Yennefer's Hell (Revised)

Slowly opening her eyes, Yennefer observed the luxurious room in which she was, mentally and physically tired, Yennefer let out a sigh of relief, that yesterday had not been just a dream.

Yesterday was very complicated, it was the strangest day Yennefer has ever experienced on her journey, but it was also the day that changed everything in her life.

Looking at the person next to her, Yennefer had a genuinely happy smile on her lips, all her search had yielded results, she found what she had always been looking for.

Yennefer felt an inexplicable happiness, she finally found what she was looking for.

Running her delicate hand through the person's gray hair, Yennefer felt a tightness in her chest, looking at him who was in that situation.

Covered in bandages, he slept peacefully, Yennefer knew him and knew that he was only relaxed in that way because he trusted her.

Feeling a little guilty about what happened to him, Yennefer was afraid of hurting her already weakened body.

Observing her face brought her peace of mind, Yennefer felt security and affection when seeing her next to her, even if she was in that situation.

Thoughtfully, Yennefer remembered all the events that led her to that moment.

Her gold and influence were no longer enough for her, she was alone, loneliness hurt her a lot.

Almost giving up on her goal, Yennefer had already tried so hard and didn't get the result she wanted.

Feeling lonely, Yennefer had a genuine desire for true human affection, this desire was always denied, even her parents rejected her.

She didn't know what true love was, everyone who approached her either despised her or had hidden desires.

Some were after her beauty and status, others wanted her skills and talents, no one ever valued her for who she was.

Yennefer desperately tried to get the love she heard so much about, but her desire was always denied.

All her attempts ended in failure, no one really cared for her, they were after the benefits they could get by associating with her.

Even with all her effort, Yennefer's last attempt to get affection also failed.

With all her attempts, Yennefer discovered that the easiest true affection to obtain was from a blood family.

And as she couldn't do that with the family she was born into, Yennefer decided to start her own family, she wanted to have a daughter.

However, Yennefer knew that there was a big obstacle, to fulfill her wish, after the sorceresses, the transformation by magic, were sterile.

Yennefer knew this, she did everything she could to cure her infertility, she studied a lot, took tests, she spoke to several great friends.

But nothing she discovered indicated a path for her to pursue her search for a cure, until he found out about the Djinns.

Yennefer spent years researching Djins, their appearances throughout history and the sorceresses who had encounters with these beings.

She has studied theories made by other Sorceresses about how to trap a Djin and turn him into her slave, but none of these theories have been tested.

Whatever she was going to do would be a test, and she didn't know if it would work, but Yennefer didn't care about the risks, her desire for true affection was greater than her attachment to life.

So she went out to all the places where there were reports of Djinn sightings, in search of these beings.

Traveling through various Kingdoms and uninhabited places, she passed by any place that had any signs of Djinns.

Passing through Temeria where she met her old acquaintance Triss Merigold, Yennefer found a true friend in her, but friendship was not enough for Yennefer, she wanted a family.

After Temeria she passed through Novigrad, where she met a respected nobleman and future ambassador to Redania, the man named Beau Berrant.

She also went to Aedd Gynvael which is a rich town in Narok where she met her ex-lover Istredd.

In search of love, Yennefer got involved with some men, but they all disappointed her.

With the time she spent with these men, Yennefer was sure that if she lost everything she had, which was her beauty, power and influence, they would abandon her.

These cases reinforced her desire to have a child, who she would love and be loved in return.

Yennefer traveled through most of the kingdoms looking for clues of a Djin.

Traveling from Vizima to Cintra and Kovir she learned more in these places about the appearances and powers of the Djinns than in her solitary studies.

She even found an artifact said to be very effective against elementals, in a ruin, where she discovered more about the powers of the Djinns.

It is not known exactly how powerful Djins are, but it is believed that they are capable of manipulating reality to make any wish come true.

Yennefer discovered information about two powerful sorceresses, who imprisoned Djins and made them their slaves, but after a while they disappeared without a trace.

One disappeared near Skellige and the other disappeared in the Kingdom of Redania, the one that disappeared in Skellige, there are no clues as to where he could have ended up.

