Chapter 1: Internet Chats

Life looks a lot like a river. You can never go back, only forward. People might throw stuff at you, but at the end of the day, all you can do is move forward.

And so, just like the rest of the world, life in Holmes Chapel was going forward. Everyone had their things going on and continued with their lives like nothing ever mattered. But Suzan couldn't do that. She couldn't simply live her life as if nothing was going on. The yelling from downstairs was too tough to ignore.

She rubbed her eyes a bit as she tried to ignore her parents' fighting. She could hear everything from her room. Her blue eyes were tearing up, and she couldn't do anything about it. Yet, she had to pull herself together. She had Cheerleading practice in just about a few minutes and she couldn't go like that. After all, she was the leader.

Suzan knew that all the new Cheerleaders would be there before practice even started. She recalled herself being so excited before she became the leader. Before she became the popular Suzan Ellis everyone was jealous of and admired.

She stood up and headed to her bathroom. She washed her face to the point it would look at least acceptable, and brushed her long, wavy, blonde hair before tying it with a white bow. Her blue eyes were still a bit puffy, but it would go away if she washed them a bit more and pretended she was okay.

Suzan picked up her cheer uniform and put it on. The shirt was sleeveless, with a red and white pattern and the letters 'HCCHS', spelling 'Holmes Chapel Comprehensive High School', following along the pattern in black. The skirt was short, with the same red and white pattern.

Looking at herself in the mirror once again, she looked acceptable, and she could work with that. So, she grabbed her casual, white Tommy shoes and put them on. For practice, she usually liked to wear casual Tommy or Chanel kicks, while on special occasions such as games, pep rallies or competitions, she chose more formal Versace, Louis Vuitton or Gucci shoes.

She was always used to all the expensive things, her family being the richest in town. Her father, Marcus Ellis, owned a successful paper industry in Cheshire with many branches nationwide, while her mother, Joanna Ellis, was an infamous lawyer. Growing up, she lived in a huge house and had everything a girl could possibly ask, yet she was never particularly spoiled.

The girl took her black Cheer backpack and walked downstairs. As soon as her parents saw her, they both stopped talking, pretending nothing was going on, ignoring the fact that Suzan knew it.

"Mom, dad, I'm going to practice."

"Alright, sweetie," said her mom calmly.

Sighing, Suzan walked out and started heading to the warehouse the Cheerleaders had taken over for practice. It belonged to Mr. Grey, the father of Miranda Grey, one of the Cheerleaders, and it looked nothing like a common warehouse. The walls were freshly-painted in a bright, white wall, the floor was stoned and freshly waxed, and there was even a couch with a table and a few chairs stacked against the walls. It was perfect for Cheerleaders with their prestige.

Everyone had already gathered up when Suzan got there. Her best friend, Emily Grason, ran to her.

"Finally, Sue! We were starting to get worried, what took you so long?" she asked her.

"Um, nothing. I guess I just lost track of time?" Suzan replied carelessly.

But Emily knew what was going on. She sighed, "Is it what I think it is?"

Suzan simply nodded. Emily knew perfectly well what was going on in Suzan's house. Being best friends, they both knew everything about each other, plus, Emily had been present to some fights.

She wasn't going through a little herself either. Mr. Grason, her father, had died of cancer five years ago when Emily was just eleven, and it was just her and her mother ever since. Given that Mrs. Grason was a flight attendant and had to be gone often, Emily was left alone in the house or stayed at Suzan's when her mother would be gone for a long time. That came in handy for killer sleepovers or parties, because Mrs. Grason could handle a few girls sneaking Tequila, but when it came to a hundred crazy teenagers, it was too much.

Suzan was always there for Emily when she needed someone to talk to, but so was Emily. It was obvious, being such good friends as they were. They knew each other ever since they were babies, since their parents were very close, as Mr. Grason was also a lawyer and worked with Suzan's mother.

They knew everything about each other and that's why they'd always been so close. And they wouldn't stop until the end.

"Look, it's all going to be fine. Iʼm here for anything you might need and you know that, so, just relax, okay?" Emily told Suzan.

"Yes, Em, thank you," smiled Suzan.

All the cheerleaders got in position and started with practice. Suzan took Emilyʼs advice and relaxed, meaning that she didnʼt let anything distract her from her practice. Thatʼs what she always did. No matter how awful she was feeling, she always gave everything to Cheerleading. Thatʼs why she was the leader anyway.

