62. Revelation from the Past

|| Steven Montefalco ||

I took a sipped on my wine as I averted my eyes on her. Then I start to tell everything about our past.

"I meet you in a province where you're staying there on that day. You're wearing a uniform when I saw you walking while holding your slippers in a pathway. And there, there's something pushed me back to get out inside my car, because I've feel something pity for seeing you on that way. So, I can brought you in your house nang hindi ka na mahirapan.." I stopped for a moment. I hold my glass with a wine at pinag-laruan ko iyon while looking on it.

"And every things' started on that. We've been closed to each other and until we've been fall inlove, when you confessed on me that you love me and that's the way also I feel for you. Then after it, you become my girlfriend, and I'm become your boyfriend. As you said also that you wanted me to be part in your life. Then the days and months had passed by, we still kept our hearts in a circulation of love. And we promised to each other that we'll wait each other until the day that we're allowed to have a family. But one day, when I go there in your house, hindi kita natagpuan doon. I'm still hoping that maybe you just go somewhere with your family--as I find out na wala kayo doon nung araw na 'yon. And I didn't see your presence when those days are passing. Hindi ko iniisip na you just left me without any words or reasons, and I'm still hoping that I still can see you. But one day, when I tried to go back again in your house, as I walked on the backyard, suddenly my eyes caught that swing. I saw there a paper and I tried to open and read it.." I paused for a while, I tried to look on her and she's still listening without looking on me. Then I continued. "I never thought that it would happened--that you leave me like a damn. Matapos kong basahin ang sulat mo, that you said that we're not for each other. And you better want me to look for someone who's better for me..."

"P-pero, yung sinabi mo na fiance mo ako..paano nangyari 'yon?" this time I take a look on her, and I noticed a mixed emotions on her face.

"It was happened when our path crossed on each other again unexpectedly. When I was on a ride going back to my home, I saw a taxi bumped into a tree. And I did not hesitate to go over there, to bring you on a hospital as I saw you there and there's many blood shed coming from your head--as you're the one that I found there still breathing dahil patay na yung driver nung taxi. After bringing you in the hospital, I tried to contact someone from your family using your phone. And it was your sister--Dwayne Suzanne. I did not expect that you're that girl Marsha whom I love before. After I saw you on that car, and seeing your sister na ipinakilala mo noon sakin..." I grinned. "You know what? I'm so happy at that time, as I found you. I took that chance because I don't want you to be far again from me. After those days that you're getting in a recovery, nag-karoon ako ng pagkakataon na kausapin ka. But suddenly my whole world stopped, after I knew from the doctor that you have an dissociative amnesia.." Sinubukan kong lumapit sa kanya ng bahagya, nang mapansin kong may luha nang pumatak sa kanyang pisngi. Pinunasan ko iyon gamit ang aking hinlalaki.

"Marsha. I know it's hard to believe, but I know that it is the best way so you may know what's the truth. After, those months that I decided to take care you--and with your sister, because it's needed na alagaan ka together with your maintenance, all things was changed. Ikinuwento ko sayo lahat--from our past but I noticed on you that I know it's hard for you to remember. So I tried so many things just to make you believe and remember it.." I paused for a while when I decided to took the letter that she left on me before. "That's the letter that you've left on me. And besides of it, it also had a ring.." binuksan niya iyon ng dahan-dahan at sandali niyang pinag-mamasdan iyon. "That ring is our pledge to each other. That we'll love each other forever after I propose on you--and you said na payag kang maging fiancee mo ako. But then again, after some days that had passed, you just left me again without a reason. I tried to search on you again but I was failed..." sumimsim ako ng alak. I've tried to control my self about what I feel right now.

Yeah. There's still a trace of pain inside of me, pero hindi ko nalang pina-halata sa kanya 'yon. Dahil hanggang ngayon ay naka-tanim pa rin iyon sa mga alalang ko.