In Redânia, rumors pointed to a small town called Rinde, which was the last place where the witches were seen.

Deciding her plan of action, Yennefer goes towards Rinde, she will talk to her acquaintance Beau who owed her some favors.

She would need a powerful acquaintance in that place, Yennefer needed some support, so she could take shelter with an ambassador.

Kingdom of Redania was a place not very favorable to witches, she would need someone to protect her.

After a while in Rinde Yennefer felt the unfriendly atmosphere of the place, everyone looked at her with contempt on their faces, it was difficult for her to alleviate this feeling among the locals.

Yennefer had to help many beginners and people to be accepted there, thus listening to some rumors, which took her to some places where she studied and obtained some clues.

With great difficulty she managed to obtain information about the Djin and his master, who at first was nothing more than an itinerant merchant.

Who happened to find the Djin's container, the wishes were not specified, but Yennefer was sure of at least one of his wishes.

Her research led her to the entrance of a cave, which was magically linked to a castle, where the sorceress was carrying out experiments.

Arriving there, Yennefer realized that the structure was full of dimerium, which they used to create a powerful spell.

Something had created the place to be a trap for sorceresses, the place sucked elemental energy, preventing the use of spells.

When Yennefer was investigating the place, looking for answers, a golem appeared at the scene, it was chasing Yennefer who was injured as she fled, luckily Kakashi appeared and saved her.

Together the two defeated the golem, it was at that moment, Yennefer didn't know it, but that person who saved her changed her life completely.

Seeing Kakashi introduce himself, Yennefer realized that he was just a little boy, in her moment of despair she thought he was a dwarf.

Confused by that and his introduction, she wanted to introduce herself too, but when Yennefer was about to introduce herself, something happened.

Her head felt light, she was dizzy, almost falling to the ground, Yennefer heard a voice in her head.

"Congratulations on the first test you passed, in this next test you will have to face your worst nightmares, you will have to overcome yourself at every moment".

After that mysterious voice sounded in their heads, they felt their heads go blank, they both fell unconscious.

At that moment, neither of them knew it, but that was the event that brought them together, with a very strong and solid bond.

After the blackout in her mind, Yennefer found herself trapped in her worst nightmare, she returned to the worst moment of her life, her childhood, and relived her personal hell.

For a long time Yennefer cursed the gods and on the day she was born, May 1, 1173, that day reminded her of her cursed existence.

Her childhood had few good moments, the bad moments were the biggest part of her childhood.

The so-called good times were those when she was simply ignored.

Her father and her village mistreated her, with words and using physical blows, the only person who was by her side was her mother, but this also changed over time, Yennefer was abandoned by everyone.

With the deformities in her body, Yennefer was seen as a monster by everyone, at first her mother tried to hide her repulsion at Yennefer's appearance.

But over time she no longer hid her disgust, she went from showing unpleasant expressions to abusing Yennefer with words and actions.

In the small village where Yennefer lived, a rumor spread that she had some mixed-race disease, her mother was half-elf, and that's why she was born deformed like that.

She was treated like a pest, no one wanted to get close to her anymore, when the other children saw her they threw stones and rubbish, trying to keep her away.

During this period of her life, Yennefer isolated herself in her home, not going out for anything else, depression hit her, every day she asked the gods to take her out of that world.

When the rumors reached her father, her situation worsened even further, her food was reduced to a minimum, he forced her to work hard and the beatings became more frequent.

It was as if he was punishing her for something she had no control over, her life was miserable, Yennefer began to think that she committed a great sin and that's why the gods were punishing her.

And that if she endured this ordeal she would be rewarded in some way, her mind clung to this fact in the worst stages of her childhood.

Every day she was reminded that she was born deformed, her father hated her since she was born, he blamed her for being mixed race.

Her mother loved and protected her when she was younger, but her father beat her constantly, almost every day, and her mother initially came to her rescue.

Believing that Yennefer was born by the will of the gods, but this changed when her father left them for another woman, after which her mother beat her every day.

The beatings and insults became more frequent, Yennefer also began to be punished with a lack of food.

