Voice of heart

Jin and Kazuya remained together alone.

During their journey back to the pueblo, Kame explained to Jin, why the whole situation was so complicated and the reasons for him and Liwan to get so worried. As Manipi was the Tribal Chief´s oldest son, it was unthinkable to accuse him without a proper proof, which they didn´t have. Kame wanted to discuss it with the Chief personally, but he had no chance to talk with the old Indian since the incident. He was still troubled by it, even though Liwan promised to solve it with Flying Feather and the Council of Elders on his behalf.

After they had just made at least some agreement with Captain Walker, it would have been really inconvenient if the soldiers found out about Manipi being involved in the attacks on the railway. It would have put the whole Blackfeet Tribe in danger again.

Actually, Jin was not surprised even a little by that arrogant jerk having his part in the troubles with Sioux, but he had his doubts if it was true, that nobody else from the Indian tribe knew about it. But Kame seemed quite certain and Jin didn´t want to argue with him. On the other hand, he was more than prepared to discuss the upcoming meeting with the slowly approaching soldiers. He had absolutely no intention to let Kazuya go there alone.

It didn´t take them long to get to the pueblo. While Kame started to make all necessary preparations for their departure, Jin was assigned with the fire inside the wigwam and their meal. He was not very thrilled about letting all heavy things on Kame, but he knew that thanks to his still so weak hands with almost no nails, which only started to grow back, he would have been more a burden than a help. Sometimes, he really wished for being given more patience than he had.

*

Kame took a good care of the horses, covered the last campfire set outside with heavy branches, hid all unnecessary stuff into the hideout under the ground, and gathered all remaining wood and provisions at one place. He intended to put the last wigwam down right in the morning, as they would have frozen during the night without it. With each passed day, the temperature was getting down quite rapidly.

The dark was already falling upon the almost empty pueblo, when he went for some fresh water to the streamlet in the woods. Heading back to the wigwam, he was pondering if it really was a wise idea to march right to the soldiers unit and try to gather more information... But he could not think of any better plan.

There were some quiet and very unusual sounds coming from their shelter, which he recognized only when he had already reached the entrance, and his hand stopped in the middle of the movement for opening it. It was the strumming on the guitar.

There were some irregular gaps in the melody of a song, which he didn´t know, but it sounded nice anyway. Kame remained standing there, listening to the play. Somehow, it reached out to him, and made him get lost in it for a while, before the song ended and the following silence broke the spell.

He took a deep breath and made his legs and hand move again. The dark eyes focused on him right away, when he appeared inside the wigwam. Jin was sitting near the fireplace, still holding the instrument with a somehow depressed expression. And now Kame also realized, why the melody didn´t sound so well. Jin couldn´t play on it without nails; he could only try, using the plectrum instead.

"It sounded horrible, right?" Jin said with a sad grin. "It will take ages before I can play properly again," he huffed depressed, watching the red tips of his fingers.

Kame shook his head and put the water aside.

"Not ages, Jin," he objected softly. "It will take approximately two months before they will grow out again completely. Maybe a little more..."

"Oh, no, that´s even more than ages!" Jin whined hearing the information.

"It didn´t sound that bad at all," Kame tried to comfort him.

The dark glance narrowed suspiciously: "Really?"

The younger one nodded firmly: "Really. I liked it."

"Well, thanks..." the other one murmured and put the guitar back to its shelter. "I guess I should be grateful that Grenet didn´t manage to proceed to cutting my fingers off. Those would have hardly grown back again..."

Kame´s stomach clutched anxiously only at the idea that something like that might have happened. And the mention of Jin´s injuries reminded him that they had already missed the time for repeated greasing of the healing ointment.

He went to the side of wigwam, where he left his stuff and also the herbs and other things used for treating the wounds, while Jin moved to the opposite side very carefully, putting the guitar´s sheath away and started to search for something in his bag. Kame prepared the ointment and new bandages, turning back to see Jin still digging in his stuff.

"Damn, I´m sure it was here..."

"What are you looking for?" Kame asked and sat down next to the fire. "Lena might forget something in your room at the saloon."

"Lena?" Jin repeated slowly and turned his head. "Who´s Lena?"

