…Didn’t this guy want a harem? Did he forget about Uta? Also, Kuina was never sick. She fell down some stairs when putting away her father’s sword and died. The sick girl he’s thinking of might be Kaya. But she was being poisoned by Kuro and not really sick.

Aright. Let me be blunt. It’s an ok fanfiction. Nothing outstanding. The system? Basic. Mihawk Template, not taken seriously as the author doesn’t understand Mohawk’s strength entirely. (To be fair, nobody does, but he is seen as weak in this Fanfiction) I can look past a lot of things, don’t get me wrong. But what let’s me realy know that the author doesn’t know anything about Naruto is when the Chunin exams come up and the author goes. (MC is in a team of five, the Chunin Exam time was pushed forward, the first exam is an actual written test and not an “Information Gathering” exam as it’s portrayed in the original work) After that I couldn’t bring myself to read anymore. So yeah. 3/5 It’s okay. But I won’t recommend it.

Wasn’t the “real” Squard killed when Rob found Toki? You know, turned into glass by his lightning that created the ring of hell island?

Paul right now: “He really is my son.”

And he never will be, the Black Bulls base is being controlled with magic. :)

At this point, someone who took the art of being a Ninja seriosuly would have retreated and laid in wait. Humans are animals of endurance, whittle away the enemy forces a little at a time. Never let them sleep or rest. Drive them mad and kill them at their weakest. Just a little bit of work at a time is more than enough to kill any population.

… I too once held the ideal to add to the RWBY Fanfiction here on WebNovel. I failed. Good luck my friend.

Me right now:

Forgot to post this on the Patreon. Should probably do that.

I Am Become Death Or I Am The End

With her Cage Devil Fruit she could be the Jailer of the crew, leaving her in charge of the Brig. Eventually her Devil Fruit could have properties similar to that of Sea Stone and weaken all Devil Fruit users when it’s on them, but similarly it could possibly weaken Haki or Magic. Maybe it could even leave a small prison inside of her the same as Bege and his Castle Fruit.

Man. China is seriously laying it on thick with the so called “Rightousness” of China and the “Evilness” of Japan.

You can make Sand Soldiers… Kinda like how Esdeath makes Ice Soldiers. Or Biscuit and how he uses his Devil Fruit. She is a Princess, what kind of Princess doesn’t have an army at her beck and call?

…Did he forge the conversation with Rifan? Rifan told him and the Five Elders that it doesn not matter to him whether or not he becomes a Warlord. If he does, good. If not, who cares.

With the Heal Skill to transform people, you might not need this. But this can be considered the ULTIMATE version of that skill. To distort and manipulate another person’s Soul as opposed to their body alone. Basically you can just have him study on how Souls work and then make him have the idea to figure out how to manipulate and control them, he fails to control but figures out how to mold the soul and therefore the body of the person.

Instead of making a medicine that directly increases Magic power, why not make one that accelerates the growth of magic power? In the time it takes for an ordinary person to gain 100 stat points in MP it would increase the MC’s by 1,000 or more. A 10x multiplier.

Can you perhaps reupload the old version incase we want to reread it? Just upload it under another name so we can get it through your profile.

With having died… you’d think there would be a little.

You better choose this option. Otherwise it gonna be a bit generic and uninspired. You gotta have plots that separate yourself from the rest. Maybe then you will stand out. That is how you make it big. -loads of chapters -a unique story -lots of things people recognize -consistency That’s how you make it here in Fanfiction. I did 2/4 and did decent but I could’ve done better.

Hey. That’s me! :D