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Issei The Perfect Being (Remastered)

Auteur: AKIRA_0
Anime et bandes dessinées
Actuel · 1.4M Affichage
  • 5 Shc
    Contenu
  • 4.0
    44 audimat
  • N/A
    SOUTIEN
Synopsis

Abandoned by his family, Hyoudou Issei rose through the ranks until he became the strongest. This is the story of The Perfect Being. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ OVERPOWERED MC! HUGE HAREM! R-18 CONTENTS! NO YURI! _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Happy Reading :)

Étiquettes
4 étiquettes
Chapter 1Chapter 1: Hyoudou Issei

A handsome and well-built, young man stood on a building's rooftop, his gaze fixed on the sprawling city before him.

Next to him stood a middle-aged man, appearing to be in his thirties, also admiring the view.

"What do you want this time, crow?" The young man turned his head to face the middle-aged man.

The man put his hand around the young man's shoulder, grinning mischievously.

"What? I'm not allowed to come and see my friend?" The young man looked away, trying to ignore the man.

"You're really the most trying fallen angel I've ever seen, Azazel." The middle-aged man raised an eyebrow in surprise, not expecting such a statement.

"Is that so?" he asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Then I suppose I'll just have to try harder."

The young man's eyes narrowed slightly as he gazed upon the leader of the Fallen Angels.

He had met Azazel by accident in an arcade, and since then, their interactions had been... complicated, to say the least.

"So, Azazel." the young man said, his voice tinged with irritation. "What brings you here today?"

"Oh, come on." the fallen angel said, a grin spreading across his face. "Valeria asked me a lot about her beloved boyfriend."

Azazel's words seemed to strike a nerve as the young man's expression turned dark.

"I thought I made it clear last time.'' he said, his voice low and cold. "We are not lovers."

Azazel looked taken aback but quickly regained his composure.

"Let's put that asid-" Azazel's expression turned dark as he was cut off by the young man's words.

"Tell me what you want." the young man ordered, his voice firm and clear. Azazel took a step back, surprised by the young man's sudden change in demeanor.

The atmosphere became tense as the two men faced off, both refusing to back down. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Azazel sighed and gave in.

"Fine." he said, his voice low and sullen. "I want your help with a mission."

''Mission?'' Azazel's words surprised the young man, but before he could ask further, the fallen angel continued his speak.

"It's a sensitive mission, I'll need you to complete it." Azazel explained, his voice serious.

"Alright, I'll help." the young man's curiosity was piqued."Tell me the details."

As Azazel's gaze became serious his previous attitude had disappeared.

"That bastard, Kokabiel." Azazel growled, his voice dripping with contempt. "He hasn't appeared in Grigory for a very long time, I don't know what he's scheming."

"So, I want you to-"

"So, you want me to keep an eye on him and wait until he starts his plan before dealing with it." The young man's tone was light, almost mocking.

Azazel's eyes narrowed as he stared back at the young man, a mix of frustration and uncertainty on his face.

"Yeah…" he repeated "I want you to keep an eye on him and wait until he starts his plan before making a move."

"Do you think you can do it?" Azazel asked with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

"The question is not whether I can do it." said the young man "but whether I want to."

Azazel let out a small huff, his frustration apparent.

"Very well." he said, his voice low and serious. "What do you want?"

The young man let out a small laugh, and spoke.

"I want... that." he muttered, his eyes glowing crimson.

"Are you mad?! That's suicide!" Azazel's eyes widened as he warned the young man, his voice raised in alarm.

"For you... not me." The young man's words cut like a knife.

"Your arrogance can become very annoying sometimes." Azazel muttered. He knew the young man strong, but his confidence in his own ability often got the best of him.

He needed to learn to control his emotions and not let his pride get in the way of things.

It was something that the fallen angel hoped the young man would learn soon, otherwise he might find himself in some not so good situations one day.