"My friend from Bozeman. I asked her for getting your stuff instead of me," Kame explained. "She was the one who... who tried to help my mother. I told you about it before."

"Ah, right," the older one turned the attention back to his things, continuing the search. "Hmm, I don´t think it was somewhere in the room. I´m sure I left it inside the bag..."

"You can try to find it later. We should put the new healing layers on you now," Kame suggested.

"Just a second... Yes, here it is!" Jin raised his hand in a victorious move, holding a small flask in it.

Kame raised his eyebrows, seeing that wanted treasure: "It´s not what I think it is, right?"

"Depends on what you think it is," Jin grinned, sneaking back to his place.

The younger one frowned strictly, trying to ignore that almost cute expression Jin had: "You said that it was your last one before..."

"Well, fortunately, I was clever enough to buy more from dear Harada," more than a satisfied reply came. "He said this is the best whiskey in the west."

"You shouldn´t drink alcohol yet," Kame scolded the other one, but he couldn´t make himself to say it more coldly.

"Why not? What damage can it do?" Jin asked him curiously, already opening the full bottle.

"Well..." Kame hesitated and from some reason, he couldn´t think of anything as serious, so that he could forbid Jin to drink.

"I thought so..." Jin´s lips spread in an amused smile. "Cheers!"

Kame watched the bottle´s top attaching to the red mouth. Then Jin let the swallow of liquid go in and he saw, how the muscles on the older one´s neck moved, when he gulped it down. He caught himself staring at Jin´s skin in the gold light of fire and he almost freaked out at the idea, that he would not be able to stay calm, when he had to touch it, even if it was for the medical treatment only.

"Here," Jin´s voice interrupted the crazy flow of his stupid ideas.

The older one was offering him the drink and this time, Kame didn´t even think about refusing it. Hoping it would help him calm down a little; he took the bottle and pressed it to his lips. He took a long gulp, almost spitting it out right away, when he realized whose lips were just touching the very same place only seconds ago.

"Are you all right?" Jin was observing him with the cautious expression, when Kame started to cough the liquid out from his lungs. "It´s not that bad, I think..."

"Yeah, I´m fine, thanks, Jin," Kame replied hastily, as soon as he could catch his breath again, but he avoided the dark look, while handing the flask back.

The alcohol burnt his throat and landed in his empty stomach with the eager effort to get into his blood as soon as possible. It looked like that it was his evening of bad ideas. Kame took the bottle of water instead, cooling himself down a little. A short pause, and avoiding looking at Jin, helped him relax. He could handle this, somehow...

"I wonder... Do Indians make any alcohol?" Jin asked with his eyes focused on the small bottle, probably regretting he didn´t buy more.

Kame couldn´t suppress an amused laughter: "You can wonder about that later," he assured him. "Now, we will check your wounds."

Jin put on a hurt expression, but left the flask aside obediently and still a little convulsively started to undress his shirt. Kame got up and knelt down behind him with the ointment and new bandages in his hands.

Jin stripped the cloth down slowly and revealed his back to Kame, who focused on removing of old bandages to uncover the long signs of injuries after whipping, which, to his great relief, were healing very well. The shallow ones were colored in the purple and blue. The deeper ones already had a new skin replacing the scabs, which was a really good sign. After that horrible infection got into them, it could have looked much worse.

Kame got some ointment on the tips of his fingers.

"I think we can leave it without the covers finally," he said just to break that thick silence, which fell on the wigwam suddenly and touched the first mark to grease the mass on it. Jin´s skin was warm and his back firm.

"That´s great to hear," there was a response from the mouth, which Kame couldn´t see. "Those bandages are getting on my nerves."

"Don´t grumble, Jin, they speed up the healing," he reacted, taking the proper care of each wound.

Jin murmured something again, but didn´t protest anymore. Kame could feel the steady movement under his fingers, caused by Jin´s breathing and there was still that tension in his stomach, but it was calmed down by alcohol, which finally had some effect. He was really glad for taking the gulp now and maybe he would welcome even more.

"All right..." he said when he was finished and moved a little to sit beside Jin this time, focusing his eyes at the arms. "Let´s look at these..."

