Review Detail of saipyda2000 in HARDENING KEKKAI GENKAI

Hello readers, I am new writer it's my first work after reading countless Naruto fanfic I wish to write on my own. Here his KEKKAI GENKAI is based on MHA kirishima hardening quirk . Please advise me if there is anything wrong in my writing as English is my 3rd language and am new to writing.