webnovel

merged with wsa work

Auteur: illeannne
Fantastique
Actuel · 378.9K Affichage
  • 1 Shc
    Contenu
  • 4.9
    38 audimat
  • N/A
    SOUTIEN
Synopsis

This work has been merged with my new wsa work, "Sorry, I Never Loved You". You might see arcs from this work be repeated over there.

Étiquettes
1 étiquettes
Chapter 1let's moveee!

go over to my profile and add "Sorry, I Never Loved You" into your libraries~

月越约曰岳

Vous aimerez aussi
Table des matières
Volume 1 :del

audimat

  • Tarif global
  • Qualité de l’écriture
  • Mise à jour de la stabilité
  • Développement de l’histoire
  • Conception des personnages
  • Contexte mondial
Critiques
Aimé
Nouveau
ssscarlettt
ssscarletttLv10

Disclaimer: I'm a friend of the author. You should know what I'm entailing by that. First of all, I'm reading this for the first time unlike with the other story. I can't compare it with a past version, so let's just take a look at what's here. Story wise: - The first arc's ending was kind of rushed. For those who dislike romance, congrats. The first arc didn't have romance even until Yue Ling died. The arc focused more around the musical elements, which I appreciate. Other stories sometimes focus too much on the romance part. That's not a bad thing, but their identity becomes.. worthless? - Yue Ling is a decent MC. We don't know that much yet, but she has some kind of secret. I've already guessed what the secret might be but let's see... - Her abilities are kind of OP. Even without learning from the System, she seem to have a cheat (?) that makes her proficient in that particular skill. Then again, it's only been two arcs, so we've only seen her pull out two different skills. - No ML in sight, at least for now. Writing wise: - Good pacing. Sometimes it gets too slow but not to the point of boredom. - Grammar mistakes are not that noticeable. - Characters are connected in one way or another, I didn't see anybody get thrown out after having served their purpose. - The chapters are pretty cohesive, but sometimes the paragraphs either get too long or there is a sudden info dump being dropped on us without warning. She tells us that she'll repeat the details over and over to make us remember, that's pretty nice. P.S: I swear to God if you don't pay me after this I- jk jk

MoonBerry
MoonBerryLv5

As of chapter 14, I'm enjoying this story! Though, it's still in the early chapters of the web novel, so I can't say if I'll drop it in the future. Regarding grammar, I have no major gripes; the sentence structure is usually clear and concise, which makes it easy on the eyes. It's doesn't require you to re-read a sentence to understand the meaning, so it's not a chore to read. The only things I feel could be improved would be the character design and world building. First, the character design of the two leads: MC and ML... I hope later on into the story you'll explore the main character's past and why she was unfazed upon discovering the system, because it's strange how easily she excepted her situation. I'd also like to see more vulnerable moments from her, where she showcases actual negative emotions, instead of the feelings of her "role". (I mean that she doesn't seem to mind transmigrating to a different world and doesn't need to adjust, she's just a natural actor...) Currently, she seems slightly robotic to me because of how laid-back and carefree she is, despite experiencing an impossible course of events. Now the ML (Of the first world): So far, I kinda don't like him. He falls directly into the cliche, "I'm a possessive, cold CEO". I understand if that was intended, but, I've read it so many times that it's quite boring. I much rather would've liked: "He seems cold, but is actually really shy". It's a trope I've seen much less times and it's always adorable; But hey, that's just personal taste. Overall, It's a pretty nice story, just some parts seem cliche.

AnairaG72
AnairaG72Lv2

SOUTIEN

empty img

À venir