Chapter 1444: What Should I Do? (Part 4)

For a long time, Tang Gunak remained silent, gazing at the sky without saying a word.

'Happiness...'

Perhaps Chung Myung's words were right.

Did the founder of the Tang family, who first took root in the unfamiliar and remote land of Sichuan, really hope for his descendants to make a name for themselves throughout the world?

Probably not.

He probably just hoped for peace for his family living in a strange and distant land, and their descendants. That may be why they taught themselves how to build fences and protect themselves.

"...In the end, your words..."

When Tang Gunak looked towards Chung Myung, Chung Myung coughed awkwardly and naturally wiped his face with his sleeve. Then, he casually shrugged his shoulders.

"Poison is important, of course. Hidden weapons are important too. And the prestige of the Tang family is also important."

"...Yes."

"But aren't those just means for those belonging to the Tang family to live a peaceful life? The more they gain, the safer the people of the Tang family will be."

Tang Gunak nodded his head. It was indeed a valid point.

"But people are strange. If they cling to the means to achieve their goals, at some point, the means become the goal. Like..."

"Like me now?"

Chung Myung shook his head.

"I'm not just saying this to Gaju-nim. The Tang family became like that at some point. Since a long time ago."

If those stars above Tang Gunak, who looked down at him, were the eyes of the Tang family, there would also be the eyes of Tang Bo among them.

'He was frustrated.'

Tang Bo realized that early on. Even though he saw the limits of poison, he found those who clung to it strange and tried tirelessly to break that mold.

But what he faced was a formidable fortress named family law, firmly armed and unbreakable. No matter how loud he raised his voice, he couldn't change anything on his own, even as an elder of the family.

The fact that Tang Bo was unable to attach himself to the family, and eventually roamed the world, the fact that he sought out Chung Myung and tried to enhance his reputation through a martial arts challenge, was his own effort to change what couldn't be changed.

'A bundle of contradictions.'

He despised the Tang family, but at the same time, he never let go of the Tang Family throughout his life. Even at his last breath.

After all, was Tang Bo the only one who lived with unsolvable contradictions?

"I heard that those who make poison for the Tang family can never leave the fence of the Tang family for their entire lives."

"...That's right."

To prevent leaks. If they left the Tang family and were captured by hostile forces, numerous secrets about the Tang family would be revealed.

"The artisans are the same. Those who have learned the craftsmanship of the Tang family are bound to the Tang family for their entire lives."

"..."

"The women can't say anything without hurting their mouths."

Tang Gunak nodded heavily.

He knew. The fact that those who supported the Tang family led a difficult life. That the name of the Tang family was established on the sacrifices of many.

"But even so, the Tang men who learn martial arts through such sacrifice do not live such a great life. One can tell that just by looking at Gaju-nim, right?"

"...When you look at me, what do you see?"

"You always do this with your eyebrows."

Chung Myung wrinked his forehead with his finger. At the somewhat comical imitation, Tang Gunak burst into laughter.

"...Isn't that inevitable? I'm the head."

"Who decided that?"

"Hmm?"

"Who decided that the head must carry all the burdens and somehow make the Tang family the strongest martial arts sect in the world? Wasn't that Gaju-nim's dream in the first place?"

Tang Gunak closed his mouth. Normally, he would have answered, 'That's right.' But now, those words didn't come out easily.

He just believed in it.

From his childhood, he simply knew that he had to be like that.

"Gaju-nim is not that kind of person."

"...Why do you think that?"

"Just by looking at how you treat Soso. Gaju-nim is just someone who wishes Soso to be happy. It won't be any different for the other disciples."

Tang Gunak couldn't find words to refute. Meanwhile, Chung Myung spoke again.

"It's a sad thing. Because a system created for everyone to be happy was gradually making everyone suffer. But at some point, it became something that everyone had to endure as a matter of course."

Tang Gunak opened his mouth with a slightly hardened voice.

"Mount Hua's Chivalrous Sword. But how can you know the intentions of the ancestors who created the Tang family?"

"I know."

"...Can you really know?"

"Yes. It's easy to know, especially if it's about the Tang Family."

Chung Myung's words made Tang Gunak furrow his brow. Wasn't this too bold a statement?

"How can you know? They are people from hundreds of years ago."

"Still, it's the same. Even if it's not hundreds but thousands of years ago... Parents' feelings towards their children don't change."

For a moment, Tang Gunak stared blankly at Chung Myung.

"Parents... did you say?"

"Yes. Although we use grand words like ancestors, those people were ultimately just parents who worried about their children after they died."

Chung Myung chuckled softly.

"Do you think those guys really worried about the future head of the family hundreds of years later? It's unlikely."

"Yeah, probably not."

"See, it's simple. What was the reason those people made such laws? What did they truly desire?"

Chung Myung's laughter subsided slightly. He spoke quietly while gazing fixedly at the sky.

"I don't really know what parental love is, but I understand the feelings of a teacher looking at their disciple or a sibling looking at their brother."

Chung Myung's gaze slowly moved from the sky to the side. Beyond the dense reeds, in the unseen place, the people of the Mount Hua Sect were sleeping.

"It would be nice to become stronger."

"..."

