Chapter 83 – Wings (13)

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That usual cold expression was gone, replaced by such a poignant one — anyone would be swayed by it; at a glance, it seemed as if there was some relationship between the two that she didn't know about.

Witnessing that scene, a faint sense of jealousy and anger that she didn't understand blossomed in Eugenia's chest.

As she barely contained herself, finally the music ended and the dance concluded.

Now should have been the time for Edwin to return to her, but Iris kept holding him back, blocking his way.

Eugenia's anger surged uncontrollably, and before she knew it, she found herself wedged between Edwin and Iris.

And the startled expression on Iris's face, in its own way, was somewhat satisfying.

It was only then that Edwin took Eugenia away, and she vented her pent-up frustration on him, under the guise of being drunk.

If Edwin hadn't quietly accepted it, if she had gone too far….

"…I'm going crazy…really going crazy…"

Staring off into space with a dazed expression, Eugenia muttered.

Once the memories started flooding in, they kept pouring forth before her mind could even prepare.

When she came to her senses, some ill-tempered woman was glaring at her in front of her eyes.

Clearly the young lady of the Acelus family, whom Eugene had been hanging around with. 

Claudia outright demanded an apology, and when she refused, Claudia suddenly approached to slap her face.

And once again, it was Edwin who saved her.

Edwin wholly took her side, shielding her from that woman.

Yes, unlike that so-called 'best friend' who didn't even look at the situation and only took that woman's side.

"Eugene…"

Thinking of him, her heart that had fluttered for Edwin turned chilly in an instant; though they had undoubtedly been the closest of friends, she increasingly doubted that kind of relationship lately — merely friends in words, he continually pushed her aside.

The village elders half-jokingly suggested marriage between the two, but hearing it now would likely send shivers down her spine.

Eugenia turned her head to gaze at Edwin's profile. 

Now, seeing him naturally brought a smile to her face.

Thinking about it, it was simply astonishing.

Edwin, who had nothing in common with her – how had they become so close?

Moreover, at first he was rumored to be a delinquent student who bullied others.

It had been a long time since she realized those rumors differed from reality, but now she sometimes thought it wouldn't matter even if he really was a bad person.

Someone who devoted himself to her like this — what did it matter?

On the other hand, it was a bit regrettable too. 

That there was no proper way for her to repay Edwin, and the devotion he showed her.

If, really if, he ever wanted…

"Geez…why am I thinking like this today…"

At the fantasy that had surfaced in her mind, she shook her head vigorously.

The current situation of being in his room, wearing his clothes, leaning against him side-by-side, kept clouding her thoughts.

But this was something she had been constantly thinking about lately.

Meeting alone on daring nights, snuggling close to chat, dancing while caressing each other's bodies — could that really be just friends…?

They had even spent a whole night together in the same space like this. 

No matter how much she thought about it, she couldn't confidently say yes. 

It wasn't because he was a man — she had never felt anything similar toward others.

Of course, unlike her, Edwin did seem to regard her as just a friend. 

Like just yesterday.

'Let's go to the dorms for now, next time…'

'…Why can Ellie go but not me? I want to go too…I want to go see right now…'

Right before getting into the carriage. She had childishly fussed at Edwin, and in the end he couldn't bring himself to refuse her.

As soon as they entered his mansion, she slipped off her stuffy dress, leaving her in just a single thin undergarment layer in an instant; and so she had collapsed onto Edwin's bed, slipping into a stupor. Witnessing her unrestrained state, Edwin could only shake his head wryly as he draped a blanket over her.

As the memories of the previous night's events flooded back, Eugenia's cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

"What am I to do…I've become a complete sad drunken mess…why did I keep confusing the wine for water…"

As much as she inwardly bemoaned her naivete with alcohol, what was done was done. However, amidst the shame, a pang of guilt gnawed at her. She had let down her guard, revealing her vulnerability in a way that seemed incompatible with her usual demeanor.

