Who would have though a stupid joke would lead to a facility wide panic and escapes. "Gonna see dem aliens!" they are being contained at a military base for a fucking reason! Why would those idiots think it was a good idea to do this?"

"Don't underestimate the stupidity of idiots!"

"You are-!"

"SASHIMI!" The guy wearing a deadpool costume swung his two katanas and sliced the 5 guards into tiny meat cubes. "Remember kids, don't be an idiot! Also #stormArea51 gonna free Dem prisoners!"