409. Surprise! ~No Man's Land Part IX~
Erina kept on battling against the giant Toffee.
Gabrielle and Jotaro fly toward Toffee's face and attack him from different areas, zooming in the air and tearing Toffee apart.
Finn attacks with Come Along With Me. Jake fights along with Finn, enlarging his body to attack Toffee.
Spongebob shoots bomb bubbles at Toffee, destroying his leg.
Patrick enlarges himself and attacks Toffee.
Gumball shoots coins at Toffee's legs, injuring him while riding Darwin who is a unicorn using Gentleman to shoot Toffee.
Narcos uses his frozen Toffee-Buster armor. However, he begins yelling as he enlarges a giant suit. The suit then kicks Toffee back a few steps.
Shizuka shot at Toffee from below, managing to injure him.
Meanwhile...
The second group began running toward Toffee.
"Not. So. Fast," sneered Al Cado, standing in front of the second group. "If Toffee dies, I won't get to do what I need to do..."
"That is true for all of us..." said Burntrap. "It will make it easier for us."
The group prepared to attack.
"Would you really want to attack us?" asked Twitter.
"Yeah..." said PB.
"You're going down the same size as my dick," said Morty. "S-Six feet under."
"And you're gonna break like your father's asshole from what I did to her last night," said Rick.
"And you're going in a hotter place than my ass," said F.F. "Hell."
"Leave now..." said General Ahasan. "And we mayhaps spare you."
"No way..." said Marceline. "After the people that you've killed, why would we? You're under arrest."
"Or dead," shrugged Peter.
"Peter... Fucking chill," said Irene.
"Yeah. 'Chill,'" said Bruce.
Al Cado, General Ahasan, Twitter, White-Face, Enya Enyaba, and Burntrap stood before PB, Marceline, Bruce, Peter, Yurielle, Irene, Rick, Morty, Nick, Monroe, Mercuria, Victoria, MJ, F.F., The Joker, and Green Goblin.
Toffe's Agents attacks.
Bruce, Peter, Goblin, and The Joker look at and give nods to each other.
Bruce tosses a gravity bomb toward Joker, who catches and pockets it.
Peter climbs onto Bruce's back as Bruce activates his wings and thrusters, flying upward.
Goblin and The Joker jump, clap their feet twice and activate their gliders.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
"HEY!!!" yelled Al Cado. "ENYABA!!!"
Enya's fog tentacles capture Goblin's glider, but Goblin spins and uses a gravity blade to tear the fog tentacle in half.
Rick and Morty fly upward as well.
Burntrap charges.
Monroe goes on and tackles Burntrap and starts mauling him.
Monroe spits out some of Burntrap's flesh. "Gross!"
Mercuria duplicates Burntrap's head and fuses it, but this doesn't affect him as he kicks Mercuria down. She woges and mauls Burntrap.
Irene takes out Stone Free and attacks Enya, who puppeteers her to attack Marceline.
"Why can't I-?" asked Enya.
"Vampire, dude," smiled Marcy. Marceline then goes on to knock her out with her ax's handle and put a Stand-Destabilizer around her neck.
PB was about to shoot Enya in the back of the head. "Great job!" she smiled.
Suddenly, Marceline looks at PB. "Why'd you not help?"
"What?" asked PB.
"What the hell is wrong with you!?"
Irene grabs her shoulder, but Marceline tries to attack her. She takes out Stone Free.
"No! You shut up! What the hell is wrong with you!?" Marceline grabs her mouth. "I didn't say that!SUGAR CHEEKS!*GASP!!!*" she covered her mouth again.
"What did you just call me!?" asked PB.
"No! No, I didn't-!"
PB blasts her ray gun at Marceline.
Irene yells. "GUYS!!! STOP-!!! RAUGH!!!" She attacks with Stone Free.
"WHOA!!!"
It's set to Ultraviolet Mode.
"What the hell is wrong with you!?" she asked, flying about and dodging.
"SHUT UP!!!"
Twitter laughs at the distance as the two women fight.
Victoria, meanwhile, goes on to use her Stand to attack Burntrap, but suddenly, she is attacked by White-Face.
*CLANG!!!*
Victoria blocks the attack with her arm, which bleeds.
"Who the hell are you supposed-?"
White-Face slashes his sword at Victoria over and over, and somehow, he always misses.
*PEW!!!*
He is shot in the arm by a plankton bullet, which multiplies and bloats his arm.