From the very beginning, Liwan took really good care of all deep cuts, so that they were without any infection and were healing fast and clearly.

"Let me see your hands now," Kame decided to proceed on the next phase. "Did you put them into that herbal mixture as I told you?"

"Of course, doc," Jin replied mockingly and raised his left hand first.

Kame took it into his, feeling a little colder skin of Jin´s fingers and very carefully, put the portion of moisture on each nail bed.

"I´m glad you feel so well to make a fun of me," he murmured, determinedly focused only on Jin´s fingers, which were bigger and somehow harder than his, but still rested in his palm peacefully, without any restraint. "Be careful not to wipe it off," he said, when he let his hand go and reached for the other to do the same task.

"I will, I definitely want my nails back," Jin reacted gloomily.

"Patience, Jin," he emphasized.

"You know I´m not good at it," there was an immediate objection.

"Start to work on it then," Kame stated, letting the other hand go free. "Lie down; the back should be all right now. I have to check your stomach."

Jin didn´t say anything more and just obeyed. Kame leant to his stomach, noticing that the small burns on the bare chest already healed properly and most of the bruises faded into the light blue color. The older one looked better each day and Kame couldn´t even describe how grateful he was for it, when he still had the fresh memory of the tortured body on his mind.

Uncovering one of the worst wounds from all those which were caused to Jin, Kame could perceive his each movement even more clearly, and moreover he realized that Jin was keeping his eyes on him. With the hard lump in his throat, Kame took the old bandages away and carefully checked the wound, which still refused to accept the usual healing process. He could see the muscles partially, thanks to the destroyed layers of skin; it was dark red and ugly. The old shaman warned him that this one would take very long to heal.

He took the bowl, in which Liwan had prepared the correct herbs mixture in advance and he put it directly on the wound. It still had to hurt; he noticed the painful hissing escaping Jin´s mouth, even though the older one was suppressing it for sure.

"It will be unpleasant only for a moment," he said.

"Yeah, I know..." Jin breathed out.

Kame finished the treatment, wiped his hands into the clean towel and very carefully, he covered the wound with a new bandage.

"Stay like this for a while. I´ll bind it right away."

He wanted to get up again, but Jin´s hand on his forearm stopped him. Kame´s breath got imprisoned in his lungs for a second, before he was able to let it go out and looked at Jin.

The older one was watching him with the eyes so dark, that Kame was afraid he would sink in them. The touch of Jin´s palm was burning his skin and he just couldn´t move to get further from it.

"Thank you for taking care of me like this," Jin said quietly and there was something in his voice, what brought shivers into Kame´s stomach.

"We agreed on non-thanking, right?" he reproached to him softly.

The faint smile made the face of lying Jin even more irresistible.

"Right," he agreed and let his hand go.

Kame stood up on not exactly steady feet, finally getting away from the other one. First, he added some wood onto the fire, as he felt that the coldness from the outside was starting to get to them slowly and Jin didn´t need any discomfort. If it was only him, he wouldn´t put anything on it, as he felt more than hot already. Then he went to get another long bandage, putting the ointment and herbs back to the place.

He still felt that touch on his hand... He still felt that joyful excitement and anticipation, even when he was well aware of that it was foolish to feel like this. With a painful resignation, Kame took the bandage and returned to Jin. When he looked at him again, somehow he felt that Jin´s eyes were watching him all that time.

"Hold it a little," he instructed him to keep the healing cover on his stomach, while he was trying hard to cover his nervousness and reached out a hand to help him sit up.

Jin moved, with one hand holding the bandage on the place and with the other firmly grabbed his. Kame let it go as soon as Jin was in the sitting position and got himself a little closer, so that he could reach around his body to wrap the bandage properly.

When Kame leant in, he could feel Jin´s scent, mixed with medical herbs, the smoke from the fire and whiskey. By that movement, he got so close to the older one, that he could also feel his warm breath on his face. Like that, it was incredibly hard to keep his hands focused on wrapping the cloth around the body, which he yearned for, but he anxiously avoided Jin´s eyes, so that the other one would not see that desperate fight in him.

