Chapter 6: Narcissa Black

Narcissa Black was always very good to Severus, she helped and advised him many times.

He also used to help her with many issues or other doubts she had, but he and Narcissa never really became friends.

Despite their good relationship, she was always in a very different world from his.

Or so he thought as Snape had before.

She was loved and admired by everyone, she was also the most beautiful and wanted woman in Slytherin and even all of Hogwarts, while he was the opposite, he was only known for his skills in the dark arts and potions, while physically he left a lot to be desired.

That was why they never became anything more than good acquaintances, in the past, he wouldn't allow himself to think that he could be friends with someone like her, it was he who never associated her as a friend, but Narcissa certainly considered him her friend.

Severus suddenly remembered what Lily had once said to him in his fourth year: "You'd think she was a princess by the way everyone behaved towards her."

Narcissa used to be the centre of attention at Hogwarts and it was understandable, men always acted like animals in the heat with Narcissa, so much so that it became very unpleasant, but both Lily and he had admitted that Narcissa was very dazzling.

Once Narcissa finished Hogwarts, she maintained a relationship with Lucius Malfoy, and Severus being friends with Lucius, used to talk to her quite a lot.

The two of them had a very good relationship and now Severus could admit that she was, in fact, like a friend to him, he just didn't realise it before.

He didn't see her as a friend before or didn't allow himself to see her as a friend, but now he could understand that they were always friends, he was just too stubborn to see it or accept it.

"You honestly can't expect me to believe that!" she chided him with a look that told him it was impossible to fool her.

"Believe it or not it's the truth and I have a lot of other things to think about right now, but Lily isn't one of them," Severus replied quietly and truthfully.

The last thing he wanted to think about right now was Lily Evans, that was why he had decided not to think about her anymore as it would bring him no good.

"Really...? this...? Are you serious?" Narcissa asked weakly with a suspicious look on her face, she clearly found it hard to believe him.

"Please, you know you can talk to me, Severus," she added.

"I know, Narcissa, I know, thank you for that. But what I said is the truth," Severus said with a faint smile.

'She really cares about me' thought Severus amused, he couldn't understand how he hadn't realised before the friendship he already had with her.

He was beginning to doubt if he wasn't a bit of an idiot, so smart he was for many things, but for others, he seemed to be completely blind, it didn't make any sense.

Narcissa seemed very surprised by Severus' response.

"Severus..." she said sounding hesitant and a little frightened.

"Are you sure you're alright..., you're behaving very strangely today, not that I'm complaining, but it's not normal to see you smile or hear you say... 'thank you...' " she commented a little uncomfortable not knowing how to gently describe the obvious changes in Severus' attitude.

"Yeah, well..., I just rethought a lot of things and now I'm looking to turn over a new leaf, kind of like a fresh start. Pathetic, I know," Severus said, knowing how absurd what he was saying sounded.

But he also couldn't tell her that he now had the knowledge of two lives and that his obsession with Lily wasn't all that occupied his mind every bloody minute of the day.

Narcissa looked into his eyes, searching for any trace of a lie in what he said.

A few seconds later, she relaxed and sat down next to Severus, asked the bartender for a bottle of brandy, and looked back at Severus.

Narcissa was wearing a long, flimsy white dress.

Severus had to admit that she was very beautiful.

'Well... she always was' Severus laughed internally as he realised that he had been so crazy about Lily before that he hadn't even given himself time to think about other women.

"A drink...?" asked Narcissa offering him a glass of her brandy.

"Tea's fine for me, besides... Isn't it a little early for a drink?" asked Severus, thinking about who the hell drank brandy at this hour.

"When you've got a boyfriend who's so involved with.... well, you know who..., you end up getting used to having a drink to relax your day," Narcissa replied as she poured herself her drink and looked wearily at Severus.

Severus grimaced at that response.

He could understand that it shouldn't be easy to be involved with a dark wizard when war was brewing and to make matters worse, Lucius was already a death eater loyal to Voldemort, so it was safe to say that Narcissa wasn't having an easy time of it.

'I hope Lucius doesn't make the same mistakes I did with Padme...' Severus thought a little sadly but pushed those thoughts away.

He knew that Lucius and Narcissa's situation wasn't like his with Padme.