*PEW!!! PEW PEW PEW!!! PEW!!!*
*POP!!! SPLAT!!!*
"HOLY!!! SHIT!!!" yelled Victoria.
Yurielle throws knives at Burntrap over and over again.
Suddenly, Al Cado tries to grab her from behind her head, but Al Cado swoops backward and sidekicks Al Cado's face, but she ends up dropping to the ground. Yurielle throws knives at Al Cado over and over again, but the knives bounce off.
Al Cado grabs Yurielle's head and begins squeezing. Crackling noises could be heard as she shrieks out of fear.
*THWIP!!!*
"MMPH!!!" Al Cado backs away as his face is webbed by Peter.
He tears the web out of his face. "Funny, Spider-Man. You're a genius fighter but you can never save everybody, can you?"
Peter's goggles contract.
Peter lands before Al Cado.
Peter jumps, grabs Al Cado, strangles him with his thighs, and beats his face over and over again.
Al Cado, however, laughs, grabs his face, and beats his face to the point where one of Peter's goggles breaks into pieces, showing his left eye.
Al Cado then beats him over and over as Peter screams in pain. "Don't feed the cats you don't trust, Spider-Man..."
*ZAP!!!*
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!" yelled Al Cado, as he is warped by a gravitational bomb.
Bruce then punches him in the face, knocking him out as a large *THUD!!!* could be heard.
"How'd you know...?" asked Peter. "That... his weakness was a gravity bomb. How?"
"Same reason why Stefan could be injured by a strong-enough Stand. Gravitational energy with infinite force and power could dissipate the durability shields Al Cado has."
Peter is about to get killed by Al Cado from behind, but The Goblin and Joker spray Sleeping Gas and Joker Venom respectively.
Al Cado begins laughing and laughing as he drops to the ground, knocked out. He's still laughing while asleep. He kept on laughing as his tears begin to bleed blood. He then passes out.
"Did you kill him!?" asked Peter.
"No," said Goblin. "That was Sleeping Gas and Joker Venom."
Peter sighs. "This doesn't change anything."
"Neither I, you," said The Joker.
"Same, amigo," sneered Goblin.
Bruce stays silent.
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Now... Cancel each other..." whispered Twitter.
Marceline is about to strike PB in the head while PB is about to shoot her in the face. Irene has her stringer wrapped around their neck.
*PEW!!!*
Rick and Morty kill Twitter with a single shot in the head. A soft thud could be heard as she flops to the ground.
"That was for manifesting the Rick and Morty cancer community, you stupid bitch," said Rick.
"Yeah! Ooh! Ooh geez!" Morty begins rubbing his nipples.
"Hohoho! Morty, you little fucking sociopath!" laughed Rick. "Seriously, though. Stop."
"What the hey?" asked Marceline.
"The fuck...?" asked Irene.
"They're usually like this," said PB. "It's fine..."
F.F. kept on shooting at White-Face to the point where F.F. transforms into a crocodile and bites off his arm.
White-Face backs away as Victoria tosses a Stand-Destabilizer into his neck. They then tackle him to the ground.
Meanwhile, Monroe and Mercuria tear up Afton and restrain him to the ground.
Suddenly, PB walks in and takes a USB, attaching it to Afton and absorbing Afton.
Meanwhile, Goblin and The Joker fly toward Toffee's eyes to try and blow up his brain. However, a massive hole begins sucking them in as their armors begin crushing them from the outside.
General Ahasan sneers but suddenly, he's struck by lightning. Nick flies down and electrocutes Ahasan over and over, destroying his armor.
Meanwhile, Goblin and The Joker throw bombs inside the hole. The hole shoots the bombs back out but the pair dodge it.
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" cackled the pair.
The Joker takes out one of the gravity bombs Bruce gave to him, pulls the pin, and drops it down the hole.
*PEW!!!*
The gravity warps as the hole is eaten from the inside out.
Nick, meanwhile, puts a Stand-Destabilizer around Ahasan's neck.
*BOOM!!!*
"RAUGH!!!" yelled Toffee, being attacked by the first group.
*PEW!!!*
Suddenly, he roars as everyone freezes in fear.
After a split second, everyone's Stands and weapons retract. Everyone returned to their original forms and dropped to the ground, defeated.
Toffee's hair is silver.