"But it shouldn't be too excessive either. It becomes tough then. It's enough if you're satisfied on your own, but those guys are too greedy."

"...Didn't you make them like that?"

"Yes."

Chung Myung nodded.

"It would be good if it's just about right, but I don't know where that moderation is. Just when I think it's enough, thoughts come up again. What if stronger guys attack us? What if I'm not there at that time? What should I do?"

"...I understand."

"Huh? What?"

"That's something that happens when you're a coward."

Chung Myung wrinkled his face and grumbled.

"I don't think there's much difference between us."

"...I can't deny that."

Tang Gunak chuckled knowingly. Nothing was really resolved. However, as they continued talking, somehow, Tang Gunak felt more at ease.

"Parents...?"

What kind of life did they want their children to live?

What did the human Tang Gunak want, not the head of the Tang Family?

Then, Chung Myung spoke again.

"It's really difficult. Even parents and children who spend their entire lives together find it hard to fully understand each other's intentions. Since people can't ultimately see into others' hearts."

"..."

"But you can make an educated guess."

"Since it would be that way for my heart."

"Yes, that's right."

Tang Gunak nodded. He seemed to understand what Chung Myung was trying to say.

There was no need to ponder on what the ancestors' hearts were like. He just needed to become the ancestor of the clan himself.

"Now, in the current situation where we have to change territories and settle in unfamiliar places, what I want for my children is..."

Tang Gunak closed his eyes.

Now, he vaguely felt the hearts of the ancestors. It seemed like that because he was in such a position now.

"You can't do anything about what you've lost. Regret and resentment won't bring it back. If you want to blame yourself, go ahead."

"..."

"However."

Chung Myung's gaze drifted to a distant place.

"There are things you can only understand after losing. So, because you lost, there are things you can gain."

Tang Gunak silently clenched his fist.

"I'm sure of it. In any form... those who have lost what they shouldn't have lost become stronger."

Tang Gunak nodded silently, affirming Chung Myung's words.

If he had heard what Chung Myung was saying now just a few days ago, before things turned out like this, Tang Gunak probably wouldn't have been able to empathize. He would've dedicated his life to making things that were already solid even stronger, even if it meant making it difficult for those he cherished.

Tang Gunak stared intently at Chung Myung.

"Mount Hua's Chivalrous Sword. So, is that why you gathered those people?"

"...Huh?"

"The Heavenly Comrade Alliance."

It was truly unfortunate.

Most of those belonging to the Heavenly Comrade Alliance were those who had lost something significant. With the current state of the Tang Family, this fact became even more apparent.

"...No, it's not like I intentionally gathered them. I just ended up with those guys as I collected people."

"..."

"It just happened. One came, then another. Before I knew it, there were quite a few of them."

"That's true..."

"I guess those guys just needed someone. We happened to be there, and those who haven't suffered don't need to seek anyone. It just so happened that those who suffered came across each other."

Chung Myung chuckled heartily.

"And in the first place, those who are a bit lacking tend to stick together."

As he and Tang Bo did. Those who shared a similar pain tended to come together.

"So, there's no special or grand reason for it. I just... couldn't leave them alone, you know."

A tinge of bitterness lingered on Chung Myung's lips. He just went along with the deep and vivid emotions of someone who lost something. He couldn't bear to refuse.

"So, even if I were to go back to the past, it would probably be the same. Regretting, lamenting the losses, wondering why I had to shed blood and fight for something..."

Chung Myung closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, his gaze was clear.

"But still, I'll go. Call it a stupid act or whatever."

Unknowingly, Tang Gunak let out a deep sigh.

"...Stupid indeed."

"Tsk."

However, Chung Myung, without acknowledging his remark, suddenly stood up. With a puzzled expression, Tang Gunak looked up.

"Hmm?"

"I'm going."

"...All of a sudden?"

"Gaju-nim also needs some time alone."

Chung Myung grinned and turned around. No, he didn't turn around, but instead, took a step closer to Tang Gunak.

"Huh?"

Tap!

He reached out and lightly tapped Tang Gunak's shoulder. And as if pushing down slightly, he put strength into his shoulder.

"...What?"

"All right then."

Chung Myung, after making the enigmatic gesture, turned around and walked away. Watching him leave without any hesitation, Tang Gunak, staring at his back, opened his mouth.

"By the way, Mount Hua's Chivalrous Sword."

"Yes?"

Chung Myung turned around at the mention of it.

"...Thank you."

Then Chung Myung, who was watching Tang Gunak in silence, pointed his finger up.

"Thank those above."

It was an incomprehensible phrase. Chung Myung's figure moved away, and Tang Gunak, looking up at the sky again, could see countless stars shining brightly against the dark sky.

Until a while ago, the light of those stars felt like they were watching and admonishing him, but now, it didn't feel so cold.

He smoothed out the sleeves of his robe. Suddenly, a foolish smile escaped his lips.

"After all that... he didn't say a word about what I should do."

He shook his head and closed his eyes tightly.

He knew. That was something no one else could decide. The path that only he must decide. Only his fight.

But...in this lonely fight, something small was with him.

The little warmth left by Chung Myung. The warmth that seemed to be transmitted from somewhere was soaking into Tang Gunak's shoulders.