A couple of hours later, practice was over. All the girls chatter happily for a while until they start leaving one by one. The two best friends were the only ones left behind.

"What. A. Day!" Emily exclaimed, making Suzan giggle a bit. "So, my mom left today and sheʼll be back on Sunday, so, I was thinking: sleepover at my house today, just us, then party on Saturday. How does that sound?"

Suzan thought for a second. "Awesome, I guess."

Before she had the chance to say anything else, her phone rang. She looked at the caller ID, and it was her boyfriend, Jason Simons.

"Hey, Jason," she answered.

"Hey babe, done with practice?" he asked, even though he knew the answer, having perfectly memorized every last part of her schedule.

"Um, yeah. Just now."

"Great. Better tell your parents you're sleeping at Emily's or something 'cause we are going out tonight and then my house."

"Um, Jason, I was actually going to sleep at Emi—" she said, not managing to finish her sentence.

"Well, I donʼt care, I said we're going out. Bye," he said, and, just like that, he hung up the phone.

"Guess I'll be going out, then," she sighed.

"You know what, Sue? In just a few days you're gonna mark a year with him and I canʼt believe youʼre still letting him control you!" said Emily.

"Iʼm not letting him control me, Em!" Suzan protested.

"Yeah, right! Come on, you never say 'no' to him! Anything Jason wants, you give him! Jason wants to go out, you go! Jason wants to sleep with you, you go! I mean, come on!"

"I sleep with him cause I want to, not cause he makes me!"

"And what about the times you donʼt want?" Emily crossed her arms. "Take me and Bobby, for example. He doesnʼt force me to go out with him or sleep with him; he waits!"

"Look, Emily, you and Bobby are both sixteen! Jason is eighteen and he has different needs!"

"Which sometimes get too possessive and dangerous!" Emily replied, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, you know heʼs on drugs! Heʼs nice deep inside, drugs just control him sometimes!" said Suzan, as if it was normal.

"Look, I know there will be a day pretty soon that you'll realize heʼs no good for you, so I wonʼt try to convince you anymore. Letʼs just get to your house, okay?" Emily gave up, knowing that, no matter what excuse Suzan was finding, she was always too scared to break up with Jason.

So, the two girls started heading to Suzanʼs house, where she could get changed and she could pick up everything she needed for the night.

Her parents had stopped fighting by the time she got home. Her father was sitting on his armchair, watching the news and her mom was reading a magazine on the couch.

"Hey, mom, hey, dad," she sighed.

"Hey, sweetie, hey Emily," Mrs. Ellis replied, "How was practice?"

"It was nice, thanks. Can I sleep at Emilyʼs tonight?" she asked.

"Sure, love. Have fun," her father told her. The truth was, when his daughter was out he had the opportunity to really talk things out with his wife, things they couldn't say with Suzan being there.

"Thanks," she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek, before heading upstairs to her room with Emily.

Suzan grabbed a pair of leggings and a casual Chanel shirt and went into the bathroom to change, while Emily was putting pajamas and an outfit for the night in Suzanʼs sleepover bag, knowing exactly what her friend wanted to take with her. Along with her school backpack for the next day, the girls each got one bag and left the room.

"Bye mom, bye dad, Iʼm leaving," said Suzan once she was downstairs, and gave each of them a kiss on the cheek.

"Okay, love, have a great time!" her father said calmly, fully trusting his daughter as he always had.

Suzan flashed him a quick smile as she opened the door for her and Emily to leave.

"Bye Mr. and Mrs. Ellis!" called Emily as the two of them walked out.

They walked across Suzanʼs huge front yard and went out on the street, walking towards Emilyʼs house a few streets away. They were talking about Emilyʼs party when the brunetteʼs phone rang.

"Itʼs Bobby!" Emily squealed with a smile from one ear to another.

Suzan grinned slightly at the sight of her friend. It had been a long time since Suzan had last reacted so excitedly when she saw Jasonʼs name on the caller ID. She was sort of jealous of her friend, just knowing Emily and Bobby would never end up like her and Jason, and even hoping for it to never happen too.

Even if she wouldnʼt admit it in front of Emily, Suzan was tired of that situation with Jason and only needed a little push to turn into more of a bitch than any blonde girl that has ever existed in any movie. She could very easily be that way, she just chose not to.

She knew that she and Jason were way over the 'fun' part of a relationship and what was left was the bothering and the physical contact. That wasnʼt enough for her, but, knowing her boyfriend, she was a bit scared to ask for more.