When Kame attached the end of the bandage below the layers, he moved away relieved that his tempting job was done for now, but once again he was stopped by the firm grip. Only this time, it was different...

Jin´s fingers squeezed him around the right wrist more firmly than was necessary and only then anxious Kame also noticed that the firm chest was moving up and down fast, in an unsteady pace of breathing.

"Jin?" he forced the name through the narrow throat and raised his eyes to meet the burning stare. And then he finally realized that Jin was having his own inner fight, too...

Every single time, when Kazuya´s fingers or other part of his body touched his, Jin felt it too clearly, as it outdid any other perception around. He could hear his own heartbeat rumbling in his ears, louder and stronger with almost each second during which Kame´s body remained so close to him.

He was spending hell a lot of energy just to stay motionless and let the younger one treat his wounds. But when Kazuya was binding that last bandage around his body, and he could feel the fragrance lingering from the younger´s hair and those slim arms around him, he just couldn´t bear that heat rising up inside him anymore.

It was as if Jin´s hand moved on its own will, when he caught Kame to stop him from moving away. And when those bright brown eyes focused on him and that soft voice said his name, Jin felt that he was losing the battle inside his chest and mind. But he was not upset about it at all...

He kept looking right into Kazuya´s eyes, locking their connection, and he moved with his other hand too, placing it on that beautiful face. His fingers touched Kame´s left ear first, before they ran across the cheek and stopped at the edge of his jaw.

Kazuya watched him wide eyed, stiffened like a stone, while it was still harder and harder for Jin to hold back. There were only a few inches between their faces now and Jin felt the gradually rising desire to close that space once and for all. And that desire was shutting up the remains of a certain reasonable voice, which was almost unrecognizable for some time already. Now, it felt like that if he did not follow his desire and achieve its goal, he would explode.

Jin moved with his hand again, going lower with it, on the back of Kame´s neck. And suddenly, he couldn´t move forward, even when he tried... It took him a moment to realize why. It was because Kazuya escaped Jin´s grip and placed both hands onto his chest. His touch was warm, but firm, and he was pushing Jin away. He looked at the younger one honestly confused.

"Jin..." Kame´s voice was significantly changed by emotions, that were swirling in his eyes and there was a haunted expression in them. "Don´t do this if you´re not sure about it."

He stared at the younger one; his heart suddenly clutched in the hard grip of anxiety.

"Kazuya, I..." he whispered hoarsely, not being able to continue.

"I cannot handle it if you push me away again," Kame added in a pleading voice. "I just cannot."

Then Jin understood why Kame was resisting him so desperately – he was afraid that it would end up the same way as the last time in the saloon.

He was looking into the younger´s warm eyes, remembering all those emotions, which were flooding him every time they touched in past few days, and realized that every single part of his body wanted to do only one thing. And Jin´s heart decided that it was just about time to screw up the usual manners. There was nobody around, who would judge him anyway.

Anxious Kazuya probably saw something from this decision in his eyes, because the pressure on his chest eased up and Jin moved forward again.

That faint voice, which was telling him that he was not supposed to do this was still there, somewhere in his mind, but Jin couldn´t care less about it, with Kazuya so close to him. He agreed with his heavily pounding heart, that there was nothing more important now and he had to show it to the other one, too.

That pain Jin had been through was good for one thing. It made him realize, what really mattered in his life. And it was not caring for what other people think.

Not to give any chance to his overworked mind to change this determination, he grabbed Kame´s hair firmly, so that the younger one couldn´t escape and closed the gap between them sooner than Kame could say anything else, pressing to the other´s lips in much more possessive way than he had ever expected from himself. He captured them urgently, hastily and with the suppressed desire, which was boiling in him as a volcano.

First time they had kissed, Jin didn´t think about it at all. He let himself be led by the strong attraction. This time, he was filled from head to toes with such a strong desire to do this and to convince Kazuya that he really wanted it, that he forgot to breathe. He was able to take some air inside his lungs only when Kame gave in to his demand, his whole body softened in Jin´s grip, with his palms resting on the older one´s chest.

