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My brother is suicidal. 

That is what Ndulou concluded after seeing Ernesto's memories. In his previous lives, Ernesto either killed himself or threw himself into danger. Ndulou now knows what Ernesto's goal is: to have his family have a fulfilling life that includes Evans and Jose Oliva. 

But he fails in each return because his enemies are none other than the gods. Ndulou already knows what Ernesto wants, and it will never happen unless he plans to regress a million times. He came to this conclusion due to Fenrir's similar situation. Fenrir's determination to have a happy family life, despite the gods' constant ruining of their peace, cost him a thousand reincarnations. Ndulou doesn't want to suffer Ernesto that long, but his fifteen-year-old mind cannot think of any solution, especially since the main cause of Ernesto's suffering was him himself.

He is bothering me again.

He is bugging me to live again.