Gengar: Johan Just Can't Do It!
[A Ray of Sunshine]
It wasn't the flashiest name, but it subtly conveyed Johan's vision.
One day, his café could employ Pokémon as staff or even provide a temporary shelter for Pokémon in need—like Vulpix, who once hid in a trash heap, or Gengar, who had slumbered within a rock for a millennium before meeting Johan.
Johan wanted to offer them a little warmth—a "ray of sunshine."
He even imagined building a small Pokémon courtyard in the future, a sanctuary for strays, those in distress, or Pokémon unsuitable for capture. If they could help out at the café, all the better.
His standards weren't high.
If a Bewear from Alola or a singing Jigglypuff from Kanto wanted to work as bouncers, that would be perfect.
And if a Victini, Mew, Marshadow, or Shaymin—a combination of cuteness and power—wanted to join, he wouldn't say no.
Johan believed his café could become a haven beloved by Pokémon.
For now, however, it was only a dream. At the moment, he didn't even have a single permanent employee.
The café's menu was simple: espresso, latte, and cappuccino. Items like ice cream, macarons, or cream puffs were listed for decoration only.
But that didn't stop the grand opening from being lively.
Steven, Roxanne, Erika, Wally, and others—plus Johan's acquaintances from Rustboro City—all came to celebrate.
Gengar, Tinkatuff, and Dratini temporarily served as waitstaff, while Vulpix assisted Johan in making coffee.
The laughter could be heard from streets away.
At Team Rocket's Base in Kanto.
"Café?"
Giovanni stared at the image of [A Ray of Sunshine] on his tablet, lost in thought.
"Boss," Matori said, bringing him a cup of coffee.
"So… are you suggesting that Team Rocket should start with the food and beverage industry?" Giovanni murmured, narrowing his eyes.
After his last conversation with Johan, Giovanni had been considering ways to "rebrand" Team Rocket. He just hadn't found the right direction—until now.
Indeed.
No matter who you are or what your status is, you can't avoid "eating."
If Team Rocket could win the hearts—and stomachs—of the masses, they could garner widespread support.
Win over the common folk, and they'd effectively corner the Pokémon League.
The biggest gap between Team Rocket and the League wasn't just the strength of their elites; it was the size of their base.
"Change our approach. Weave a net from the bottom up," Giovanni mused, feeling it was worth trying.
"Matori," he said suddenly, "would you like to help Johan with his café?"
After all, she seemed to have a knack for making desserts.
"Eh?"
Matori froze. Was he seriously asking her to assist Johan with his café?
She wasn't entirely against the idea—she could even learn some recipes from Johan—but leaving Giovanni's side…
Pressing her lips together, she hesitated, unsure how to respond.
Giovanni noticed her reluctance and nodded. "I understand. Changing secretaries would disrupt too many operations."
Besides, this task was better suited for someone unfamiliar—less likely to bring unnecessary trouble to Johan.
"Let's send them instead," Giovanni decided.
"Them?"
Matori immediately thought of three individuals.
Were they really up to the task?
[Eevee Eats Cabbage]: Congrats on the opening!
[Grain in the Field]: Come by for a coffee!
[Eevee Eats Cabbage]: I'm not in Sinnoh right now—went to Unova.
[Grain in the Field]: Unova?
[Eevee Eats Cabbage]: Yeah, I've got an exhibition match with Caitlin.
Caitlin, the future Psychic Elite Four of Unova, and one of the few who could match Sabrina in psychic prowess.
[Grain in the Field]: Good luck… and try not to make her cry.
[Eevee Eats Cabbage]: Garchomp death glare.jpg
Johan chuckled at the emoji on his screen.
"Johan, we'll be heading out now."
Erika stood with Brock, Wally, and Wally's classmate, ready to return to Celadon University.
"Want me to see you off?" Johan asked, pocketing his phone.
"No need," Erika said with a sweet smile. "After all, we'll see each other at the festival soon."
Festival?
Johan paused, watching the four of them wave goodbye.
"Gengar," he called, "see them off for me."
