Irvin

I knew that King Teigh had had no choice but to act once the Twelve got involved. The Council of Equals as it was sometimes referred to had worked better than people had expected. Still, deep in the depths of my heart, I felt the stirrings of betrayal and abandonment. Logically, I knew that things were getting worse, that my anger was reaching the breaking point. I had come close to slaughtering those children, and that scared me even now.

It was time to admit that something was broken in me. A sense of balance and justice that had persevered even under the cruel ministrations when treated like chattel by Thom, Lord Kel's son was missing. For all the indignities that I had suffered while collared, I had been able to maintain my sense of self. Queen Mab had taken that away from me when she gelded me.

I was trying not to hold a grudge. Trying to look at this banishment as an opportunity. A chance to start over, in an environment that didn't constantly remind me that Queen Mab had been allowed her insanity because no one would say no. Queen Mab's Court was gone, but people who had ignored her actions remained.

I wouldn't try to rationalize my behavior; I wasn't so far gone that I would try to excuse or blame others for what I had done. I knew a large part of my anger was directed at the Seelie because of their hypocrisy. They styled themselves the Summer Court, servants of justice and light, but that had been only lip service. They espoused virtue and goodness while conducting atrocities in the shadows.

King Teigh had decided I would join the staff of a new Embassy. He was tireless in his efforts and had just established relations with the Hindu Pantheon. I had to admit the speed and efficiency that he was expanding Talahm interests and creating alliances, reaching out to other Pantheons that had been oppressed or marginalized by the Olympians and Asgardians, was impressive.

The Unseelie and Seelie Monarchs were still focused on factional issues to spend much time on inter-planetary alliances. Their focus inward had allowed King Teigh to become the driving force to expand Sidhe's influence and prestige.

His ability to negotiate alliances was impressive, but what was even more impressive was the concessions he was able to attain from those Gods that had opposed the Sidhe in the past.

The Tuatha de Danaan were bound in sleep, their powers limited. That King Teigh could broker deals with beings so much more powerful than he was a testament to his will. His identity and purpose were unassailable, even in the face of those elemental forces that helped guide the creation of the Universe.

And he was tested. Assailed by Gods both minor and major. But if it was possible to corrupt or influence him, Olympus and Asgard would have already done so.

His ability to resist the other-worldly domains of beings that were tasked with order and chaos was a badge of honor, a touchstone the Sidhe could point to and aspire to attain. It meant that the people of Talahm entered the wider Universe as rightful claimants to the resources that could be claimed, not as supplicants with hat in hand begging for whatever leavings the other Gods might offer.

"Irvin?" the Aide-de-camp for Ambassador Clive said claiming my attention, "Lord Clive will see you now."

Lord Clive was a new breed of Sidhe Ranked. King Teigh had recruited only those Sidhe who showed enough flexibility in thinking to help further his agenda. Those that had become hidebound and lost to dogma, those resting on their laurels were excluded from all levels of Government. How he was able to weed out and select only those with drive, ambition, and a desire to better the plight of Sidhe was a mystery.

I thought it likely he was generating System quests, to find the people best qualified to fill positions as they become available. Ambassador Clive was a Ranked: Lord. Rank he had gained through his efforts without resorting to cronyism or favors. He had farmed a level four dungeon, over and over again, leveling and ranking up from a mid-level Knight to a level eight Lord.

The new dungeons the System had opened when King Teigh claimed Aingeal Geamhraidh had introduced a new mechanic to Ranking. A System quest became available that would provide the same opportunity for advancement. The mechanics worked the same as challenging a higher Ranked Sidhe. A boss fight would be generated, one that required the person hoping to Rank up to prove their ability.

The boss fight was difficult, even harder than dueling for Rank, but for those that were determined, and refused to wait on the whims of others, it offered a solution. It also began to break the logjam of stagnation that had set in for the Sidhe. Fresh blood, people with unique perspectives were gaining Ranks. People willing to share and test their ideas. And people willing to innovate the way they ruled when awarded a fief.

I followed the young man, the secretary that had been tasked with guarding the Ambassador from random interruptions. The room he showed me too was more conference room than an office. At the moment it seemed to be doubling as both. Reams of reports, papers, and files littered the impressive conference table, the entire surface covered in work product. The clutter was impressive and frightening. If I had to wade through that exhaustive pile of information, it would take weeks.