"Anyway, I got some work to do, see you later, Issei." Azazel smiled helplessly, and disappeared in a flash of light.

As the light faded away, the only one who was left on the roof was Issei.

Issei brushed his hand through his hair, as black-red wings burst out from his back, their shadows covering the ground around him.

As he jumped from the roof, he flapped his wings and soared through the air.

"It's time to go back, and it seems that 'they' are already back..." Issei's eyes narrowed as he sped up, the sound of his wings cutting through the air like a knife.

------

- Flashback -

In a small, cozy house lived the Hyoudou family. They were just like all families, with their fair share of ups and downs.

At the head of the household was Gorou Hyoudou, a hardworking man who always did his best to provide for his family.

Then came Miki Hyoudou, the backbone of the family, who held everything together and kept things running smoothly.

Together, they had three children: the eldest, Teresa Hyoudou, who was 5, Elisa Hyoudou, who was 4, and the youngest, Issei Hyoudou, who was 3.

Teresa was a kind and caring child, always willing to help her younger siblings. Elisa was a ball of energy, always eager to explore and play.

And Issei was a mischievous little boy, always getting into trouble and making his parents laugh.

In short, the Hyoudou family was never short of moments of joy and happiness. And no matter what, they always had each other to lean on.

Today was a beautiful Sunday afternoon, and the family was getting ready for their weekly picnic. They gathered their picnic basket, blanket, and of course, their favourite foods and drinks.

The Hyoudou family piled into the car and set off. Gorou, the father took the wheel and carefully made his way through the bustling city streets, heading toward the nearby forest.

_ _ _ _ _ _

As they approached the forest, the beauty of the surrounding nature began to reveal itself.

A cool breeze fluttered through the trees, causing the leaves to rustle. The sun shone brightly, casting a warm, golden glow over the landscape.

And as the car drove deeper into the forest, the sounds of birds chirping and the rustle of branches replaced the noises of the city.

------

- 10 Minutes Later -

Sara and Gorou were busy preparing the foods, while the children couldn't help but play together before they start eating.

Issei, Teresa, and Elisa were having a blast playing hide and seek, ducking behind trees and darting behind bushes, trying to outsmart each other.

"Found you, nee-chan!" Elisa grinned triumphantly as Teresa emerged from behind a tree.

"Mou~" Issei frowned in displeasure, feeling betrayed by his older sister. His voice echoing through the forest.

"You were hiding in such an obvious spot!" Teresa giggled, sensing the playful tone in his voice. "You can't blame me for finding you so quickly!"

"I'll make sure to hide better next time." Issei's frown turned into a smirk as declared, determined to win the next game.

"Let's keep playing!" Elisa exclaimed, eager to continue the game.

"1...2..." Teresa announced, holding up a finger to indicate the start of the countdown.

Elisa and Issei hurried to find hiding spots, each with the intension to be the last to be found.

As Gorou finished spreading the blankets next to a tree, he turned to see Sara gazing fondly at their children, her face lit up with a proud and loving expression.

"Our children are truly a blessing." she said, her voice filled with warmth.

Gorou smiled, It was moments like these that reminded him of the simple joys of life.

"They're definitely the cutest." he agreed, squeezing her hand affectionately. The sound of their children laughing and playing in the background was like music to his ears.

"Dear, now will you finish your work?" Sara asked looking at Gorou with a 'smile.

"Y-Yes, mam." Gorou let go of her hand and quickly returned to his work.

------

Issei stood stock-still, staring out into the forest as he tried to orient himself. He had been sneaking around behind a tree when he lost track of where he was and didn't see his sisters coming. Now, he didn't know where to go.

As he surveyed his surroundings, Issei felt a sudden wave of panic wash over him. He had no idea how far he was from the picnic spot and was afraid he might get stuck in the woods, all alone.

'What do I do now?' he thought to himself, feeling the heat rise to his face. 'I'm completely lost!'

