Chapter One

Long Bennington, Lincolnshire

1848

The service was brief, much to her relief. She was not the kind of person to emotionally weep when inside she did not feel any remorse at all. She was not going to be labeled as hypocrite.

Julianne Cosgrove, the only daughter of the late Earl Ledbury, Lord Paul Cosgrove managed a weak smile when she spied Mr and Mrs Luton approaching her, their expressions solemn.

"My dear Miss Cosgrove," Mrs Helen Luton started, squeezing her hands firmly. "We are terribly sorry for your loss child. Is there something we can do?" Julianne ruefully shook her gold curls. Her locks dancing in the sunlight that cold autumn morning.

"I thank you both for coming, Mr and Mrs Luton" Julianne smiled at the elderly gentleman beside his wife. Mr Joseph Luton smiled encouragingly as he spoke "Please come to us Miss if you ever need help" His eyes kind. "You know our door is always open for you"

Mrs Luton squeezed her slender hands briefly before departing, her husband at her side. Julianne watched the other attendees also took their leave, placing roses on her late father's coffin along the way. Some of them conversed briefly to her, offering their heartfelt condolences. Julianne politely acknowledged to each and every one of them, debating inside if they attended for their obliged sense of duty, paying their last respect to their landlord or just merely out of curiosity.

"Shall we bury the stiffer now, Miss?" A gruff voice interrupted her train of thought. Julianne started, not because of the hoarse voice of the undertaker, but to the term he referred her late father. Abruptly, she swung her face to the burly man. The man grinned at her ludicrously, displaying his yellow and blackened teeth. "Please have some respect for the Earl. After all, I had paid you handsomely for a proper burial. I, in return expects you and your men to carry your duty as honorable as well" Julianne stated, her tone firm. Estrange or not, her father was, he was after all her sire. The same person who brought her to this world.

The man sobered, wiping the grin completely from his face. "Aye Miss. S'sorry." He tipped his sweat-drenched cap in apology before bellowing to his helpers to start digging.

Julianne congratulated herself to stand up for her father, even though he will do nothing of the same sort for her if he was still alive. Lord Paul Cosgrove, Earl of Ledbury was indeed an indifferent father for as long she could remember. Since her mother died 2 years ago, the Earl moved his dwelling completely to London. His demeanor was always aloof and cold towards her. The earl who prefers his life in the city will occasionally visited his daughter who oversee the estate matters, demanding an explicit and untarnished records of the estate well being. She was two and twenty, what a young lady of her stature who never sets foot out of Long Bennington and oblivious of how the world works know about to manage estates? The heavens probably heard her prayer for help and sent Johnathan. Johnathan Hastings was her childhood friend only 2 years her senior. He was the one who taught her how to handle accounts and ledger while keeping a complete file for her future reference. She felt almost envious for Johnathan who had a loving family supporting him, even if his father only worked as a tea farmer. His mother was the kindest woman Julianne ever knew, tending to her children needs every day. Julianne found herself longing for a mother similar to Bertha Hastings. Julianne laughed meekly at her unlikely wish. She was a gentle-bred lady, born with a peer lineage, and here she was, wishing to be a tea farmer's daughter.

"And I thought they never leave" Someone murmured under the shadows of an oak tree interrupting her musings. Johnathan Hastings pushed himself from his comfortable lounging at the oak tree to join Julianne. Julianne presented her friend with a dimple smile overly relief to see him. "I thought you said you aren't attending the service?" Julianne eyed him carefully. He was surprisingly a handsome young chap despite his astuteness. "I am not, heaven help me" Johnathan grinned half heartedly raking his fingers through his chestnut hair.

"Then what are you doing here?" Julianne asked. Johnathan didn't answer immediately, merely shifting his footing, his eyes glued to his boots. "I thought you would like an escort home" He shrugged his shoulders. Julianne raised a mocking gold brow. "You were following me, aren't you?" It was a statement not a question. "Not follow, only to make sure you are ok," Johnathan corrected innocently. Julianne huffed half heartedly as she started to stroll towards her waiting gig. "Oh Johnathan, please stop worrying for me. I am a grown woman now," Julianne groaned without glancing back. But she knew Johnathan was trailing her, judging by the sound of crunch on the pathway behind her. "Papa and Mama had been beside themselves since Ledbury passed away," at Johnathan admission, Julianne whirled around. Encouragingly, she smiled up to her friend. Johnathan look like a wounded puppy, with his brown eyes gazing to her. "Tell Mama Bertha and Papa Jonas not to worry so much. I am fine" Julianne reassured Johnathan squeezing his arms lightly. She had been addressing them the terms as if they were her own parents. For how long? Julianne hardly remembered. All she can recollect was that she had been welcomed to the Hastings bosoms since forever. She never forgot the day she cried in Bertha Hastings' lap when Ledbury accused her of being incompetent. He was utterly blaming her to be born as a female instead of an heir he hoped to carry on the title. Julianne back lashed her father for being cruel and inhuman and wished him to damnation. Bertha, bless her huge heart, calmly hushed her and advised that was not the proper way to wish a parent no matter how cold and calculating they are. "Whenever Lord Ledbury throws a fit on you, you are always welcome here, child" Jonas Hastings muttered kindly while Bertha vigorously nodded her head.