No matter how platonic he claimed their bond to be, surely that crossed a line…

"That's it… this is it… I'm done," she muttered to herself, her eyes tightly shut, determined to make amends.

For the moment, her priority now was to ensure Edwin's comfort. The thought of him remaining in such an uncomfortable position all night weighed heavily on her conscience.

She surveyed their surroundings. The bed wasn't so distant from the door – surely even in her current state, she could manage that short distance.

Carefully, she slid her arm under Edwin's shoulder, attempting to ease herself off the bed. However, her legs gave way, and they both tumbled to the floor with a thud.

"Hau-ugh…"

Eugenia found herself sprawled beneath Edwin. The impact had thankfully not disturbed his slumber, but this new predicament presented a different challenge.

With Edwin's full body blanketing hers on the ground, every point of contact seared into her awareness. His steady pulse, his warm breaths fanning across her skin, his radiating body heat – it all flooded over her, separated by a mere gossamer layer of fabric.

The intimate contact was overwhelming, clouding her judgment and hindering her resolve to extricate herself from the situation — she knew she should push him off, escape this situation. And yet, for some unfathomable reason, the will to do so eluded her.

"...."

She wavered, momentarily adrift.

But it didn't take long to arrive at her conclusion. At last, she grasped the nature of these cloying yet invigorating sensations — this indescribably heady, intoxicating allure.

Her choice made, she studied the man cradled against her chest. And in a soft whisper, she confessed…

"…I don't know anymore either…"

Eugenia's hands lightly carded through Edwin's tousled hair. Then tightening her grip, she pulled him flush against her, desperate to consume those maddening sensations more fully. 

There would be no pushing away, no fleeing this feeling. Not anymore.

* * * * *

Yesterday had been quite the ordeal. The encounter with Claudia was one thing, but Eugenia's final impulsive actions proved even more disconcerting. 

Out of the blue, she decided she wanted to come to my place. No matter how indirectly I attempted to refuse, the wine had loosened her typical restraint — she was deaf to my protests.

And as her expression grew increasingly frosty, I eventually had to surrender. That initial chill in the air was no mere trick of the senses.

Fortunately, Eugenia fell asleep as soon as she arrived, and I stayed up watching over her, prepared for any situation, until the first rays of dawn. I finally drifted off to sleep myself, exhausted.

I distinctly remembered propping myself by the door, yet awoke staring at the ceiling instead. A blanket had even been draped over me.

Eugenia must have assisted me at some point – I meant to express my gratitude, but she had already returned to the dormitories.

Leaving just a simple note conveying her thanks and apologies, with a request for me to meet her at our usual rendezvous spot as she had something important to discuss.

So, here I am, going to that spot at the usual time, even though it's not the day we usually meet.

She didn't say it out loud, but I'm sure she was quite embarrassed as well. Her drunken behavior was nothing short of a spectacle.

"…You came?"

"Hello."

Eugenia was already sitting on the wooden bench under the trees, her back turned to me as she greeted me. As I settled onto the adjacent log, she started slightly at my proximity. Eugenia tilted her head just enough to glance sidelong at me before speaking up again.

"Um…sorry…I borrowed some of your clothes earlier…since I had nothing to change into… I'll have them washed and return them later…"

"So that's why one of my shirts went missing from beside the bed."

"Huu…" A faint sigh escaped Eugenia's lips.

"It's fine, take your time. Not like I'm lacking shirts or anything."

"Mmm…" She gave a meek nod of acknowledgment before hesitantly continuing to steer the conversation. "…Eugene came by earlier…said he had been neglecting me too much lately…he was with that woman yesterday too…"

"Really?" 

"Yeah…he apologized…so I did too… I haven't exactly been a great friend myself either…"

"That's good. So, you're reconciled?"