Lost in her thoughts, Suzan only snapped out of them when Emily nudged her shoulder.

"Sue, wake up!"

"Huh? What is it?"

Emily sighed, knowing her friendʼs bad habit of drifting off to her thoughts in the weirdest places; the middle of the street, this time.

"Wanna go get coffee with the guys?" she asked.

"I, uh... Iʼm not sure Jason would like that very much and—" Suzan protested, though got cut off by Emily.

"Great, we're going!" the brunette smiled cheerfully.

Suzan looked down, sighing, knowing she wouldnʼt be able to escape this. She wanted to get coffee with her friends, she really did, but Jason never really liked her going out without him, so she knew she was going to be in trouble if he found out. Yet, she was willing to take that risk to spend some time with her friends.

The two girls reached Emilyʼs house and walked in. Her mother wasnʼt there, as she had already left earlier that day, so they had the house to themselves.

A while later, they left and started heading to the nearby cafe the friend group usually liked to hang out at, called 'Glass N' Mugʼ.

Emily looked at Sue with a caring look on her face, "I wonʼt start nagging you about Jason again, but, you know, he canʼt forbid you to see your friends."

Suzan sighed, not wanting to get on that subject again, knowing it would lead nowhere. "Please, Em?"

"Fine, fine..."

The girls reached 'Glass N' Mugʼ and found their friends sitting at a table, though they werenʼt alone. Right there, playing with his phone, was Harry Styles, a boy Suzan was never really familiar with. He wasnʼt the most popular guy at school either, even though he was in a band, since being popular was a privilege not many people had, other than Suzan —who was the most popular girl—, her friend group and some other people, mostly jocks, Cheerleaders and Divas.

Suzanʼs friend group consisted of seven people: three boys and four girls. Of course, there was Suzan and Emily, then two more girls, Maryse Lenon and Lexi Clyve. And the boys, Bobby Criss, Isaac Jones and Theodore Huggins. They were all very different from each other, despite being extremely close.

Suzan was the most popular out of them. She was the peaceful one, who always tried to be calm and avoid fights. She was very nice, sensitive and quiet, even though she loved to party and often enjoyed being the center of attention. She knew many languages and did well in school, giving out the overall impression of a 'good girlʼ.

February 28th would mark her one-year anniversary with her boyfriend, Jason. The way they had met was pretty simple: they were drunk at a party and started making out, and so, the next day, after a lot of hitting on her, Jason asked her to be his girl.

Emily was the dynamic girl among the friend group. She had a strong personality and never let anyone walk over her. She could be caring and loving, but never let her guard down. She had been dating Bobby for six months after two whole months of constant flirting with each other.

Then Bobby was the super athletic type, who was overprotective towards his friends and always very sarcastic. He was kind of dumb compared to the rest, who had these perfect grades, and often said stupid things, but everyone loved that about him.

Maryse was very serious and quiet, but always very sweet. She was always very independent and big-time feminist, thatʼs why she didnʼt want a boyfriend, saying that they were too much trouble and a girl was better off without them. She was very artistic, loving any form of art. When she was younger, she always got bullied because of her skin tone, as she was dark-skinned, but it all stopped when she started hanging out with Suzan and joined the Cheer squad.

Lexi, also a Cheerleader, was the exact opposite of that. She was extremely loud and girly, she was the social one. She never focused on school, as she was more interested in chasing after boys, or, more likely, in boys chasing after her. She was definitely the craziest one of the group. She was never in a serious relationship, and her longest one had probably lasted for about a couple of months.

Isaac was probably the smartest and most serious of them. He was always very serious, but he could be funny at times, and he was smart enough to know exactly when he should. He was so smart, logical and realistic that he could see and analyze situations perfectly, causing him to prevent things before they happened, and he was always right in anything he said or prevented. He had recently broken up from a three-week relationship with a school Diva and long time enemy of Suzanʼs, Madison Hensler, but didnʼt really care about it, and was also on the school football team with Bobby. He was the friend anyone would trust their lives to and gave the best advice. Still, he had a bad habit of smoking, but didn't smoke much and nobody knew about it.

Then last but not least, was Theodore, the sensitive one. He had moved with his family from Liverpool to Holmes Chapel when he first started High School but adapted to the new environment rather quickly. He was on the football team as well and in a two-month relationship with Miranda Grey, a Cheerleader. He was super kind and sensitive, and that's what everyone adored most about him.