When the younger one repaid Jin´s kiss, still a little hesitantly, going to meet it only carefully, he realized that Kame was not sure yet, but he refused to give it up. He let his other hand to join the first one, imprisoning Kame´s head completely and he let that flickering burning passion go free, when he started to conquer inside the warm mouth.

Kazuya seemed to be stunned, as he was not able to defend against Jin´s attack at all, and he let the elder's tongue to slip between his lips and teeth. When Jin reached the tip of Kame´s tongue with his, the excited quiver ran through him and he finally joined Jin, opening the mouth more, accepting his caressing and welcoming the forced intruder.

Jin´s heart responded with the excited acceleration, throbbing heavily against the cage of ribs, while his temperature went high faster than any shot of alcohol would cause. He didn´t fight his feelings anymore and he even happily let himself be consumed by them. Because that was how Jin felt like with Kazuya kissing him back in his arms – happy like never before.

Under the hot demand of Jin´s lips, Kame´s reason was flying off to some unimportant place quickly, flooded by excitement.

Till that moment, he believed that mainly he was the cause of that unnatural tension between them. He couldn´t command his mind to forget the strong affectionate feelings towards Jin, and behave normally in front of him. He remembered so well how nervous and confused Jin was, when they reached this point the last time and he was hoping he would be able to accept the older one´s wish to remain only friends.

But now... Feeling the conquering kiss, all his assumptions and decision were carried away within a mere moment.

Somewhere inside, Kame knew there were still doubts and uncertainty in Jin, and probably in his own crazily beating heart too, but there was no space for it now. As well as him, Jin wanted more than friendship, no matter if it was right or wrong. And he couldn´t fight it anymore. Couldn´t and neither wanted to.

While Jin kept holding his face, Kame slipped with his hands from the bare chest up to the neck, burying his fingers into the thick hair and responded to Jin´s caressing, savoring on what he yearned for but didn´t really believe he could get. But Jin was just proving him the opposite, and it was influencing him so much, that he couldn´t even focus on normal things as the breathing.

The shaking sensation from the connection of their lips and tongues was flooding them both. When they managed to tear apart finally, both Jin and Kazuya were gasping for breath heavily.

Jin opened his eyes slowly as the first, focusing them on that face right in front of him. The skin of Kame´s face was darker than usually, as well as the color of his lips, which tasted... so sweetly. Jin realized that he was practically squeezing the younger´s head within his palms and released the strong hold a little. It made Kazuya open his eyes too and he buried them into Jin´s.

They stared at each other for a few tense seconds, before they moved at the exactly same moment, uniting their lips together again, in a more passionate kiss than before.

Jin wanted to feel more of Kazuya and he found their sitting position uncomfortable. He removed his hands, slipping down the thin fabric of younger´s shirt, before placing them around the slim waist. He grabbed on it firmly, before he leant back and lied down, dragging Kame along.

He did it without thinking, and so suddenly that Kame couldn´t react in any other way than ending up on the top of him, but by mistake pressing his elbow on Jin´s stomach, right on the fresh bandage, which made Jin gasp in pain into their kiss. Breaking it and pulling himself apart from Jin´s lips, Kazuya raised his head up immediately and the worried look glanced through his excitement.

"Jin..." he forced through his throat hoarsely.

"I´m fine," Jin breathed out hastily, worried that Kame might want to change their position. He didn´t want to let it happen, despite the slight discomfort caused by not completely healed wounds. Any unpleasant feeling was suppressed by Kame´s chest resting on his.

But despite his statement, Kame moved up more, replacing one of his soft palms on Jin´s chest again, and supporting himself on the ground covered by furs, so that he would not rest on him with the full weight. Jin strengthened the hold on Kame´s waist.

"Don´t..." he urged, not being able to express himself more properly.

Kazuya was looking at him for a moment, while the long strands of his hair were making a nice frame around his face, before he leant down again, only much more carefully, and reduced the space between them again.

"I´m not going anywhere," he whispered just before he was the one conquering Jin´s mouth this time. Carefully, he only teased the red lips, not letting the older one have the lead, patting them slowly and softly, until Jin couldn´t handle it anymore.