Wearing a server's uniform and cleaning a table, Gengar crossed its arms.
"Ka-kah~~"
I'm busy, you know.
But despite its protests, Gengar floated off to escort the group.
Johan wiped the sweat from his brow.
"Phew… it's been a hectic day."
Still, he believed the busyness was just because it was opening day. With no standout features or fame, the café would likely quiet down soon.
After all, it wasn't like everyone could be like Steven, who casually ordered twenty cups of coffee at 500 Pokédollars each.
He'd deliberately set affordable prices post-opening.
At the end of the day, Johan considered himself first and foremost a teacher, a Pokémon psychologist, a trainer…
How did he end up with so many roles?
Outside the café, Gengar stood with hands on its hips, deep in thought.
Johan's new business venture pleased it, but Johan's lack of drive didn't.
So…
Click!
Gengar snapped a photo of the café's storefront and floated into a nearby print shop.
The moment Gengar phased through the closed door, the room's temperature plummeted.
The shopkeeper, a middle-aged man, turned pale.
"Ka-kah~~"
Gengar flashed its crimson tongue, a mischievous grin on its face.
"Y-you… robbing me?" the shopkeeper stammered, sweat pouring down his forehead.
Robbery?
Gengar tilted its head.
Not a bad idea…
But remembering Johan's disapproving glare, it shivered, holding up the photo of the café instead.
"Drooo?"
A Smeargle working in the shop noticed and approached Gengar.
"Ka-kah!"
Realizing it had found a kindred spirit, Gengar gestured wildly.
Smeargle nodded in understanding, its tail-paintbrush moving deftly. In no time, it had recreated the photo on its easel.
"Drooo!"
"Ka-kah!"
Satisfied, Gengar instructed Smeargle to turn the image into a promotional flyer.
The collaboration resulted in a stack of striking posters, much to the bewilderment of the shopkeeper.
Gengar left the store with its prize, humming happily.
Instead of returning to the café, Gengar headed to a dark alley a few streets away.
Red eyes glinted in the shadows as it approached.
Gengar smirked, summoning a swirling Shadow Ball in one hand.
"Woo…"
The menacing Pokémon scattered, revealing a ragtag group of wild and rogue Pokémon, including a Krookodile, all bowing respectfully.
Boss Gengar!
With a "boom," Gengar pulled out its posters and handed them out.
"Ka-kah~~"
Distribute these everywhere by tomorrow! I want to see them on every street!
Walking out of the alley afterward, Gengar sighed contentedly.
If this café succeeds, it's all thanks to me. Johan? He's useless.
At Rustboro Pokémon Academy.
"Principal!"
The dean of academics, Martin, entered the principal's office to find the principal battered and bruised, sitting quietly at his desk.
Beside him, a Pangoro crossed its arms, glaring menacingly.
Martin: "..."
"Ah, Martin," the principal said, forcing a smile. "What's the matter?"
"Ahem."
Ignoring the principal's state, Martin said, "I've heard Celadon University is offering big money to recruit Johan."
"Hmm…"
"Principal!" Martin exclaimed. "We can't lose him—our admissions strategy depends on him!"
"Good point," the principal agreed.
"Then shouldn't we—"
The principal smiled again, wincing as his bruised face protested.
"Celadon University doesn't understand Johan. A man so deeply connected to Pokémon wouldn't care about material things."
"But he still needs money and resources to train them!"
"Good point."
Martin: "..."
"While we can't just hand him cash as an institution, we can raise his salary," the principal mused. "And since he runs a café, why not place regular orders as a school?"
Standing up slowly, he declared, "Teach a man to fish, Martin."
"Understood!"
Back at the café, Johan noticed Gengar was still missing and pulled out his phone to call.
Before he could, a message popped up on his screen:
[Young Man]: It's so boring here… I can't even think about thinking.
Johan frowned at his old, glitchy phone, replying:
[Grain in the Field]: Where are you? I'll buy you coffee.
----------
Powerstones?
For 20 advance chapters: patreon.com/michaeltranslates