"Do you really think that you fools can destroy me...?I am the First Monster. I am the beginning of all order and chaos. I am the creature that crawled out of the first woman's box and fed her the forbidden fruit. I am the creature that wrote the first covenant. I was the snake. I was the cricket in the puppet's head. I am 'gravity' and 'falling'. I am 'the strings'. I am The First Monster. It is only darkness that lies ahead of your silly races. So, now... Cry. Laugh. Scream. Roar. In the end... Instincts... Egos... You can't do anything to call out for help. Your voices will sail to nowhere. As long as I am here..."
(15:08 begins)
A portal opens...
Two cool dudie Gigachads walk out of the portal.
Jk. It's just Miguel Ibarra and Miguel Josuke Higashikata. The pair does a fist bump as they smile eagerly.
Josuke has white hair. As Miguel walks out of the portal
"Josuke..." smiled Erina.
"JOSUKE!!!" smiled the Jazz Fusion, trying to stand up.
"Josuke..." sneered Toffee.
*PEW!!!*
He blasts at Erina's left plane wing, injuring her left arm. A hole is shot in the wing and a hole is bored into her arm as she begins to crash down. She retracts her Stand as she begins to fall.
"KILLER QUEEN ULTIMATE!!!" yelled Josuke.
Josuke zooms toward Erina.
*THWIP!!!*
Josuke is holding Erina while falling with her.
Toffee blasts at Josuke over and over, but he dodges all of his attacks.
He surrounds Erina with his energy to protect her from whiplash.
Josuke then goes on to zoom around Toffee and shoot tiny glowing white balls, blowing up Toffee's body over and over, blasting holes all over his body. Permanent holes...
He then slows down and saves her as he swoops to the ground next to the Jazz Fusion.
(theme ends)
Josuke turns to Gumball.
"What...?" asked Gumball.
"Gumball? More like... Got no balls!" smiled Josuke.
The Jazz Fusion snickers.
"What the hell, man!?" asked Gumball. "You have a dead-end job! And you're balding!"
"You're basic."
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!"
Even the others said, "OH!!!"
"More like basic badassery!"
"Or basic bitchiness."
"OOOOOOH!!!"
"Suck it!"
"There ain't nothing to suck, boi."
"OOOOOOOOOOH!!!"
Gumball smiles. "Good one."
"Thanks... HA!!! Take that, Wax Gumball!!!" yelled Josuke.
"What the fuck?" asked Gumball.
"Talk later," said Miguel. "Go kill Toffee and cut off his head."
"Whoa, whoa! I can't just kill a person and cut off his head!"
"I watched Hereditary. Dude, just do it," said Miguel.
So did I. I just watched it.
"Really? How was it?"
I'm traumatized.
"So... So am I. Poles... am... Am I right?"
No...
No...
"Sorry...F-... Fuck Paimon."
YES!!!
Yeah... It was symbolic but... Also fucked up.
"Looking good, Aswang Prince," commented Erina, who smiles.
"Thanks..." said Josuke.
"Weird... Did you lose weight?"
"Yeah... Heheh... You look great, too."
Erina smiles softly and turns softly red.
"You've been gone for six hours!" yelled Darwin.
"Yeah... I uh... was there for a bit too long," said Josuke. "Sorry... Did anyone die yet?"
"No," said Gabrielle and Narcos at the same time.
"Haha! We should stop doing that!" smiled Gabrielle.
"Yeah!" giggled Narcos.
"Get a room," sighed Shizuka.
"Hai," said Jotaro.
"Well..." asked Miguel. "If you won't kill Toffee... We're all fucked..."
"Wait... You're serious about that!?Ibarra, I can't kill a person!"
"Uh... Yeah, you can. Just remember what I taught you."
"That wasn't part of the deal. What Messiah would ever suggest taking a life!?"
"The same one who lost everything and went insane for 3,000 years! I've lost people... family... friends... I watched them lose limbs"
"That's not up to you!"
"It actually kinda is!"
"Still... I'm not killing anyone. That wasn't part of the deal..."
Toffee begins to grow in power.
"Miguel, I don't kill people."
"Neither do I."
"THEN WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT!?"
"BEING THE ONE ABOVE ALL!!! THAT'S WHAT!!!"
"Josuke..." Erina grabbed his shoulder.
A worried Josuke turns to Erina.
"What else can you do?" asked Erina. "You fix things... right? You always solve everyone's problems... right? So... what do we do?"
"We're listening, boss," smiled Gumball.
"Hide the others..." said Josuke. "The seven of us will handle this... Just us..."