Very impatiently, Jin let his right hand leave the place on Kame´s waist, going up with it, grabbing the younger´s hair a little roughly and pulling him closer, biting on Kame´s lower lip. A soft moan escaped the other´s mouth, the moan which flooded Jin with another wave of excitement. He didn´t even realize that his other hand slipped at Kame´s hip, fingers buried into the fabric of the trousers.

Jin let his tongue slip out again. Probing on the bitten place, he felt Kazuya´s body shaking and pushing itself to him more, willingly and eagerly. Crazily excited from the fact he had such an effect on the young man above him, Jin went even further soothing with his tongue across the upper lip too. Kazuya´s mouth opened invitingly again, but Jin let him wait, only teasing the corner of it, as the payback for Kame´s play before. With his thumb, he rubbed across Kame´s cheek, while the fingers of his other hand slipped under the shirt´s hem.

When the tips of his fingers touched soft and warm skin under it, Kame fidgeted shakily, and tried to move up his head to escape Jin´s sweet torture, but the older one didn´t let him. He squeezed Kazuya´s hair again and held him on the place, while caressing his lips again, pulling out another weak whimper, before he finally entered the hot cavern behind them. Kazuya didn´t hold back and sucked on the playful tongue, while his hand went down from Jin´s chest, very slowly, reaching his abdomen and stopping there.

Without realizing it, Jin huffed out unsatisfied and he felt Kame smiling into the kiss. So he wanted a fight then?

Jin let his fingers rub the soft skin, pushing the cloth up, revealing Kame´s back more. But right after that he was forced to take a shaky inhale, and he pulled away from the tempting lips, when he realized that Kame placed his hand down there, still through the fabric of trousers, but right on his crotch. Oh, bloody hell, he was hard...

"Kame..." he almost choked on the name, when the younger one increased the pressure. Only this much was enough to raise his hot excitement. "Holy..." he couldn´t speak, as the words stuck in his throat.

"Do you trust me?" Kazuya asked with the fire in his eyes, but the corners of his lips were curved down hesitantly.

Jin sank deep into the brown eyes, his breathing fast and shallow, and feeling Kazuya´s hand down there made him wish for more...

"Yes..." he exhaled heavily. "Yes, I do..."

Kame moved his head closer, his warm breath touching Jin´s cheek.

"Don´t move then..." he whispered.

"What...?" the rest of sentence died out on Jin´s lips, when Kame unbuttoned the lying one´s trousers, a little clumsily with only one hand, but still fast. With that slightly nervous expression, he slipped under it, his small fingers touching Jin´s pride directly, not stopped by any annoying fabric anymore.

Jin´s mind was going somewhere high up so fast, that it would amaze him, if he was not too busy by handling his growing arousal.

"Kazuya..." the other one´s name escaped his mouth as a shaky whisper.

Kame´s head went even lower, his lips almost touching Jin´s ear, while his hand caressed along the whole shape of the hard cock slowly and so damn gently, that he felt some unbelievably warm flood going up from it to his chest and neck and mind.

"Do you want me to stop?" Kame´s shaking voice raised the question, which almost frightened Jin.

"Hell, don´t," he managed to breathe out hastily. "Don´t stop..."

Another, a little stronger stroke pulled a moan from Jin.

"I will not," Kazuya spoke again, breathing unsteadily, fondling across the tip of Jin´s hard member with his thumb, "do anything what you wouldn´t want to."

Jin only managed to nod shortly. He was not able to control his breathing or his heart, or anything else at all. With his eyes half-closed, he just let his hands rest on Kame´s back and around the neck. Somewhere on the edge of his mind, Jin couldn´t believe, how easily Kame´s touches were bringing him closer to the top of the hot wave. The movement of his fingers; each of them more firm and sure than the previous one, were literally paralyzing his brain. They were making his senses, except that blinding feeling, numb.

His hands fell down alongside his body, when Kame shifted. The young man above him moved his body lower, pulling the older one´s trousers down and his head stopping at the level of his crotch, while Jin was not able of any proper thinking anymore. The warm wet cage instead of fingers around his member stole him of anything else but burning passion, which was pleading to be set free. It was hot, so hot and stronger than anything what he had felt before.