Harry, though, wasnʼt in the friend group, he just hung out with the boys sometimes, and Suzan knew almost nothing about him. All she knew was that he had a sister Suzan had met a couple of times, he was in a band with some of his friends at school called 'White Eskimoʼ and that on weekends, he worked in a bakery which was near her house and her family went there sometimes. Apart from the fact that he hung out with Suzanʼs friends, she never really spoke to him.

"Hey, guys! Hey, gorgeous!" smiled Emily as she kissed Bobby.

"Hey!" Bobby hugged her and kissed back, before looking at Suzan. "Well, well, well, Sue! Your boyfriend finally allowed you to go out?"

"Knock it off!" Suzan rolled her eyes. "How are you, guys?" she asked everyone, avoiding the subject of Jason, knowing nobody on the table liked him.

"Yeah, we're fine," Isaac replied, "Just called Lexi and Maryse, they ainʼt cominʼ, theyʼre shoppinʼ," he said, speaking fast as he always did.

"Shit, they wonʼt hear about the party then… And I forgot to tell them at practice too… Hey, Isaac, text them real quick and tell ʼem about it!"

"Wow, slow down there," said Isaac, pretty ironic coming from him as he was always speaking fast, "what party?"

"Oh, right, well, my mom left today so I was thinking of having a party on Saturday!"

"Sure, that sounds good."

"So, any plans for tonight?" Bobby smirked at Emily.

"Actually, yes!" she said, disappointing Bobby a bit, who seemed to have other plans for the two of them. "Jason asked Suzan to go out and I was thinking we could go too?" she asked everyone.

"Jason, really?" Theodore sighed.

"I know you guys donʼt like him, but at least you like me, so just do it as a favor?" Suzan begged them.

"Fine, we're doing it for you, but, Iʼm telling you, if he or his buddies try anything funny, we'll kick his ass!" said Bobby, and the others agreed.

Suzan noticed that Harry hadnʼt really been talking but playing with his phone instead, and she supposed he just didnʼt want to get caught between a friendsʼ conversation. If Bobby hadn't spoken to him, he wouldn't have said anything at all.

"Harry, you're coming?"

Harry looked at him, the first time Suzan saw his green eyes from this close. "Nah, I don't think so, I got work tomorrow," he said, and the others were fine with it. Well, he wasn't rich like the others were and they didn't really know what it was like to work, but they understood.

"So, where are we goinʼ?" asked Isaac, carelessly.

"'Venomʼ, probably..." said Suzan.

"Really? That front guy asks for too much money to let us in!" Bobby complained.

"Oh, Jasonʼs highness doesnʼt mind, he and his friends are the only ones old enough to get in legally!" Isaac said sarcastically.

"You know what, guys? We're lucky enough that Jason is friends with the security guy and heʼll let us in —even if we have to pay!" Suzan tried to defend him.

"Oh, so now the people he sells drugs to are his friends?" Emily said.

Suzan rolled her eyes and changed the subject for the rest of the time. Harry only spoke a bit during the whole time, perhaps he was shy because of the girls being there. Still, not talking about Jason, the friends had a great time and Suzan hoped he wouldnʼt find out.

The day went off rather fast after they went back home, and the girls started getting ready.

They both got dressed, did their hair and makeup and took a couple of pictures for Facebook. When they were ready, all they could do was wait for Jason and his friends to come pick them up, something Bobby wasnʼt very fond of, as he didnʼt like Emily being anywhere close to them.

Jason had two friends: Terence Michaels and Angelo Flatts. The three of them, although not very popular, were the bullies of the school, and no one really liked them. They were more like his sidekicks, mimicking everything Jason did. He and Angelo had been friends since childhood, while Terence joined them in middle school.

Terence was a skinny, tall boy who actually used to be a nice kid before he started hanging out with them, while Angelo was a rather burly boy, who had always been just like Jason.

A honk echoed outside of Emilyʼs house, interrupting the two girlsʼ talk about the up and coming party, and they knew it was Angeloʼs car.

"Well, our ride is here..." Emily said sarcastically as the two of them stood up and walked out.

Opening the door, the first thing they saw was Jason leaning against the car, the silhouette of his tall and fit body in the darkness of the night —despite his bad reputation, nobody could deny that he was rather handsome— while Terence was with him and Angelo was waiting in the car.

As soon as he saw Suzan approaching, Jason grabbed her waist and kissed her lips with aggressive passion. "Hey, babe."

Emily rolled her eyes at him. "Like, seriously, ew!"

Jason looked at her, amused by her reaction. "Hello, Ms. Grason. You donʼt need to be jealous, you can have one too!" he mocked her.

