I try not to let that Louisa woman to bothering me much. Wait a minute. Why in the first place should I feel bothered? Why I am already feel dislike towards her?
I don't know her that well to form that kind of strong emotion. In fact, apart from nodded and smile, she doesn't even say anything yet. And this is our first encounter. What is wrong with me?
Many romance novel I read before will be screamed this is "jealousy". Whom jealous to whom? Is it me? Am I in jealousy toward this Louisa woman? Huh, really? But I don't think so.
I'm familiar with jealousy feeling. The feeling where you want to scratch your opponent's eyes for even dare to look at your man. Or beat her into a pulp. The answer is none of above. I just met this guy only yesterday and giving consent albeit reluctantly to get married after less than half an hour since our eyes met. So it illogical for me to have a strong feeling for my temporary husband. Even to conjure the feeling of jealousy or possessive of him.
Then again, what is wrong with me? Nope, that a wrong word. What is wrong with Alex? This one sound more logical. Does these two have an affair? And Alex cut their relationship because of our marriage? If that is the case, I was an innocent party, this Louisa should place the resentment toward the guilty party, Alex, and not me!
Resentment? whoa, a very strong word indeed. She didn't even give me a darting glare or whatsoever. She just gave me an aura of uneasy feelings. And it wasn't really an action that I can pinpoint about. Why I was such in this mess? I am supposed to be at the airport with Siti on the way to our anticipating trip to Korea! And not sitting on this expensive car feeling out of place!
Herghhh!!
I won't admit I just shriek. No way! It just a sneeze sound. Sneeze? No, it was a cough.YES, I was coughing when caught in a surprise. I didn't shriek in an ungirlish way just now. I was only surprised when I feel a warm big hand suddenly grab my left knees and produced a cough sound when Alex's face was an inch closer from my face. I didn't even notice when he moved!
My reaction? Other than umm, giving a "cough" sound earlier, like a typical normal girl caught in surprise, I just reflexively jump and hit my head on the car top roof. I totally forgot I was sitting on the car! Other than the pain from bumping earlier, I want to hide when three pairs of eyes watching my embarrassing moment.
Alex helping me sit on the seat and start examining my head. And I just remain stiff all the time and still closing my eyes. Thinking very hard how to escape this awkward situation.
"Are you okay?"
I just nodded.
"What are you thinking about before?"
"Huh?"
"Since we are in the car, you have been mumbling something and your expression keep changing. Is something wrong?"
"Eh? Am I being too noisy and disturb you guys meeting?"
"Not that loud..."
THAT still mean it still LOUD!
I really need to kick this bad habit of mind. Whenever I was in deep in thinking, I usually lost in mind not noticing I was staring for a long time on the same place and making it worse, I also don't remember giving away an incoherent mumbling sound. To others, it might grate other people nerves of these bad habits of mine.
Facing Alex, I give my sincere apologies.
"I am sorry. Truly I do."
Facing his two companions, I again apologize and smile awkwardly.
"I am sorry. Please do continue your meeting and do not mind me."
And facing Alex, I nodded again.
"It's okay, Alex. I'm fine."
Alex looking straight into my eyes. I don't have any idea what he sees in my eyes that making he nodded himself. He just pats my knees and shows me his back again talking with his two companions continues his interrupted meeting.
In my mind, I screamed, "I'm fine Alex! Please removed your hand from my knees! It truly disturbs me more than the pain in my head!"