"You really think we could work together properly again?" asked Spongebob.
"Yeah... We've done it a couple of times already... We frick up, sure..." said Gumball. "But I think we have a chance."
"Yeah," smiled Finn. "We could take 'em out if we could show 'em some moves."
"Hey yeah, brothers from other mothers!" yelled Jake. "Let's do it, billyboys!"
"WOOHOO!!!" yelled Spongebob and Patrick.
"Yeah... But... what do we do, exactly...?" asked Darwin.
"What if we make a giant dildo and stick it up to his ass!?" asked Patrick.
Everyone stays quiet from that.
"Okay... here's what we do..." said Josuke.
"I feel like you're gonna say something but I just gotta say, I think I can help," said Miguel.
"I thought you weren't complying."
"Never said that. If there's an alternative, I'll go with it. That doesn't mean I'm not unsure."
Later...
"Hello... Steven? Let us out," said Gabrielle, contacting Steven from outside using a Holo-Watch.
"I've told you a billion times already that we can't with that thing in that city, I can't help you."
Gabrielle smirks and shows Damsel-Fly and Joseph Joestar tied up with Stand-Destabilizers around their necks.
Joseph smiles at the camera. "'Ello Gov'na!"
"Hi!" smiled Damsel-Fly.
"Captured 'em! And guess what! They haven't killed anyone innocent!" smiled Miguel. "But these guys did..."
The Joker and Goblin sneer at the camera also tied up.
"And these guys, too," said Miguel, showing Toffee's Agents.
"Well...?" asked Gabrielle.
Steven sighs and facepalms. "You await trial later. And you won't get full pay for this from the President."
"We don't care!" yelled the others, being severely injured all over.
"And how would you escape anyway?" asked Steven.
Miguel chuckles. "I have a thing-a-ma-jig Deus ex Machina!Also Finn! I talked to the TVA... I fixed you up with a good deal!"
Meanwhile...
(theme begins)
"HEY!!!" yelled Spongebob and Patrick.
Spongebob and Patrick giggle like a couple of kids on crack and belly flop on the ground.
Toffee sighs and turns to them. "Do you really want to do this? I'll get stronger and stronger... and soon I'll devour WORLDS!!! You are as insignificant to me as Earth is to the vast Omniverse."
"You'll devour my butt, that's what!" yelled Patrick.
"You have a vast butt, Shrimpy Tar-Tar-Sauced Black Barney the Dinosaur!" yelled Spongebob.
"Your suit looks untidy," said Patrick.
Annoyed by the last one, Toffee chases after Spongebob and Patrick.
He spits out a Ki Ball toward Spongebob and Patrick.
"Once I mature, I will lay waste to all the colonizers..." yelled Toffee.
Toffee kneels to the ground.
"I know that you're here... Ocean Worms..." Toffee's snout is right next to a building and the pair is behind it. "I can taste you... Your fear... I am the beast that feeds on the prey... Not the other way around...Forgive me... But I can taste the salt in your skin... It's maddening, isn't it? The fear?"
"They're not afraid of you!" yelled Finn.
"The timelines you've destroyed..." Toffee sighed. "The people you've killed..."
"The people I've killed..." whispered Finn. "I'll make up for it... I promised that to myself..."
"How...?" sneered Toffee.
"By stopping people like you... and die... fighting..." Finn squints his eyes.
"Impressive." Toffee tries to grab Finn, but suddenly, Finn is behind Toffee.
Toffee tries to grab Finn again, but suddenly, there are a hundred Finns.
"What the hell!?" asked Toffee.
Toffee kills one Finn.
All the Finns stare at Toffee with all seriousness.
"I'm a Cosmic Being. You must've felt that. I know what you desire, Finn... To destroy... to listen to your... primal instinct..."
Finn gulps... but all the Finns close their eyes and shake their heads. "Instinct not only eases the chaos within but causes chaos to be felt by the people around you... Even the people you love..."
"Wise words of Ibarra... You have quite the willpower, Mertens..."
*PEW!!!*
Toffee begins to change reality, which glitches.
Jake punches Toffee with an enlarged fist, but his hand turns into bubbles.
"Foolish old dog..." said Toffee. "You can't teach an old dog new tricks."
"I'm not old. I'm in my 30s, asshole," said Jake, as he kicks him in the balls by turning his foot into a giant foot, but his foot turns into confetti.
A piece of spaghetti falls on Toffee's eyeball.
