This Isn't Canon! (Or that time I reincarnated into an AU-Naruto)

Staring at nothing for eternity was utterly boring. Trust her, she'd know. After dying of cancer just like her grandfather before her, she had come here, as a translucent little soul. There were no stars, no purple wavering energy, no time and space fluctuations, nothing. All she could see was nothing. But that was not maddening. No - what was maddening was when a soul DID come, they were only here for a small blink of time, before some kind of tentacle monster, glowing golden god, or stupid blue box popped up. It had happened thousands of times but for her? Nothing.

Heck, by the time she moved close enough they'd both be gone! But not this time - no. For you see…

-CHANGE-

Within the void two figures one small and translucent, and one titanic and glowing floated, in the midst of conversation. "Yes, yes. Congratulations. You've spun wonderful powers, and have spun and landed on going to Naruto. Now, it's off you go onto your next journey!"

The young man in soul form was practically drooling. "Reincarnating into Naruto before he was a genin? Perfect! Think of the harem I could form! I'll be the hero who saved the world!" His soul form was jittery as if he was jumping up and down, except for the fact that he was a soul in the Great Void between Realities, and the conventional laws of physics did not exist here.

The titanic luminous being didn't seem to react to the words of the soul, "Now off you g-" as the R.O.B rose their hand to send the soul off onto their next world,

"GET FUCKED!" Another soul which was clearly feminine did a perfect roundhouse kick to the head of the male soul, sending him flying off into the void. Now in his place, a golden light whisked the feminine soul off onto their next life, leaving a dazed soul, and an utterly confused R.O.B

"Bu-but. My Isekai!" At the same time,

"My reincarnation energy! Fuck! I was sending someone incompetent so that the Universe would be ruined, how did a mortal soul even sneak up on me?!?" But, that was a conversation to be peered at perhaps at a different time. For now…

-CHANGE-

"Hahahahaha! I can't believe that worked! Finally! I'm freeeeee!" Whisked off into the distance by the golden energy surrounding her, she practically sobbed from glee. "Finally! I'm finally free…" Repeating herself once more spectral tears would waft down from her translucent eyes, as her soul shook for a few moments before she contained herself.

"Right. Calm down, now what did the big guy say? Naruto? Heh, I woulda worked with anything as long as I could get out of there!"

With that, she closed her eyes and fell into a slumber, awaiting her next life as the golden energy transported her to her next life.