Fucking Demons!

"Oh, okay," the pointed-eared demon said, looking a bit disappointed, but started operating the computer. "According to your standard version score, you are about to…"

The demon's voice suddenly dropped, and the confident expression turned to a hint of panic.

"What's wrong?" I started sensing something was off.

The demon worked on the computer for a while, finally looking up with a foreboding expression and said, "Sorry, sir, your name isn't showing up in our system."

"What does that mean?"

"It means there might have been a small bug in our system upgrade," the demon said in a "I'm sorry, but can't offer any further assistance' way.

Okay, my life is just a minor bug to them.

"So you're saying I wasn't supposed to die, but a small bug in your system caused my untimely death?" I asked to confirm.

The demon nodded, "Yes, sir, you've understood correctly."

I struggled to control my impulse to punch him in the face and said, "So are you going to send me back? Don't worry, I'll just consider today's experience a dream and completely forget about it when I wake up tomorrow."

But the demon shook his head innocently. "Sorry, sir, I don't have the authority to send you back. That's the work of the reapers. You know, a big company's common problem is that everyone can only handle their own small piece of responsibility and can't go beyond their jurisdiction."

Damn bureaucratic incompetence!

"Can I file a complaint? I need to immediately complain to protect my legal rights. After all, you're funded by taxpayers, right?" I asked uncertainly.

For some reason, this sneaky guy gave me a feeling of unreliability.

"Sorry, sir, the complaint system is currently not available due to computer system upgrades."

Sure enough, the demon still wore that infuriating professional smile, but his words made me even angrier.

To be honest, I've always been a pacifist, opposed to violence, but this pointed-eared demon was pushing me to my limits, especially with that hypocritical smile that made me want to rip it off his face.

So I decided to use the most primal solution.

I stepped forward, grabbing his impeccably ironed suit and shaking him violently. "Listen, I don't want to cause trouble. But I was just eating my fucking fried chicken and watching the fuckign cartoon on a Friday night, then your stupid system brought me here. I just want to go back, okay?"

"Easy, easy, sir. There's no need for violence," the demon raised his hands, trying to calm my anger,"I think we can find a way to resolve this issue" . 

"How?" I no longer believed his nonsense. But the next thing the demon said left me stunned.

"How about reborn in ancient times?"

"Reborn in ancient times?" I repeated, unsure.

The demon seemed pleased with his suggestion and flashed a smug smile. "Yes, reborn in ancient times. You know what that means, right?"

Of course, I knew what this menas. As a homebody, online novels are one of my main ways to pass the time, and Historical rebirth novel are one of my favorites.

"Will I get a system? Like a wish-fulfilling system or super vision? Of course, I'm okay without a system too. I'd be satisfied just to be reborn into a noble family and live a life of luxury," I started envisioning my future life.

"Sorry, sir, systems are reserved for super VIP clients. If you purchase…" The demon began pitching again.

"No, I don't have money for the premium services," I flatly refused his sales pitch.

"Okay, let's see what services you can get," the demon said, looking down and typing on the keyboard. After pressing the last key, a portal suddenly appeared on my left side.

"Sir, this is your exclusive reborn portal. Becoming a noble requires approval from the Lord of Hell himself, which is beyond my authority. So within my powers, I've selected the highest level of reborn treatment for you," the demon said, appearing sincere.

But for some reason, his expression gave me a feeling that I was about to be fooled.

"What's that?" I asked warily.

Why would this demon suddenly become so kind, after showing his profit-driven nature when I first arrived?

"Sir, you can take a look for yourself. Behind the portal is the world where you'll be reborned. You can see it by yourself."

I could see the world I was going to be reborned into? Cool.

I turned around to examine the portal carefully, but all I saw was white smoke.

I turned back to the demon, suspiciously asking, "Why can't I see anything?"

"Oh, sir, you need to calm your mind and feel with your heart. First, close your eyes and take a deep breath…" The demon demonstrated by closing his eyes and breathing in. 

I skeptically closed my eyes and started to…

But before I could finish my breath, I got a hard kick right in my backside and the powerful force pushed me towards the portal.

What the hell!

Before I could say another word, I heard the demon's smug voice from behind, "Enjoy your journey, sir."

Fucking demons!

Never trust demons, and never negotiate with demons.

As I entered the portal, I started falling rapidly, and my consciousness began to fade.

What I didn't know was that after the portal disappeared, the demon wiped the sweat off his forehead with a sigh of relief, a sinister smile curling up at the corners of his mouth as he said, "Okay, Mr. Fairfax, I think our little bug has finally been fixed. Maybe we'll meet again soon, but by then, You will be a client who dies in the usual manner.."