A Kobold's Journey

"It hurts, It Hurts, IT HURTS!" I thrashed around in the bathroom clawing desperately at the noose around my neck, thrashing my legs around for any sort of place to stand on and to get this horrid thing off my Neck! "HELP ME..! P-please..." I yelled out with a small gasp of air but no one is coming, no one is going to come for me. I'm all alone in my family's apartment. "I-I don't want to die!" I yelled louder and louder wasting each breath as I feel my body grow cold, the stinging sensation around my neck, the coldness growing out from the center of my body, the shuddering of my body as I feel my body slowly stopping. One last thought, one last memory went into my head, the memory of why I did this.

My name is Yong, I am a 19 year old girl, I am around 172 cm tall, or around 5'8. I got into college, after so many long years which felt like a eternity yet also feels like a breeze. I was the expected girl, I had good grades, I had a group of friends, I always listened to my parents, but it's not right. Everyday I am supposed to push myself until my eyes sting and my heart sinks, just to pass one test and repeat. Each day is harder then the last, I wake up early, I review, I eat so little just to give myself more time, I walk to school surrounded by others who don't have to push as hard, who don't have to try as hard! It's not fair! I do so much more, I suffer more, I do more, just to be the girl that get's used. This isn't fair, why do I have to go through this just for a different, hardly working nuisance to force me, me a person who has worked so hard until I couldn't bear it anymore, just to give my work, my credit to someone else. 4 painful years, I could've told the teachers, but how could I? No, it's not how could I, it's why wouldn't I? I'm pathetic. I'm sorry to everyone because of the girl I am. After graduation I was able to go to a good college, I got my high school diploma, I was going to be an astronomer, I was going to see the stars, until it started again. Pushed harder, I was having trouble even seeing and had to redo my work and readings several time's because of how delirious I was becoming, shapes and pages melding together, the light from my lamp becoming a wave of color upon a jam of words and shapes. Yet I couldn't stop, I needed to continue, I needed, to be better than him...I wanted him to recognize me... my brother to understand me, and that I wanted to be appreciated not just by my parents but him too. I tried, is trying not enough? Why is it not enough, what did I do wrong?

As I feel myself coming to a standstill, I see a light emerging from the door to the bathroom, I don't want to look, I don't want to see their disappointed faces, knowing they failed. No it's not my parents who failed, it was me who failed. I don't want to see their disappointed faces but I just want to see them, before I die, but I can't it's gone all dark, I'm at the end. The end of my life, the light soon fades as I turn away from it. "Did I..turn...? I can talk.. no I don't hear myself this is... my mind talking to itself.. but I turned! I just know I did!" I look back with a newfound sense of hurry and clarity as I see the light, I see.. a shell? I hear cracking, I feel something different about my body. I reach out to the light as my vision fills with beautiful light I'm free... from an egg?