Yennefer's situation worsened every year, her pain throughout her body increased with each birthday she celebrated.

She felt an inexplicable weakness, tasks that she did without much difficulty were becoming tiring for her.

Her deformities also worsened, as Yennefer increasingly believed she was becoming a monster.

Her suffering was so great that Yennefer cried out for death every night, but she was never heard by the gods.

Even so, they continued to prolong her suffering, cursing her existence, Yennefer always wondering why she was born.

Thoughts like, if I hadn't been born a filthy half-breed, if I had been a normal human, I wouldn't have suffered like this.

They were always present in her head, every night she slept in pain and hunger.

After years of that torture that Yennefer called life, she began to think that she deserved all that suffering.

For her, the sin of being born mixed race was too high, which is why she was treated that way.

That's why the gods didn't listen to her, refusing to end her miserable existence.

Believing that she was born to suffer and that she should suffer until death, Yennefer thought that only then would her sins be forgiven.

When Yennefer turned nine, she saw people her age passing by and playing with other children, some passing by with their parents while they were having fun.

As she watched the couples pass by, she kept dreaming of someone who would love her even if she was a freak.

But unfortunately for Yennefer, the world was too focused on appearances, few people would love someone based on her personality.

Beauty was without a shadow of a doubt the first thing that would attract another human being.

Yennefer knew that her appearance was repulsive to most people, but she had a small hope of being loved by someone.

Together they would have a child, and they would be a big family, that was her dream, that was what kept her sanity alive.

But because Yennefer lost hope of having a normal life, she had to accept her suffering just so she could have a life with less pain and regret.

She knew she couldn't change her appearance, so she had to accept her life as it was.

With each passing year, deformities increased, one of her arms became larger than the other, her body became more crooked and misshapen.

As the years went by, she realized that every year she was getting weaker and her death was getting closer.

Yennefer was happy, she felt that in a short time she would be free from that miserable life.

But nothing happened as Yennefer wanted, when she turned ten, a woman appeared in her village.

Upon seeing Yennefer, she became interested which made her negotiate with Yennefer's mother, who sold her to this woman.

Even though she knew that her mother hated her and wanted to get rid of her as quickly as possible, Yennefer didn't want to believe that her own mother exchanged her for a little money.

Losing all hope he ever had that his mother would love her again, Yennefer followed the woman.

Moving in a catatonic state, Yennefer's mind was blank, his body just moved slowly following the woman.

Having nothing to take, all she had were her old, torn clothes, the woman talked to Yennefer.

But she couldn't hear, her mind was elsewhere, all the way until they left the village, Yennefer heard whispers about the two of them.

They said that the woman who bought it was a sorceress, and that they were taking it to do experiments.

The people of the village said that they were finally getting rid of the aberration in their village and that now their lives would improve.

Yennefer couldn't understand why they hated her so much, she never hurt them, the only thing she did was exist.

She didn't know why her existence was so hated, she wondered why these things only happened to her, what wrong she did with the gods, for them to punish her like this.

During the journey to the School of Sorceresses in Aretuza, Yennefer began to create new hope, starting to believe that she could lose her miserable life quickly.

After a long journey, she finally found herself in front of the Magic Academy, it was a huge and somewhat obscure castle, hidden from most people's eyes.

Arriving in Arentuza, thoughts about the possible horrors that awaited her crossed Yennefer's mind.

But contrary to what she imagined in that place, she was treated in a much better way than at home.

She was shown the place where she would live, Yennefer got a room with new and clean furniture, a very soft and comfortable bed.

The room had a small closet where she could store her things and a mirror, they gave her new, smelling clothes.

In a single day Yennefer gained things she never expected to have in her life, it seemed like a dream for Yennefer, she was treated like a human being.

Yennefer believed that she would finally have a different life, that she would find friends and people who cared about her.

For Yennefer it was like a dream come true, living that way, it was incredible at the beginning.

When you are given hope and then it is taken away from you, it is much worse than never having had hope for something better.

She was enjoying living in Arentuza, Yennefer had some people who approached her, she made friends with some girls.

But Yennefer felt that they didn't care much about her, they were approaching her, because of her possible abilities.

