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Chapter 214

Why the hell should I even bother?

I wasn't always like this, always….so depressed. When I first woke up I did my best to track Felicia down. But Walter knew his stuff. I got one frame of her face in a security camera in JFK, but nothing else. She was gone, like a ghost in the wind.

And that's when I slowly started to give up. Everything was pointless.

A month into my 'retirement' Fury had canceled my training with Nat, guess in the end he figured I was going to quit being Spider-man, and he was right. I wasn't an agent anymore, I didn't want it.

I looked up at my ceiling, God I had that stupid thing memorized by now. Why? Why did she leave? What am I saying, there's no question of why, I know why. Did I really expect her to pick her dad over me?

But all those times, all those times we spent together, the plans we made, we would get a house together, a place just for us. We would...it doesn't matter now anyway.

The next day:

"Have a nice day at school!" May called out.

"We will aunt May!" MJ called out as she waved at her good bye. I pulled out of the driveway and drove us to the dreaded place known as school. I hated it even more now. No point. I had a scowl on my face and MJ noticed.

"Peter," she said slowly, "you need to snap out of it."

"What?" I asked knowing the answer.

"You know what," she sighed, "it's been two months Peter. You need to let her go."

"I'm working on it," I lied.

"No you aren't," she snapped at me, "you're just wallowing in your own self pity and doubt and doing nothing else! It's been months since you did anything other than go to school, and...since you were Spider-man."

"I know," I told her, "and?"

"And? Peter, I know you, you can't stop being the hero, not even for a second. So this little act you're putting on-"

"-Shut up!" I snapped, "you don't know what you're talking about," I was no hero. I'm a coward. MJ was silent for the whole trip. We reached school and went our separate ways.

Classes were dull. I lost count of how many times I begged Richard to let me skip it and go directly to college instead. He refused of course. Stupid stubborn man.

I was barely alive when in classes, I didn't care what was being taught. When lunch rolled around I sat down with Liz and MJ as they talked about classes and such.

Just then Mark came over, "hey girls, Peter," he greeted us all as sat down next to MJ. She smiled as he leaned in giving her a kiss, "hey sweetie."

"Hey," MJ smiled, oh yes, I almost forgot about him. Damn musicians, always rolling over other people not caring about their feelings. Does he think I need to see this right now?

"So Pete, how are things?" Mark asked, MJ hit him in the shoulder, "what? I was just wondering is all."

I sighed, "I'm fine Mark. Stop asking." Mark Raxton, a plague on my being. It's not that he and MJ are a thing, it's that he and MJ are a thing and totally in love. Reminded me of Felicia.

"Right," Mark cleared his throat and turned to MJ, "so what are you doing tonight?"

MJ smirked, "nothing, you?"

"Well, Harry's hosting this party in his place outside the city...if you're interested?" he suggested.

"Right," MJ smiled before her eyes went wide, "no wait! Liz, don't we have that project-"

"-Don't even sweat about it girl," Liz said not bothering to look up from her phone, "I was going to cancel on you anyway. I have plans tonight."

"Oh? With who?" MJ asked.

"Just plans," Liz replied.

"Oh, 'plans', I see, who's the lucky guy?" Mark asked.

"None."

"None?"

"As in none of your business," Liz snapped back with a smirk, "anyway," she looked at me, "are you going home after school?"

I nodded, "probably."

"Harry's party-"

"-Wouldn't go even if he begged me."

"You don't have anything better to do."

"I would rather watch paint dry than go to one of Osborn's parties."

"Right," she drawled out, "okay then...we all miss her you know. It's not just you."

I looked up, "yeah, I know."

"You can't beat yourself up about this."

"I know Liz," I said in an annoyed tone. No one said a thing, turning to ignore me as was normal. I didn't mind, I had nothing to say.

"Liz!" Candice, a cheerleader and one of Liz's friends called out. She and the rest of the cheerleaders quickly crowded around Liz. After Felicia left the trio broke apart, MJ had Mark but Liz was alone. So she reached out to her old friends, and things were back to normal.

"So did you hear about Janet?" a blonde with long hair asked, Patricia I think, "she like totally got pregnant."

"Why do you think that?" Liz asked curiously.

"Because last week at Josh's party she didn't drink," Amber said with a grin, "and you know how much she loves her booze."

"No way," Liz gapped, "isn't her dad like a Republican or something? Is she going to keep the baby?"

"I don't know, but if it was up to me I wouldn't show my face around here anymore," some brown haired girl said as she looked over her shoulder and glared at Jannet.

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