"Ew, shut up! Idiot!" Emily shouted, which seemed to amuse Jason even more as he just loved pissing Emily off.

Knowing her boyfriend was like that and wouldnʼt change, Suzan couldnʼt do anything but roll her eyes. "Look, can we just go?"

Everyone squeezed inside Angeloʼs car as he drove to club 'Venomʼ, the only club they could go to since everyone except Jason and his friends was underage and the reason they were allowed in this club was because they paid the security man at the door who was friends with Jason.

By the time they got there, Bobby, Isaac and Theodore were already waiting for them in the front door. After saying 'hiʼ to each other —including a lot of death glaring between the two sides of the boys— and a few kisses between Bobby and Emily, they got in the club.

Suzan was extremely worried about what was to come that night, as Jason had already gotten high by smoking weed in the car with his friends, which, followed by all the drinks he was having, was definitely not a good sign.

Everyone was dancing and mingling with people, except Isaac and Theodore, who were just sitting at the bar talking.

Jason was, as always, too much for Suzan to handle, as he was grabbing all over her curves, kissing her aggressively and making a scene. He always acted like this, especially when he was drunk and high. Sue was calmly trying to push him away, but it was obvious that the alcohol and drugs had gotten the better of him again.

All of a sudden, he started sliding his hand under her skirt and trying to pull her underwear down.

"Jason, what are you doing?" she pushed him away as calmly as she could.

"You know…" he mumbled playfully against her ear, stinking of booze.

If Suzan knew one thing was that she had to get him out of there as quickly as possible, before he actually tried taking her inside the club.

"Yeah, um, I think itʼs better to go home..." she told him as calmly as she possibly could at that point.

"Where the fuck is Angelo?" he left off to find his friend, losing balance in his every step.

"Great… " Suzan thought to herself, "yet another night to spend with this psycho..."

She patiently waited for Jason to show up with Angelo so he could drive them to Jasonʼs house, knowing she wouldnʼt be able to avoid this.

A few minutes later, Jason was desperately trying to unlock the door of his house while drinking a full bottle of whiskey he had snatched from Angeloʼs car.

There was nobody at his house, since he had no siblings in life and his parents and brother were all dead. They had died in a car accident when Jason was just twelve, and he went through a lot of trouble to avoid living in an orphanage. He started working at that young of age in horrible circumstances and mental and physical abuse, and when he was fourteen, he took drugs for the first time and started dealing them too. He was slowly entering even deeper into the world of the streets and soon interacted with gangs and sold guns as well.

Suzan waited quietly for the door to open, just trying to get things over with. It had turned to a routine every night she was with Jason and she just wanted it to end as quickly as possible.

Jason finally managed to open the door and headed with Suzan in his room, kissing and grabbing her all over. He threw her on the bed and got on top of her, still kissing her, receiving no reaction from Suzan, she just wanted it to be over with.

"There you are, pretty..." Jason mumbled, intoxicated and his gaze dripping of lust as he started undressing her.

Once Sue was in just her underwear, Jason gave her one last look full of lust, before he passed out. It all happened very suddenly, but Suzan wasnʼt surprised. In fact, she was relieved. It had happened a few times before, and she knew it was because of all the drinking, so she didnʼt worry. Heʼd be okay the next morning.

Knowing he liked to sleep in just his boxers, Suzan quietly took his shirt, pants and shoes off and tucked him under the covers, still grateful about the fact she avoided what could have happened again. Well, she had been avoiding it the same way for about a month now, and she couldn't be more relieved.

She knew she couldnʼt leave even if she wanted, as, if Jason woke up the next morning and didnʼt find her there, heʼd be very angry and she didnʼt want that.

Yet, she didnʼt feel like sleeping yet, so she decided to stay up for some time, before having to lay beside him, especially when she saw his computer on his old, half-broken desk.

So, knowing his password —she had peeked at it when she saw him opening it once— she sat on the chair in front of the desk and opened his computer, curious to see what he was up to, as he never shared anything with her.

First thing that popped onto the screen when the computer opened was a chat window he had forgotten to close. Suzan didnʼt suspect anything, thinking it would probably be with Terence or Angelo. Yet, just of plain curiosity, she decided to take a look at the conversation.

Then she saw it. Something that shocked her. A message that definitely wasnʼt from Terence or Angelo: 'You were sooo good last night baby... we should do this again ;)ʼ.

𝓢𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓻𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓻𝓾𝓷...