Only subconsciously, led by the rising excitement, Jin moved his hands slowly, burying them into the hair of the one, who was making him feel so incredibly. He was going so high that he felt the crazy dizziness, but he was not afraid of it.

Wet and hot movements along the full length of his hard member were unsure at the start, but with Jin getting closer and closer to the edge, got confident and faster. Jin´s lips created the form of Kazuya´s name only inaudibly, his fingers squeezing in the soft hair, just before he came...

*

Kame´s heartbeats were so heavy, that he heard them as dull, almost painful beats in his ears, while his whole face was colored red with the fast flow of blood in his veins. Since he had felt Jin´s hard and hot arousal, he was engulfed with the urge to prove the older one that his decision was right, that what they were doing was all right, and that he could make Jin feel so good, that it just couldn´t be wrong... And he needed to prove it to himself, too.

He didn´t think about it further, as he was worried that he might change his mind. He was so damn nervous; the anxiety clutched his stomach into a small ball. But once he had started, he couldn´t hold back anymore. Especially when Jin didn´t protest at all.

Jin´s cock was so hard and soft at the same time, throbbing in his hold and then inside his mouth, reacting on every single impulse. Kazuya made himself stop thinking and focused on that hot arousal, which begged to be satisfied. He was more than willing to fulfil that request the best way he only could. He wanted to do that for Jin, to assure him, that there were much better things than what he had been through recently. There were stronger feelings than pain.

Jin was breathing heavily, the excited moans escaping his lips, as he was holding him, the fingers squeezing Kame´s hair, and his face was getting dark and body was flooded with the shaking waves. And Kame was indescribably happy, that he was the cause of what Jin felt...

*

It was a blinding eruption; it was like floating in the hot sparkling air.

Jin´s mind remained on that paradise place for a few long moments before going back down again, only very slowly and unwillingly. Gradually, he was able to perceive Kazuya´s warm skin and soft breathing again. At that moment, somewhere in his mind he realized that there was no woman who could make him feel like this. No woman ever.

With his eyes closed, he let himself being carried on by the fading sensation back to the real world. He still felt a little unreal. Jin couldn´t understand, how came that his brain, which just started to work slowly, was turned off so easily. Actually, he was so surprised and pleasantly tired, that he didn´t want to think much and tried to push the reality away, so that he could escape into sleep.

There was some shifting next to him and then a quiet and somehow careful voice close to his left ear, which pulled him up to his senses again: "How did it feel?"

"Fucking amazing," Jin breathed out without thinking about it twice.

A warm exhale of relief tickled him on the cheek: "Good. I´m glad..."

There was something in that voice, what he couldn´t miss and what made him wonder about it. Jin opened his eyes and turned his head to face Kazuya, who was lying just next to him on his side, with a small happy smile on his swollen lips.

"You mean that...?" Jin started hastily before the next words squeezed in his throat, as he suddenly felt anxious to talk about things like that. "That you have never..."

Kame´s smile faded away and he seemed to be a little nervous now, too. He straightened up, and remained sitting next to Jin, but his eyes were focused somewhere on the wigwam´s wall.

"No," he replied in a quiet voice. "This was the first time I... I did this."

Jin was honestly baffled. He sat up too, very slowly, as his stomach muscles were restrained a little. He noticed that Kame covered the lower part of his body with the blanket.

"Then how did you know...? How...?" he couldn´t make himself say it out aloud, but Kame knew, what he meant, as his face blushed. He looked even more adorable like that.

"Well... Somebody else did it to me, once..." a very hesitant reaction came from the younger one.

Jin stared at him, stiffened by the sudden pinch of jealousy. So, somebody else already made Kazuya feel... this? There was somebody else whom Kame would let go that far? Or did he mean a girl?

"Who is it?" a sharp question fell from his frozen lips. He just couldn´t suppress the upset disappointment, although he was not ready to admit, why he felt like that.

"Who was it," Kazuya corrected him sadly. "He passed away during the smallpox epidemic... It was just a drift, Jin, we were only kids then."

The emotions were changing inside Jin like a swing.

And here you´re, jealous about a dead boy... he almost slapped himself for being so selfish.