So when she didn't demonstrate the skills expected of her, Yennefer was abandoned by all of her friends.

They turned their backs on her and left her alone, once again she was ignored by everyone, as if she were nobody, once again she became invisible to everyone and was rejected.

Trying harder than anyone else to show her worth and be accepted by everyone again, Yennefer spent day and night trying to improve.

However, no matter how much she tried to improve and overcome her shortcomings, the result she expected never happened, and she continued to be rejected by everyone around her.

No matter how hard Yennefer tried, it seemed like she couldn't get anyone's approval, she still didn't have anyone.

Then one day, while training her spells, she was overcome by bad feelings and almost committed suicide.

(Spells are events that occur when elemental energy mixes with strong feelings controlled by the sorceress, many accidents occur because the sorceress can lose control of her feelings, or uses many spells that overload her head which can lead to her death by cause of stress).

When this happened, Yennefer was saved by the dean of the Arentuza Academy of Magic, Tissaia de Vries, who saw her talent and effort.

Tissaia realized that with Yennefer's willpower she had become a great sorcerres, so she became her mentor.

She was one of the few people who treated her well, but because of her sense of inferiority, and self-contempt, Yennefer believed that Tissaia didn't like her.

Believing that Tissaia was only interested in her talents, and that if she didn't make an effort to improve she would be abandoned again.

After taking Tissaia as her mentor, Yennefer saw her life change completely, whoever previously ignored her tried to be her friend again.

As a result, Yennefer became increasingly suspicious of humans, who only seemed to use people for their petty interests.

Over the next few months at the academy as she studied spells, Yennefer became friends with a talented and intelligent girl.

Sabrina Glevissig, the two came together out of convenience, as they would be powerful partners in the future.

So if they became friends, they could benefit from each other, it wasn't a true friendship, but it was the closest Yennefer had in her life.

During her years studying Magic Yennefer became close to three people besides her mentor Tissaia.

Her friend Sabrina, an apprentice sorceress named Triss Merigold, and an older boy named Istredd.

Yennefer knew he had only approached her because of her promising future.

But he at least didn't hide this one, so Yennefer thought it was more acceptable to have him around, rather than those fake people.

Yennefer graduated from the Magic Academy, receiving a huge celebration as she was considered a genius sorceresses.

That same day she became a sorceress recognized by the Brotherhood, her mentor cured her deformities.

Using a ritual that could give her beauty, but this ritual had an unimaginable price, she would have to pay something of equal value in the ritual.

The pain that Yennefer felt during the ritual was something that could not be described in words.

Finally without her deformities, Yennefer became a beautiful woman, how happy she would be if she had been born like this from the beginning, instead of being born a monster.

After she became this beautiful woman, Yennefer started to receive more attention from people, especially men.

This pleased her very much, Yennefer was happy for the first two years, but then she realized that this was not what she wanted.

Yennefer didn't want cheap attention from these people, she wanted someone who valued her for who she was and not for what she had.

She regretted the price she paid for this beauty, she exchanged her ability to conceive a child for this beauty.

She traded what could give her what she wanted most, which was a son, for something ephemeral like beauty.

As the years went by, her certainty that human beings were hypocritical creatures increased, everyone wanted to build friendships with her.

Knowing that they were only looking for benefits Yennefer, she didn't treat them very well, except for some people she found useful.

Wanting people to really care about her, but only people who wanted to use her approached her.

This attitude of these people made her sick, everyone who approached her only did so with ulterior motives.

They didn't care or like her, they had in mind what Yennefer could provide them in the future and that made her furious.

Yennefer knew she would have to live with this, she could no longer receive the love of a child so she would have to find someone who loved her for who she was.

Ever since I became beautiful, she tried to use that, to try to find someone who really loved her, but she couldn't trust anyone.

Everything was meaningless, nothing had value, her beauty, power and status, for Yennefer that didn't matter anymore, life lost its shine.

She replayed this hell in her mind countless times, she no longer had the strength to resist, she just wanted it all to end, so when she was about to give up.

Kakashi appeared, he was nothing more than a gray-haired boy, took her hand and took her out of that hell.