Rebirth To Love Myself: The New Beginning Of The Villainess

"I want to live my life the way I want to. Not for others but for myself. I'll be the one who will love myself, if there's none to love me. And I'll never let go of those who are willing to stay with me no matter what."

Those were the last sentences Elizara had uttered before her eyes closed permanently for that day, as blood kept on gushing out of her stomach.... or that was what she had thought.

But never in the world she had ever thought that she would be reborn. And that too, before the tragedy started. She got another chance in life.

As she kept on tossing and turning on the soft bed of the room, she figured out that she was indeed back. She didn't die but came back. And what's more, her sealed abilities were all released. The abilities that she wanted to unseal for all her life was finally released.

With this abilities... she didn't need to bow her head to anyone ever again.

The excitement of rebirth as well as the unbound powers in her, she finally couldn't calm down anymore as she sat up straight on the bed and looked around the large, partially dark room.

She stood up from the bed and tiptoed near the window. Her eyes scanned the houses which were clearly visible from her room window, in the dark night.

A bitter smile formed on her lips as she thought back to her previous life. This was the place, these were citizens, she loved the most. She gave her all to these people.

But... What did she get it return?

Betrayal. Endless Pain. And then Backstabbed.

Her own husband never cared about her after marrying her. He would only look for her when he needed her, and that to in the means of his aide, not him physically. She was never allowed to stand side by side with him. Never! Even until the momemt she was killed, he never looked at her way.

For God's sake, she was his wife. Wife of the Emperor Oliseno Danning de Arbeteria, The Empress Elizara Oliseno Danning de Arbeteria.

But, he never gave her the respect of her status she had every right to. And she was a fool who believed that if she kept on trying she would be worthy of him and he would look at her way lovingly.

After all, she had shut down the bitter truth in her memory prison... And that was she was randomly picked up by him in the Emperor's Woman Selection since she 'fitted' the look and demeanor of an Empress. A noble posture, beautiful face and harem management skills.

And she thought that 22 year old Emperor fell for her, a girl who was approximately near his age, at their first sight like she did.

Hah! How naive a 19 year old Elizara was!

And that son of hers... that she got from him in that loveless marriage, that little thing never respected her, making the words 'Mother and Son' too foreign for her.

Each time she would try to talk with him, that 8 year old brat would over react, thinking she was trying to harm him. Hah! She was his mother even though she wasn't the one who carried him for more than half a year.

How could a mother ever harm her son? But he never understood her, Never.

In fact, no one ever understood her. Or try to.

And since she was the Empress, she didn't even have the right to complain or cry. She could only smile elegantly and agree with the males of the palace. And cope up with their mockery. Either the Prime Minister, Marquees, Dukes or the Bulter of His Majesty.

All looked down upon her!

As for her maternal family, she bet they only know her when they need help from the palace. Her brothers and father never paid any attention to her since she was the reason her mother died while giving birth to her. But what was her fault in that?

She didn't have any self knowledge at that time. She was just a new born. How could she control life and death?

Or was that really her fault? Should she have never born in the first place?

Those thoughts always haunted her. In her previous life.

But now that she got a second chance, those things didn't matter to her anymore. After getting the taste of death, she didn't want to die again!

She now wants to live. The way she wants to. Not for others, but for herself.

Father? Brothers? Husband? Son?

They never cared about her when she self-lessly cared for them... Now she want to be selfish. Enjoy her life, the way she wants to, without caring those scrutinizing eyes.

And this will start from tomorrow. But at first, she needed to do that major thing... Leave this place... Leave kingdom Arbeteria.

And find them. Those people.

Her partners... Her only friends who supported her unconditionally.

.

.

.

Elizara lifted her body a little as she positioned herself on the window lane with one foot raised. If she remembered correctly, she was just 25 this year.

Her Step-son, Arnold Danning de Arbeteria was just 8 now. Yet, the deep rooted hatred had long taken place in his heart from God-knows-where, since the day she stepped into the palace.

In her past life, she had been trying to please the father-son pair with her all, so that she could have a happy family. And if she could, she also wanted a little princess in their small world. But now... Never mind!

At hand, she first needed to find a substitute to replace her place. A substitute Empress who will work instead of her for Her husband and manage the Harem of 8 women, excluding her.

At first, she wanted to give that task to Mina, the woman who is recently favoured by the Emperor. She had heard that he had brought her back after the forest hunt and hence he would often visit her once a week no matter what, which was really rare for him. After all, He was busier than a bee and didn't have that much time to visit his other women, including herself.

That night, Elizara sat on the window lane as she kept on planning what to do and how to do. And she kept on changing plans here and there, until she settled to use her magical powers for now.

After a clear thought, she created a figure with her magic that looked exactly like her and made it sit on the empress chair. And then pouted aggrievedly, "If only I was a little strong, this shadow of mine would be walking and talking no sooner it was made. But look... Hah! Never mind. It still needs five hours at least to behave like a normal human."

With a one last glance on her shadow figure, she again got lost in her own thoughts and plans. As the time passed, she got more excited as she thought about how her future was going to be.

So, surprisingly yet unsurprisingly, she got up late next day as she had fallen asleep too late at night.

The palace guards and maids were surprise to see the silence in the room, but it was only restricted to surprise. No one cared to remind her to have breakfast, highlighting how poorly they were treating the Mother of Their Nation.

Yet, it gave the freedom and time Elizara needed. She swiftly instilled more of our magic powers in the figure that soon started to blink and bow with courtesy to her creator, "Master."

"Good! Good!" Elizara exclaimed happily as she clapped her hands a little, "You know what you have to do, right? Just sit here and complete the documents on the table. I've already given you my share of the memories."

"Yes, master."

"Okay, then," Elizara grabbed a black coat as she got dressed in all black with a black shirt and pants like men and stood at the window, "I'm leaving then. Deal with those who intrudes in my room just like how I used to deal."

"Okay, Master."

With that, Elizara jumped out of the window and slowly by avoiding the palace eyes, she headed to go out for the day.

So, that day, the palace guards and maids eventually got another shock when they saw their Mistress's abnormal behaviour who stayed in their room for the whole day without coming out and visiting the Emperor and the Crown Prince.

After all, as Elizara had decided to live her life to the fullest, she tactically didn't give orders to her shadow to look for her stoic, cold husband or that irritating step-son of hers.