"Sorry that I asked about it," he mumbled, feeling awfully for spoiling the mood. "I thought that maybe Liwan..."

Kame´s eyes widened: "What? No! Liwan is my best friend, we have never..." the younger one´s face got even redder if possible. "Although he has no problem with stuff like this..."

This time it was Jin, who stared at the younger one shocked: "What do you mean by that?"

Kame fidgeted a little, throwing a short glance at Jin.

"You should know something about Indians, Jin," he stated in a serious, but still hesitant tone. "They don´t consider the relationship between men as... some disease as the white nation does. Within the tribe, it´s something... normal."

Jin let the information sink into to him and processed it for a while, not sure about what to think about it yet. There were only two things he was sure about at the moment. He still thought that homosexuality was something against the natural order of things, he just couldn´t get that out of his head so easily. But on the other hand, what he felt when they kissed, or during what Kame was doing with him was... So beautiful and awesome, that he couldn´t find anything wrong about it anymore, even when he tried. Who decided that getting intimate with the person of the same sex was wrong, when you liked the other one, anyway?

"But I understand your... point of view..." Kame looked as if he wanted to shrink himself, when Jin kept silent and he noticed that his uncertainty came back. "I won´t rush you... If you still think that..."

After that Jin didn´t let Kazuya talk more. He realized it was him again, who managed to somehow hurt the younger´s feelings. Just after what happened it was pretty stupid. So, he did the first thing, which came to his mind, and about which he hoped that could make it right. He reached out, placed his hand on Kazuya´s face and placed a gentle kiss on those worried lips.

Kame went silent, looking at him with shining eyes, when Jin pulled away a little, only so that he could speak, even though he was not sure if he was able to say it properly.

"I admit I still have doubts, Kazu..." he whispered, leaning with his forehead to the other´s. "But there´s one thing I know for sure. And that is I want you."

He kept looking into those goldish eyes firmly, until a faint smile appeared on the face in front of him again. Jin was surprised by himself, that he really said it, but that was the truth. His whole being wanted Kazuya and he was determined not to let anything and anyone take him away.

"That sounded quite possessively," Kame reacted slightly amused.

"You´re yet about to find out just how possessive I am," Jin assured him and with that he captured those sweet lips again.

When that fire of excitement, which brought Kame to overcome his usual borders and act according to how the passion led him, he was overpowered by nervousness again. What if he rushed things too much? What if it was too early for Jin?

But seeing his relaxed face and hearing the words calmed him down, before Jin started to ask questions. Remembering they were three once – he, Liwan and Wenity – it made him sad. The pain from the loss of a childhood friend was long gone, but his mood still sank low, when the memory of the brave boy – four years older than him, open to any adventures and experiments – appeared in front of him. He used to be so lively and he was taken away by something so... trivial on the first sight.

Jin looked confused and curious at the same time, so Kame was eager to explain his attitude more closely and got anxious again, before Jin decided to persuade him in his own way. That kiss was so nice and tender that it erased Kame´s uneasiness quite quickly. Jin´s touch meant more to him than thousand words.

Up until recently, he felt guilty for yearning for more than just friendship, but that feeling was gone, since he found out that Jin desired for something more, too. Though, for the older one it was a tougher inner fight and Kame couldn´t help, but being happy that this kissing-him side of Jin won.

His overworking mind turned off, when Jin´s lips pressed against his reassuringly again. He repaid the kiss slowly, and only shortly, before he separated himself from the temptation. It was a long day and they needed to rest.

He forced Jin to lie down again gently. Then he followed and pulled a blanket over them, letting one of his hands rest on not completely healed chest.

Jin pulled Kazuya closer with one hand and exhaled softly, content like a fed kitten.

"What time do we have to get up?" he asked murmuring sleepily, his hand running slowly across Kame´s back.

"Don´t worry about it," Kame responded. "I´ll wake you up."

"All right," Jin agreed more than willingly and closed his eyes.

"Good night, Jin," Kame said in a quiet voice, listening to the beat of the other´s heart.

"...night, Kazu..."

And both feeling happy and safe, in each other´s arms, fell asleep together.