I tried to hold her hand and I noticed that she doesn't let out a words. I know she was still in dumbfounded and she's trying to remember those things in her mind.

But that's the thing I really wanted to say from her noon pa. And speaking on it, lahat ng mga bagay na nangyari simula ng makita ko siya ulit, it was all planned.

When I saw her alone in elevator, I took that chance para maka-usap siya. But in a starting line again. And when she go there in a fast food chain, I actually follow her. As I really wanted to take those chances na masilayan ko siya ulit at maka-usap.

But when I knew that she's now with Logan, hindi ko matanggap iyon. I tried to investigate about them--kung paano sila nagka-kilala and why does Marsha looks that they're damn closed to each other.

At nalaman ko na 'don nag-apply ng trabaho si Marsha. Until it goes by, naging malapit sila sa isa't-isa. At hindi na ako mag-tataka kung bakit ganun nalang rin ang pag-iingat ni Logan kay Marsha, because I knew also that they'd also a past before me.

It sucks. Everything I did para lang mapalapit rin kay Marsha. At nung gabing nakita ko soya sa tabi ng kalsada, hindi 'yon nagkataon na napa-daan ako doon. That's my way para maka-usap siya, even though I know what was happened on her at that time--pinalagpas ko lang 'yon dahil ayokong magpahalata sa kanya na sinusundan ko siya.

Then after it, I decided to have always a dinner on her dahil alam ko ring panahon na para mas lalo pa siyang mapa-lapit sa akin, and at the same time--I can take her slowly and to tell on her about our past.

"Marsha. I'm sorry if I'm persisting for telling this to you. But I know it's unbelievable for you. I still understand.." malumanay kong sabi. Hinawakan ko ang kanyang pisngi at pinunasan ko ulit ang kanyang mga luha, habang naka-yuko siya at naka-pukol ang tingin na niya ngayon sa ipinakita ko sa kanya at ang singsing na ngayon ay hawak ng kanang kamay niya. "But please, take your time to remember all those things that I've said to you. And I'll wait for it.."

Napansin kong sumilay ang bahagyang ngiti sa kanyang labi.

"S-salamat Steven. Pero asahan mo na hindi ibig sabihin, okay na ang lahat. Bigyan mo lang ako ng panahon para dito na makapag-isip.." sambit niya. Sabay sinubukan rin niyang punasan ang kanyang mga luha, habang naka-dapo pa rin ang palad ko sa kanyang pisngi. Then she made chuckled.

"P-pasensiya na ha, iyakin talaga ako.." naka-ngiti niyang sabi.

"I understand. Its okay.." bahagya ko siyang nginitian. This time, I feel overwhelmed because I already said to her all those things. I just needed a time to know if what's will be still her decision about it.

In a sudden, wala namang umimik sa'ming dalawa. Bahagya lang naka-yuko ang ulo niya habang pinag-mamasdan ko lang siya.

"You don't want to eat those?" napukaw ko ang atensyon niya ng mapa-gawi ang tingin niya sa'kin. Nginitian niya ako.

"A-ahh, hindi. Kakainin ko.." I noticed na halata sa kanya na pilit niyang iniisip 'yong mga sinabi ko sa kanya. Pero mukhang nahihirapan ata siyang alalalahanin ulit ang mga yaon.

Suddenly, I heard there's something ringing coming from a phone. Napansin kong binuksan niya ang bag niya at may kinuha siya mula doon.

"U-uh, Steve. Kailangan ko na palang umalis.." nagbago ang timpla ng kanyang mukha matapos niyang tapunan ng tingin yung cellphone niya sandali.

"Why? Is it because of him?"

I made a think for a moment. And I know na si Logan ang tumawag sa kanya. And I didn't doubt why Marsha are still happy for being with that man. Afterwards, she nodded on me. Saka siya tumayo.

"Marsha.." and before she leave, naghabol ako ng salita sa kanya. Napa-pitlig naman ang ulo niya sa akin na may pag-tataka.