And we were leaving today.

Seated at the head of the conference table was Lord Clive. Unlike most Ranked, he wasn't trying to prove how powerful he was, the aura of power that the Ranked trained was tightly controlled. There was none of the pressure that I would have expected.

That he was a Volar-fey may have been the reason. As a people, they had only resurfaced recently, at about the same time King Teigh claimed his throne, but it hadn't taken long before they had created enclaves in every corner of Talahm.

Most people thought them flighty, making assumptions about their personalities based on their size. They were looked upon fondly, but more as oddities, harmless decorations, than people. Many considered them nothing more than talented wisps. Lord Clive would dispel those assumptions.

"His Majesty has left the decision of where to best use your talents with me," Lord Clive informed me ignoring niceties like introductions. "I know you trained as a Peace-maker and because of that training, I have decided to use you as a diplomatic attaché. You will attend meetings, network with the people on Derva, and listen to their complaints.

"The fact that you are being added to my staff this late is cause for concern. You are not up to speed on the people, System idiosyncrasies for the planet, their Pantheon, or issues of Caste that are endemic to those who practice Hinduism," he explained.

"Frankly, at this point, you are more a liability than an asset to our mission, one that I would refuse to entertain if not for the intervention of the Twelve. You have none of the knowledge we need you to have. So, for the first few weeks, you will be isolated, locked in study. I will have an office assigned to you, near my own, and I expect you to use it. To spend the time, you wasted on vengeance and focus, on study. Use that energy on something constructive.

"I warn you now," he continued not caring in the slightest how I was reacting to his words, "this assignment is not a reward. The work I have assigned you, the study I require is only a preview for what you can expect. If you are unable or unwilling to fulfill the duties that a diplomatic attaché is required to perform, His Majesty has given me leave to dismiss you.

"Without cause.

"Without appeal.

"What you do in the event I have to go to that extreme will then be between you and His Majesty," he warned.

"That said, don't think I want you to fail, or that I plan on assigning you tasks, so onerous, that you have no recourse but to fail. It is in my best interest to see you succeed. His Majesty expects much from you, and if I can help you prove to him you are worth redeeming, that reflects well on both of us.

"Let me be clear, I didn't want to accept you. Your actions, your obsession with vengeance doesn't fit well with an Ambassador's staff. We are meant to diffuse issues, not create them. But we will start with a fresh slate. Your past actions will be forgotten.

"Perhaps it would be better if you looked upon this as an opportunity rather than punishment. As long as you are willing to set aside your resentment and anger, you can restore your reputation. Undo some harm your actions have had on House Teigh.

"The Twelve have given you a path forward, a chance for redemption," he promised.

"Take this chance. Walk among the Hindu people and restore your balance. The Goddess Belisama has not turned her back on you, even after all the carnage and death you have caused, she will offer you solace and purpose.

"There was a reason you aspired to become a Peace-maker. King Teigh is giving you a chance to remember what those reasons were. He thinks you can be reformed, that you will rise to the occasion. I'm not sure you can, that you can part the fog of despair that you have embraced for so long.

"But we will see, beginning with how you apply yourself to duty over the next few weeks. Study and sift through the material I will assign you. Discover for yourself the issues of poverty and Caste these people live with. Hopefully, it will broaden your perspective."

What he said hurt, that my honor had become so besmirched that he thought I wouldn't bother to even attempt to fulfill my duties said much about the rumors and stories that my actions had created.

I stifled my initial response, my desire to defend myself against his accusation. I may have been so lost to vengeance that I almost slaughtered children, but I hadn't. My honor teetered on the precipice, but I hadn't careened over the cliff or King Teigh would have had no other recourse but summary execution.

I admitted, reluctantly, that I had turned my back on Belisama, and the tenets she expounded. I repudiated her gifts as one of her Peace-Makers, but that was a personal choice, not because I now disagreed with her mandate.

Although I was not so lost to anger that I could not step back from the brink of vengeance, there were some boundaries I would not, could not cross. The core of my personality was still intact, no matter how damaged Queen Mab had left it.

And hopefully, King Teigh was correct and the healing methods of the Swami, the practice of yoga, and meditation would help me to heal what damage remained.