"For now, I guess… I don't know… I don't have much choice… We're students at the same academy, but we're worlds apart outside…"

Eugenia's voice trailed off, filled with uncertainty. Her words made me feel a sense of relief. If they could mend things here without things getting worse, that would be the best outcome.

"And I'm sorry… I caused you trouble yesterday, didn't I?… I'm so embarrassed… Ugh…"

"Don't worry about it. These things happen. Just need to be a bit more careful with the drinking next time."

"Heh…yeah, I definitely will be…"

My attempt at humor earned a feeble chuckle from Eugenia, though she still avoided meeting my eyes directly.

After a stretch of silence, she eventually posed her own question.

"Um, Edwin. Can I ask you something?"

"What is it?"

"…Why don't you ever call me by my name?"

Her unexpected question left me speechless. Had I never called her by her name? Thinking about it, I think that's probably true.

I realized that when referring to Eugene, I almost always called him "him" or "that guy." Was it a similar aversion that made me subconsciously avoid using her name?

Hearing her perspective gave me an unsettling realization about my own peculiarities.

"I…I'm so sorry. I don't have any excuse."

"Could it be because my name is similar to Eugene's…?"

"…I must have started doing it subconsciously…"

Contrary to my expectations, she didn't appear hurt or saddened. If anything, she seemed relieved, letting out a sigh as if a weight had lifted.

"…Then it's alright. I was worried there might be some other reason…"

"…I really am sorry…It was never intentional…"

"I know. And you don't need to apologize, it's fine…" A faint smile played across her lips.

She lapsed back into silence, and I found myself at a loss for what to say next. After a moment, she abruptly turned to fully face me – the first time showing her expression; her pale green eyes glinted softly in the moonlight. 

"Say, Edwin. Could you do me one small favor? It's nothing too difficult…"

"What is it?"

"…In our village, there's a custom where the closest friends give each other special nicknames, just for the two of them. I like your name, but since you seem to have trouble using mine…so…so…"

Eugenia fidgeted with a lock of her hair, trailing off. But she soon mustered her resolve to continue.

"…So I was wondering if you could maybe give me a new name instead? That way you'd feel more comfortable using it…what do you think…?"

"…You're sure I'm allowed to do something like that?"

"Of course you are. In fact, I'd prefer it if it came from you."

Her insistence carried an uncharacteristic firmness.

While the tradition sounded unusual to me, I could believe each rural village carried its own idiosyncratic customs and rules; truthfully, I had no reason to refuse. It was her way of acknowledging our closeness. And if I turned her down now, she may well take real offense…

"…Are there any, like, guidelines I need to follow for the name itself?"

"Not at all. You can make it whatever you want, any name is fine."

There, amid the secluded forest glade in the depths of night, I fell into deep contemplation. Eugenia waited patiently by my side, allowing me to think.

After quite some time had passed, a name came to mind.

"How about…Selene?"

"Selene?" She quirked an inquisitive brow.

"It's derived from an old word meaning 'the moon itself' or 'moon goddess'…We always meet super late, and this clearing is bathed in moonlight. It seemed…fitting, I guess? If it's okay?"

"Selene…Selene." The mint-haired girl mouthed the new name to herself several times, as if weighing how it felt; a subtle undercurrent of warmth, even excitement, colored her tone. "I like it…"

Before long, Eugenia turned my way again, her expression alight with a gentle entreaty, "Umm, Edwin…could you use my new name for me? Just once…the one you gave me…"

Though I felt oddly self-conscious, her hopeful gaze rendered me powerless to refuse.

"…Selene?"

The girl nodded, seeming deeply satisfied as a full, radiant smile blossomed across her features — not her usual bright and subtly innocent smile, but a deeper, more profound smile, filled with stronger emotions.

"Mmm."

Selene…the newly-named moon maiden gazed back at me with inscrutable depths shining in her eyes.

If you want to read the first 25 chapters for free and read up to the final chapter for a cheap price patreon.com/Makima02