"Take this.." iniabot ko sa kanya yung singsing at yung papel na sulat-kamay niya. Pagdaka'y kinuha niya iyon. "I'll wait for your to comeback..to start all over again with you, Marsha. Take your time to decide on it.." pagkasabi ko noon. Napatango nalang siya, at pagdaka'y humakbang na siya paalis.

While me, I was just looking on her now afar from me, hanggang sa mawala na siya sa'king paningin.

I took a sip on my wine sabay nilunok ko 'yon.

I should not stop doing it. I want Marsha to come back on me. Because I still damn love her. I'll do everything so she'll choose me before Logan take away Marsha from me--and to get rid me from Marsha's eyes.

I made a serious look. I should immediately have a plan on how Marsha will be gone on that Logan's side. Dahil alam ko na kumikilos na rin si Logan--para burahin ang alaala namin ni Marsha. And I know that he'll also make a way para baguhin ang buhay ni Marsha--for being with him.

-----

|| Marsha Sandoval ||

Habang nasa loob ako ng taxi, hindi ko makontrol ang sarili ko na hindi umiyak. Hindi pa rin kasi maalis sa isipan ko yung mga nalaman ko kay Steven. At yung ipinakita niyang letter na iniwan ko noon daw sa kanya. At yung singsing na ibinigay niya sa akin.

Alam kong parang timang lang, saka napansin kong panay sulyap sa akin nung driver at nag-tataka ata kung bakit ako umiiyak.

Letse kasi eh. Bakit sila pang dalawa pa yung naging nakaraan ko. Nahihirapan tuloy ako. At mukhang binibigyan pa ako ng problema. Ugh!

Paano na tuloy ako nito? Paano naman si Logan kung sakaling baliwalain ko na siya? Paano naman din si Steven kapag pumayag ako na magkabalikan ulit kami? Ugh! Ang gulo na talaga!

Inabot ko na ang bayad ko sa driver ng taxi ng mapansin kong tumigil na ito sa harap ng bahay. Pinunasan ko muna ang mga luha ko bago ako lumabas ng taxi.

Hindi pa ako nakaka-pasok sa loob ng bahay, napa-hinto ako sandal ng mapa-angat ang tingin ko sa kanya.

"L-logan?" Naka-tingin lang siya sa akin ng blanko ang mukha habang nasa harap ko siya ngayon. At naka-halukipkip lang siya.

Hindi ko naman napigilan ang sarili ko kaya bigla nalang akong napa-yakap sa kanya. At sa pagkakataon na 'yon, bigla namang bumuhos ang luha ko.

"Why are you crying? Is there something happened wrong that I did know?" bakas sa boses niya ang pag-alala sa akin.

Naramdaman ko naman niyakap rin niya ako. Pagdaka'y hinawakan niya ako sa aking mukha at hinarap niya iyon sa kanya.

"Tell me. Why are you crying love?" mapanglaw na mukha niya ang tumambad sa akin. Pinunasan naman niya ang luha ko gamit ang kanyang hinlalaki.

Napa-iling ako at napa-tawa nalang ng marahan. "W-wala..na-miss lang kita.." pag-sisinungaling ko. Pero sa totoo lang, hindi naman 'yon yung dahilan eh. Nasasanay na tuloy akong mag-sinungaling sa kanya. Ugh! Gumuhit nalang ang pilit kong ngiti sa'king labi.

"Ssshh..I miss you too love." pagdaka'y mabilis niya akong binigyan ng matamis na halik.

"P-pwede bang 'wag ka munang umalis?" sambit ko nang mag-tinginan na kami ngayon sa isa't-isa.

"Okay. I'll be here at your side until dawn. So you'll not missed me again.." pagkasabi niya niyon, sinabi kong pumasok na kami sa loob. At mukhang doon na muna talaga siya mag-papahinga ng tabihan niya ako sa higaan, pagkatapos niya akong buhatin papunta doon sa loob ng kwarto ko.