"FUCK!!!" yelled Toffee, as he winks his eye while the tomato spreads in his eye. He wipes his eye.
"WOOOOHOOOO!!!" Gumball and Darwin shoot at Toffee with coins and Stand Bullets respectively while Darwin flies while he is a giant pterodactyl around Toffee.
Finn dances around and sings, "Surprise, crocodile face!"
He goes on to kill the Finns.
(theme begins at 1:45)
Josuke appears in front of Toffee. "Get distracted, baby! NOW!!!"
The dome begins to shrink as the group is teleported out of the dome.
Toffee's eyes widen. "Heheheh..." he chuckled. "Clever..." Toffee shrank as the dome shrank around him. "I'm quite impressed, Higashikata... You've managed to suppress destiny and shape it into your own false sense of security. Do you know why, Josuke? Because you're a coward. All of you... cowards... fearing the new world order."
"There won't be a new world order," said Josuke. "Because all I see is another coward who thinks he did something to help people. All he did was serve himself. Like any other villain."
"Yeah... But I'm the one who destroyed what you are..."
Josuke frowns.
"Josuke..." said Miguel. "This is an alternative... right...? You don't have to act anymore."
"I can still hear your little Stand... screaming... crying... trying to exist again... But it can't... Because... You? You're like a broken watch... An object with no purpose... Where will you go now?"
"Shut up..." said Josuke.
"And here you are. Desperately trying to find a comeback... But you can't. Because what I'm saying is true."
Josuke is about to do something but scoffs and looks down. He chuckles. "You didn't destroy me. Because unlike you, I get to keep going and redeem myself. You're the one caged like the animal you are.So... I just wanna say...Surprise!"
Toffee is impressed as his smile disappears. He smiles again. "You're good..."
Gabrielle presses a button as he shrinks. He continues to shrink infinitely in the quantum realm.
"Good one," said Gumball, laughing.
Everyone cheers.
"You did good, Josuke," smiled Erina.
Josuke knelt down, trembling as his white hair and energy disappears. His mouth bleeds.
The Jazz Fusion hugs Josuke.
"That's sappy... and so is what I'm about to say... but..." Miguel grabs his shoulder. "You did good, kid."
"I'm proud of you," smiled Gabrielle.
Jotaro, Irene, and Shizuka smile.
Yurielle giggles.
Bruce and Peter sigh in relief.
"Well... We're broke again," said Rick, as Morty hits his elbow.
"Aw yeah!" yelled F.F.
The others await Josuke's next words.
"Shouldn't we call the hospital?" asked Peter.
"Nah," smiled Gabrielle.
"But... well... Shouldn't we?" asked Narcos.
"I dunno," said Mercuria. "How bad is it?"
"I feel... weak..." thought Josuke. "But... I feel more resilient... And I guess that's pretty cool..."
"We'll-..." said Josuke, as everyone listens. "I'll... bring everyone... for... drinks..."
Everyone cheers as they all walk away.
"LET'S DO KARAOKE!!!" yelled Spongebob.
"WHOO!!! LET'S KICK SOME ASS!!!" yelled Patrick.
"Well, Patrick... I really think we should bring Josuke to the hospital," said Peter.
"Aw!" yelled F.F. "The pressure's already getting to Peter."
"No, I'm serious..." said Peter. "Any second now, he could."
Josuke flops to the ground.
"It's alright," sighed Erina. "He's an Aswang. My ER scanner says that he just didn't sleep for 3 months."
"Oh, right... Mortals sleep," said Miguel. "Whoop dee doo."
Retired:ToffeeOld Dude
Arrested:Al Cado (Earth-Prince)General Ahasan (Earth-Prince)Twitter (Maharlica)White-Face (Earth-Grimm)Enya Enyaba (Earth-Grimm)Burntrap (Earth-Prince)
Killed:Alex (Earth-Prince)
Sued:Sarah Saiku (Earth-Prince)
In for Questioning:Sarah Saiku (Earth-Prince)Joseph Joestar (Earth-Star)Damsel-Fly (Earth-Prince)Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum (Earth-AT1278)Marceline Abadeer (Earth AT-1278)Simon Petrikov (Earth-AT-1278)
Escaped and Given a Head-Start:The Joker (Prime-Earth)Green Goblin (Prime-Earth-616)
Well... Josuke lost his Stand...
Yep. Now, what?
Let's wait... for the next arc... The Earth-777 War Arc...