Jordon_B

Wow, you're full of shite. This story is completely awful. Only the first chapter was in any way decent.

I think you missed a step. It's not really clear what's happening. But wow, I think this chapter just ruined all the potential this story had.

Wow. How pathetic.

Yeah. Author thinks he's writing a Naruto fanfiction.

Writing quality and grammar are decent. But the way you list things isn't very good, you can never tell if it's a new item or a continuation of the previous item, since it's all listed the same. And the way you repeatedly list out the "status" so many times, and so close together, is very irritating. Plus a couple other things readers have already mentioned. Still pretty readable so far, though.

Did the daimyo hire ninja, or did he hire bandits? I sure as hell wouldn't trust those murder happy thugs with protecting me.

Weird that he spent so much time mastering the explosive tag and beginner seals, but hasn't bothered to learn sealing scrolls. He still carries everything in a backpack.

Just wanted to point out that if you stab someone in the chest, and then cut up, you don't disembowel them.. up is the throat and head. Down is the stomach and bowels.

I hope he's smart enough to keep the sealess fire jutsu secret where root can see him. But I doubt it.

Seems like a waste to complete the fire release expert tag before he practices the fire elemental transformation training. Adding 100% mastery onto, say, 20% is a whole lot less than adding it to 75-100%.