Can We Get a Break?

"Did we ever find out what Peta-Lorrum meant about Malfoy's elf and Potter?" Severus asked as he picked up his cards.

"Peta-Lorrum said the elf was trying to stop Potter's mail to keep the boy out of Hogwarts," Minerva replied. "He also attacked Potter with that Bludger back in November."

"We're sure it wasn't Lovegood? She was getting violent towards the end."

"The book possessed her," Minerva snapped. "She had no control over her own actions."

"The way she acts, how can you tell?" Severus asked.

"Severus!" Pomona gasped. "That's a horrible thing to say! That girl's already been through enough this year!"

"There's no need to get angry, Pomona," Minerva said. "He's just jealous because Peta-Lorrum's found a new best friend."

Severus glowered at her as she ordered some chips into the pot.

Minerva smirked when she thought she saw smoke coming out of Severus's ears.

"Sometimes, I swear you two are still students here," Pomona said, taking a drink.

"At least they're not still on about that duel," Filius said.

"That's right," Minerva said, oozing condescension. "How many wins did Gryffindor get on the first day? Raise to 20."

"The first didn't count," Severus said as Filius added more chips to the pot. "It didn't take Peta-Lorrum to beat Lockhart."

"Don't pretend you didn't enjoy watching him turned into a rat," Pomona said, adding some of her own chips. "It was all you talked about at dinner."

"A naked mole rat," Filius added.

"Fold," Severus said. "Peta-Lorrum aside, Perks got lucky in her duel against Malfoy."

"I don't think she did," Minerva replied, placing her cards on the table. "Full house."

"Two pair," Pomona said.

"Four of a kind," Filius said, taking the pot. "Thanks for giving me that one."

"If I won them all, you might think I was cheating," Pomona said. "Ironic, since I'm the only one at this table who doesn't."

"You can't prove anything," Severus said.

"You drugged our drinks three years ago," Pomona said. "Filius stacks the deck every so often, and Minerva transfigures her cards."

Her companions glared at her.

"Does it ever get lonely up on that pedestal, Pomona?" Minerva asked.

"It's not a pedestal, Minerva, it's a platform onto which I can raise my students," Pomona replied. "Five."

"Isn't it hard to walk through doors with that halo over your head?" Severus asked. "Raise to ten."

"Whatever do you mean?" Pomona asked, looking as if she were a young girl answering the question "Did you take the last biscuit?".

"I'm sure I've seen Peta-Lorrum make that same face," Minerva said. "Back to the duel, apart from that snake, Malfoy didn't land a single spell. Raise to 20."

"Only because Bathsheda, in her infinite wisdom, imprinted a Shield Rune on Perks," Severus said.

"Her reflexes were impressive for someone so young," Filius said.

"And if Bathsheda hadn't, Potter would likely be dead right now," Minerva said. "That rune saved their lives when we fought the Basilisk."

"Once again, I'm impressed that those children fared as well as they did," Filius said, taking a drink. "Having fought it myself, it proves a challenge. Call."

"Agreed," Minerva said. "I've often wondered if I will die in the Hospital Wing, but that wasn't quite what I was expecting."

"I don't think any of us expected this," Pomona said. "Call."

"This is what happens when we allow an orphan into the school that literally showed up on our doorstep. Or do you all still think it's just a coincidence that everything the Basilisk did revolve around Peta-Lorrum?"

"Do you ever tire of thinking the worst of everyone?" Pomona asked, taking another drink.

"Do you ever time of thinking there's no evil in the world?" Severus shot back.

"Oh, I know there's evil," Pomona replied. "I just don't think it comes in the form of that little girl."

"So there's one for believing Peta-Lorrum's cute and innocent routine," Severus said. "Anyone else?"

"Oh, I didn't say I believed it for a second," Pomona said. "She's got an attitude problem, little respect for authority for the sake of respecting authority, takes little seriously, if anything, and angers far too quickly. However, I believe that she will always place the safety of her friends before herself, and she does try to be a good person. She's just not that good at it."

"Severus, you didn't see her face when she charged off to the Chamber of Secrets," Minerva said. "I've never seen someone quite so determined to help her friends."

"You mean the friends she left behind to die?" Severus asked. "Raise to 50."

"I mean Lovegood, the girl Peta-Lorrum protects as if she's her own blood," Minerva shot back. "Raise to 100."

"Fold," Filius said.

"If she were obvious, we wouldn't trust her."

"It is possible for people to perform kindness out of the goodness of their hearts."

"People maybe, but not Gryffindors."

"Grow up!"

"Do you think they remember that we're still playing?" Filius asked Pomona.

Pomona looked from Minerva, whose lips were pressed together so tightly they were turning white, to Severus, whose sneer almost made Pomona want to punch him.

"I doubt it," Pomona said. "Call!"

"You've seen one Gryffindor, you've seen them all," Severus said. "They're all ambitionless, pigheaded, troublemakers. Raise to 200."

"I don't see anything wrong with a lack of ambition," Minerva snapped. "As for pigheaded and troublemaker, Perks, Granger, and Longbottom each disprove that. Or would you prefer that every student turns out like Lucius Malfoy? Call!"

"All in!"

Minerva and Severus turned to Pomona as her entire stack of chips moved to the pot.

"Healthy competition is one thing, but this is nothing short of disgraceful!" she snapped. "I hope my students turn out like neither of you two. The world isn't a dark, horrible place where people are always trying to trick one another, and yelling at one another will never prove that to anyone. I respect you two for your knowledge in your respective fields and the trust Albus has in each of you, but right now, I'm ashamed to call either of you my associate, much less my friend."

Her anger deflated by Pomona's outburst, Minerva looked down at her cards, then back at Severus.

"I'm sorry," Minerva said.

"Sorry," Severus said, although much less willing to admit it.

"I believe you just went all in?" Minerva asked Pomona.

"I did," Pomona replied.

"Fold," Severus said, revealing his two pairs.

"Fold," Minerva agreed, doubting whatever she had could beat Pomona. Pomona wasn't one to throw away victory unless she knew she had something.

"Before we finish, I want to know that my victory will do nothing to diminish my words," Pomona said.

"We must set a good example for the students," Minerva said. "No matter our personal quarrels."

"I suppose we must," Severus said.

"Thank you," Pomona said, revealing her hand.

Filius, Minerva, and Severus looked down at her cards, then back at her. In their combined experience, none of them had ever seen a more devious grin than that which covered their fellow professor's face.

"You had nothing?!" Filius exclaimed.

"Not a thing, I'm afraid," Pomona confirmed. "Before you two started squabbling, I'd hoped to win the game with it."

"And you probably could've," Filius muttered.