Taking a deep breath, Issei picked a direction and started walking, hoping to stumble upon something familiar. He knew his best bet was to find something that would help him determine his location and guide him back to the others.

The sound of his feet crunching on the forest floor and the rustling of leaves was the only sound breaking the otherwise serene silence.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Thanks for reading 👍🏻

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audimat

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  • Conception des personnages
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Critiques
Aimé
Nouveau
Spirits_everywhere
Spirits_everywhereLv4

As someone whose fanfics are mostly based on the theme of Family and relationship, this fanfic is not my cup of tea. Objectively speaking, this is an okay novel, not that bad nor that good. While the writing quality is good and readable, and the story development is a bit too fast for my pace, the character design is not up to standard. I mean, even an overpowered protagonist would usually have some character developments. In here? There are no developments, only jumps from one place to another. Granted, there are reasons to explain it, but just hearing that it changed and hearing HOW it changed are two completely different concepts. The powers are original(?), I guess. It's somewhat unique, yet somewhat not rare as well. The power of Copy is overwhelmingly strong here, but it IS an overpowered protagonist, after all. To improve: 1) Describe your characters more. Don't just say, "6 months passed, and the dragon gave Issei all his knowledge." Explain, elaborate about exactly what sort of supernatural knowledge. Is it about the type of monsters that exist? Is it the different races? Is it the powers that exist? We know it's about the supernatural world. Still, knowledge about the supernatural world is vast and never-ending, and unless you specifically say, the readers wouldn't know and can only assume. 2) Relationships. Don't suddenly break off from your family without a dime or reason. Just because a loved one dies doesn't mean that you have to break off all your relationships with all your other loved ones. One day, your family was nice to you, and the next, they suddenly ignore you? Huh? Where's the connection. 3) You shouldn't skip important characters. Don't just say, "Issei met with Azazel over the years and works for him as an informer". The lack of details makes it bland, and it makes it seem as though it is not important. 4) As far as I can tell, the mc has no motivation or goal. Issei is already the strongest, so what is his goal now? A novel with no goal in sight is no novel. It's a diary, and no one likes to read a bland diary. 5) Time skips are important, but the way you use them makes his past seems unimportant. Don't just use one to two chapters to describe his entire childhood. This point overlaps my previous points, but it focuses more on using your various writing techniques. They are there, but they are unpolished. Research on ways on how to use them in better ways. If you don't know how to start improving, here are some suggestions that you don't have to follow: 1) Training arcs during childhood. 2) Give him some limitations (eg can only copy one thing per day, gradually increasing the power of things he can copy, he have to endure the pain as he assimilates whatever he copies, and so on.) It's this sort of thing that allows the readers to feel Issei. 3) Don't force the plot too much. If you want him to be distant away from his family, fine. But give a more valid reason (eg Azazel found him, saw his talent, and wants to take him in. Still close family agrees, but while "studying overseas" under Azazel, his parents found his two daughters has more talent. The focus on his daughters led to the neglect of his overseas son, and with less and less communication, they eventually stop communicating at all) 4) Don't rush the plot. Take your time, describe more. While some people likes things to go to the point, most don't. We are here to read a novel after all, not a kid's book. If you read light/web novels, you will see how they use descriptions to attract readers. 5) Read more novels, not fanfics. Your writing style is very obviously seen from other horribly-written fanfics. Novels are your best guide in writing, not fanfics. In the end, it's a novel that has potential, but it is badly executed. For one, there's a lot of forced plot, which makes it just barely bearable for me to read. Two, the plot is also rushed, and most events that happened happen during those massive time skips, giving little to no information about basically everything. Three is just my personal bias, but having a family only to break off with them leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Then again, the last point is just a bias.

GupGodLicker
GupGodLickerLv4

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Alert!RapiRapist Incel School Shooter Man Child Alert!Rapist Incel School Shooter Man Child Alert!Rapist Incel

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