The past is haunting!

In the vast world of human emotions, there's one thing that is ever present and true of everyone. It stands above all. It is the undeniable mark, left by our first true love. It is an integral part of our life, an experience that goes beyond time. It is a memory that goes deep within the chambers of our hearts. The essence of first true love is an amazing journey that leaves an everlasting impression on the soul.

The genesis of first love is as pure and innocent, like the fragments of first rain and the heart of a newborn. Two souls, unknown to each other, yet they are drawn to each other by an unexplainable force. The journey of first love is filled with curiosity that knows no bounds, no strings, just two souls connected to be one. Every interaction and every stolen glance in every heartbeat there's purity and peace, like never before.

The value of first true love is unaccountable and far beyond the boundaries of the relationship itself. In this false world, that is the only thing as pure as heavenly bodies. And amongst all human experiences, it's only the experience of first love that is immune to change. Regardless of what the outcome is or how deep or painful the memory may have been, it's an integral part of our life, our story. I don't know about others, but it was, for me, a sense of enlightenment. The memories of first love remain sacred, like a treasured piece of precious jewels locked away in the chambers of the heart.

In my case, I tried to forget it all and start fresh. My first step was to look for potential candidates through social media. As I discussed earlier, I was a shy guy, so it was better for me to chat online rather than talk face to face. That doesn't necessarily mean that I never talked with girls face to face. But it's just that I prefer to chat. Because I can express my emotions through my writings, be it on a piece of paper or through social media.

I started going out with my friends. Stay out till evening. In my situation, I was doing whatever possible to forget her. After all, I still have my friends and my family. Each time I would scroll through social media, I was somehow trying to find her. In every girl I met or chatted or even talked with, I would try to find her . It was as if I was trying to find a replacement for her. I didn't notice the fact that I was unconsciously putting my attention on girls with similar personality traits and names as her. With hopes that I will find someone like her, or better. I kept looking for my special someone.

No matter how hard I tried, I simply wasn't able to forget her. In an unconscious mind, I was still connected with her. The magical moments that we experienced together were a part of some fairytale. And, after each failed attempt, I would randomly go through my other social media accounts just to see what she was doing. I wasn't stalking her. It's just that I wanted to know if she feels the same way, as I did for her. Or did she forget me so soon? Women aren't that great of a compassionate individual, as most men are. While a woman can get over things quite quickly, we men , well at least some of us, try to be loyal, try to be connected even though the bonds are broken. Men are kings, after all. But on some occasions, there are women who are truly incredible and loyal to their loved ones.

In a false sense of empowerment and development. I somehow managed to put myself together, I wasn't sad or something, just too nervous to let it go. And so I decided to master the skills of flirting. I tried to talk with other girls from different backgrounds and different colleges, and in these digital times, thanks to social media, creating a connection between two strangers isn't really a big deal. Through the use of my different social media accounts, I had been in friendly terms with many girls, but in all of them, all I could see was just a random somebody, and not someone who touches your heart.

It was a frustrating situation, to be honest. As I scrolled through all those profiles and engaged in endless conversations or at times met with individuals in our classes, I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was missing. Ok, I have to be Frank. It wasn't that I was being judgemental, or I am a stereotypical. I was just not getting back the response that I seeked. It wasn't that these girls weren't nice or beautiful. Some of them were really beautiful and gorgeous but not what my heart wanted or looked for. I was looking for a connection, a spark that was missing in all of them. Or maybe I was being too picky or conservative in my choice of looking for partners.

My friends didn't have any idea on the subject of my inner thoughts. They would, at times, tell me to talk with random girls in the college. Oh wait, did I mention that I joined a science college, as I wanted to be a physicist. Ok. Let's not get into it in detail. So, as I said, my friends and we would often go to our classes early so we could have a chit chat with the girls of other batches. In our college, the girls had their classes in the morning, while we boys had to endure the heat of the sun as we sat in our classes during the noon. But no matter how beautiful or friendly they were, I never felt the connection or attraction that I felt for my lady in Green.

In the grand array of human experience, the experience of first true love stands above as an irreplaceable chapter. Perhaps people change, times change, but our inner self doesn't change. Perhaps it is what makes us different and keeps us unique. And maybe that's why we can never get over our first true love.