Johnathan stood behind her, supported her by placing his palm gently on her shoulder. The rest of the Hastings murmured in agreement, Dick, Anne, Harold and the twins, Jerome and Augusta. She was merely fifteen at that time but it seems like yesterday.

"Jules," Johnathan called quietly behind her. "I am truly sorry for distressing you", he scratched the back of his head absentmindedly, trying to sum up the words. "But the whole family is worried over you" Johnathan grabbed Julianne's shoulders to twirl her around to face him. "I worry for you" His voice dropped into a whisper. "Have you given a thought about it?"

Julianne's eyes faltered a bit under his questioning gaze. Ah yes, 'it'. Julianne remembered Johnathan inquired about it fortnight ago. She did not really given it a serious pondering though. Julianne was ashamed to admit. She nearly forgot having the conversation until Johnathan brought it up again. Unable to conjure up a good excuse, Julianne merely cleared her throat and turned away. "Is it a wonderful afternoon, Johnathan?" She said instead, closing her eyes, lifting her face to the autumn sun. It felt good, being outdoors, feeling the warm breeze on her cheeks, kissing her hair.

"You have not thought about it" Johnathan stated quietly behind her.

"Oh Johnathan, we had this conversation, have we?" Julianne said, opening one eye to him. Johnathan stared downcast at his boots. His expression unreadable.

"I do not want people to start branding you as an old maid, Jules," He muttered defensively. His tone firm. "But I am undeniably a spinster" Julianne jokingly pulled her heart broken look. "Mind you, I'm already two and twenty you know," she reminded "Way past the marrying mart"

Johnathan shook his head, grasping her slender shoulders lightly. "It will not be. If you marry me, Jules" Julianne sighed, peeling his fingers off her shoulders and clasped them together in her small hands.

"Johnathan," Julianne beckoned softly when he refused to meet her eyes. "You know how much I love you, brother" Johnathan's hands slipped from her gentle grasp. Julianne hated this conversation. As much as she tried to avoid it and how gently she rejected Johnathan's proposal more than once, it was Johnathan who ends up hurting. Oh, how she loathe herself. "Is it because I am merely a farmer's son?" Julianne's blue eyes rounded horrifically. "God in heaven, you know that is not the reason, Johnathan" Johnathan was silent as he shoved his hands into his pockets and fixed her with a mournful expression.

"What is it then? Is it because I am not titled?" Julianne shook her curls, the locks dancing under her bonnet.

"You know I do not care a fig about titles" Julianne replied, exasperation laced her voice. Johnathan stubbornly averted his eyes, fixing his gaze instead on the fallen oak leaves on his boots.

"We can live off the land when we are married Jules. I can became a tutor and work with papa in the fields" Johnathan pressed on. This time he took her hands and gave it a squeeze.

"I know that someday you will make a good husband to a woman more worthy than me, brother but-" Julianne raised her voice as Johnathan was about to say something. "I am my own woman, Johnathan. I thrived on my freedom" Julianne turned to walk to her waiting gig. She did intend to marry. Of course she had dreamt of having her own family and children clustered her when she was old. But after seeing her father became a monster make her shiver with trepidation. Anyway, she had everything a woman had ever wished for. "You know Jules, you never ceased to astound me" Johnathan admonished, clearly dismissing the uncomfortable discussion earlier on. But Julianne undoubtedly guessed it will surface again sooner. Johnathan took her hand and assisted her onto the seat of the gig.

"Your principles and not to mention your passion are the exact opposite of Ledbury. But you surely inherited his hard head" Johnathan chuckled at the look of hurt on Julianne's face. But she quickly wiped it off and replaced it with a nonchalant shrug of her shoulder.

"Well, as they say brother. Old habits die hard" she took the reins into her gloved hands. "I shall see you at dinner? And oh, please bring the twins and dear Anne along. I do so enjoy their company"

"Eight perhaps?" Johnathan grinned boyishly as he took Julianne's knuckle and brought it to his lips. "Please think about it, will you?" he said simply but Julianne understood quite clearly. She knew that Johnathan will not give up without a fight.

She gave him a brilliant smile instead. "Eight it is"

"Fine, see you then" Julianne wasn't sure but she saw something that she couldn't fathom flickering across Johnathan's face. Flashing him a another encouraging smile, she flicked her reins.