That's because Narcissa had the same ideals as the Malfoy's and most pureblood supremacists, but she wasn't comfortable with violence let alone war, so she didn't get involved but she was aware of everything that was going on.

"So..., how have you been, I haven't seen you in..., what has it been, 1 year, how are things with your fellow Slytherins, are they still looking to be part of this war?" asked Narcissa.

"Well, there's not much I can tell you that you don't know, you should already know most of the things that happened. But on my own I'm better off now, as for Rosier, Mulciber and Avery, yes, they still seek to be involved in the cause" replied Severus.

"Uh-oh, you don't include yourself, didn't you dream of being part of the cause?" asked a surprised Narcissa.

"Is it because of the Muggleborn that you now have doubts?" she added, glaring at Severus.

She had turned to look Severus in the eye, she wanted to make sure he wasn't lying to her.

The only way Narcissa knew how to find out the truth when she spoke to Severus was to look him in the eyes because his face was always unreadable.

Her eyes were very large and clear and the blue irises stood out clearly against his pale face.

Very different from Severus' completely black, cold, deep-set eyes.

Narcissa's eyes gave a warm feeling while Severus' gave a cold one.

It was clear that she was very surprised by Severus' attitude, but she seemed to be associating all these changes in him with the recent events involving Lily Evans.

"We both know it's preferable not to talk about such things in ...public..." replied Severus softly, mentioning the unsuitable environment of the Pub to talk about such things.

"Don't tell me, Evans...!, all this sudden change in you is because of her!, Severus listen to me carefully, don't do anything you'll regret, I know from Lucius that things are going to start changing and I wouldn't like to see you on the wrong side!" said Narcissa with concern clear in her eyes and voice.

"Hey, don't worry, I know what I'm doing, you know me," Severus tried to calm her worries.

"Precisely because I know you, I know what you're capable of for that muggle-born and that's why..."

"Narcissa!" Severus interrupted her.

"I... sorry Severus, I'm just worried about you, I know how much she meant to you, and now that the war is only getting worse every day..."

"I know, don't worry. You can be sure I'm not going to do anything to put myself in danger and between us, Lily Evans isn't the reason for anything I do this time," Severus said.

"She won't even talk to me now and I don't plan to push her anymore either, I'm looking to do things on my own now and I just want to think things through a bit better, I'm not choosing sides, I just want to think about me, do you understand?" added Severus as he took a sip of tea.

Narcissa gave a prolonged sigh, looking away.

"I understand Severus... If you say so, I trust you," he sighed and she nodded giving him a soft smile.

"I'm glad you can start thinking of yourself to let go once and for all of that muggle-born who never treated you the way you deserved," she added taking her whole glass of brandy and then refilling it with the bottle.

"Yes, it certainly is, although it's a pity she hasn't forgiven me, but it's good to start making my life without thinking about her," nodded Severus, watching with some surprise and amusement as Narcissa sipped her brandy as if it were water.

'Damn she likes to drink' thought Severus.

Narcissa sighed again with a bored look on her face, clearly indicating to Severus that she didn't consider his separation from Lily Evans to be a pity.

She couldn't care less about that Muggleborn, she just hoped to see Severus separate from her and her unhealthy obsession, someone as intelligent and talented as him didn't deserve to be with a Muggleborn like Evans.

"Changing the subject..., tell me about yourself, Narcissa. You've hardly said a word about yourself. What are you doing these days? With Lucius is everything going well? Where are you working these days?" asked Severus.

Narcissa was working at the Ministry and she told him a bit about her work.

Severus listened intently, nodding and asking questions, his black eyes full of interest, real or feigned, but Narcissa went on and on about many things, occasionally laughing at some things in the conversation.

The gold rings glittered and sparkled every time she lifted her thin, pale fingers to cover her mouth from laughter.

"Sounds like a very fascinating job," Severus commented as the conversation drew to a close.

"It sounds like you really enjoy working at the Ministry and from what I hear, you have big ambitions," he added.

"Well... I certainly enjoy it, but things are tense these days at the Ministry of Magic and Lucius isn't very happy that I'm still working there" nodded Narcissa and then sighed with a hint of frustration and exhaustion in her voice.

"I'm curious, you didn't talk to me about how things are going with Lucius, is that why you only talk to me about work?" asked Severus already guessing that things weren't going so well between the two of them.